Chronic anxiety

Hi debs

Thats right, one of my friends, went through the menopause aged 35, didnt know until her periods stopped, it explained a lot to her afterwards, as to why she was storming out of the house with anxiety attacks, instead of taking out on her poor husband, incase he thought she had gone nuts, she never even went to the drs, because it didnt enter her head that she was on the menopause aged 35, then my next friend, was only on it for 3 years, became post, and got  next to no symptoms during and after, which is great for them.......... But what  gets me is when, some women have said, and these two friends didnt, but i have had one that has said this to me, well its a natural thing for the body to go through, so, we should embrace it, this was after telling me, she had next to no symptoms during or after it, well we can all say that, then couldnt we, depends on how bad your fluctuations are, and what it does to the individuals body, what a boring world we would live in, if, everyone was the same, and if i was one of those women, i sure would sympathise with ones who are going through it, and be thankful, and, think myself lucky if i did go through it symptom free, oh i wish..............thats what gets my goat  

That's how I know my mum didn't suffer much. She asked after a friend one day and I said she was suffering meno problems. Apparently she had told mum she had problems 5 years before.

My mum said "what? Still?

there must be something else wrong with her"

I wish I had been like that too, I was always so happy and healthy before.

And yet they say, you normally follow your mums menopause, doesnt always ring true does it, just shows you how wrong drs can be, they shouldnt gives us false hope like that should they....................haha............i tell you what this menopause has taught me, you might as well stay away from drs, because if it isnt in their faces with a blood test, they havent got a clue, so, once they have done the usual general bloods to make sure everythings working ok, after that, you might as well diagnose yourself!!

Haha..I love stay away from drs. That is a true statement. If the bloods show normal, then you are fine. That's exactly what I've been getting.

You said it Elaine. I had so many tests done last Spring/ Summer cause I lost so much weight thinking I had cancer or something else bad. All came back normal. Just slight high bp. Not once did they say any of my symptoms including the weight loss were related to menopause. Not even my OB. Was so upset. I stopped going to all of them cause they weren't listening to me, nor able to help me. They only wanted to prescribe me with anti-depressants.

So I googled stuff and found this forum. This forum was my only saving grace. I did my own research and worked some things out on my own. Started exercising more, eating more so gained most of my weight back. Symptoms have lessened or become more controlled. Some things still bogg me down like annoying night sweats, some dizziness, headache, forgetfulness and joint pain

and trouble sleeping sometimes. Anxiety has eased up too. I think my vitamins b12 and D help with that. Tying to just get through it without taking it day by day.

Thats good didi, sounds like you have a handle on it, well done. when i went when i was 47, my female dr, said you cant be on it, your not 51 yet?? then the specilists who i was seeing for something else at the hospital, did two tests 3 months apart, positive for menopause, said i needed HRT, went to my dr, she did the test, said no its normal, do they not realise what they are risking, saying things like this to severly menopausal women, and my drs a woman!! in england though, due to cut backs etc, on the nhs, its all down to money, i think they use the cancer risk as a scare tactic sometimes, i mean the only thing they hand out willingly, is anti depressants.

Yeah. We're not crazy. Just need good, professional advice. Trust me I'm in the U.S., and our drs. are just as bad. It' makes it hard to trust any of them. Like we are guinea pigs. The medical industry is just awful.

I agree with that. I'm in the US and it is not any better. It's hard to find a good GP. My doc doesn't hear anything I say after I tell him I'm 38 and still have a menses. My blood work always seems to come back fine except for me being anemic and I take supplements for that. In his eyes hands down I am too young. I have done my own research and I realized that with some good vits, and a few lifestyle changes I will try to manage this thing on my own. Now it's just about seeing what works for me.

Yes thats right, see what works for you! good luck with it. 

Totally agree with that Didi!!

I don't know what this 51 attitude is? I was led to believe that all my symptoms were down to depression and not to expect any meno problems until then!

Only after the menopause did I find this and other site's and realise this is exactly what all my problems were about.

I had even been told I was in peri menopause, "but it's nothing to worry about, all it means is you still have some eggs but not enough estrogen to push the remainder out"

Surely they must know it affects some women like this?

You cant move on then can you, because, YOU know its not depression thats causing it all, and saying that to someone would make that depression worse, so, it isnt solving anything for the patient, they are still left with WHY ?? I said  to my gp once,  whats causing the depression, and she said you are, i said, no im not, its coming in a set pattern along with other symptoms, and  ive  had two positive tests for menopause, and also told her i had, had several period changes, and she actually argued me down on both, so, in the end i  just dug my heels in until i got the right test for myself, and by this time, it became more to proove me right in the end, and say well, thats one in the eye to my gp, a person i trusted, and who i have to go to get help from, when im ill, and if the bloods  dont show anything, then instead try listening to your patients symptoms,  forget the tests, but more than anything, understand! and dont ever argue a patient down with all that proof, and then, only accept it is the menopause, because i threatened the surgery with a complaint!! nowadays, with a lot of gps thats really what you have to do, too many people in this country, are dying because of failings within our health service as a result of this attitude gps seem to have nowadays.  

Specialist would definately know, but  doubtful that a gp would, as they just generalise more, their not specialists as such in any one field, but they have ears, and experience, but i think i am being too kind their to be honest.

At least you were told that you was in perimeno. They dont even consider that when they learn how old I am. Im 38 and they just simply say, it cant be and i'm just too young. It's so darn frustrating.

They were so quick to send me to this specialist and that specialist neurologists dermatologists psychiatrist etc. All that when a good meno specialist would have just said all this is meno related try some HRT!

I'm really surprised that we don't have more meno clinics, they would save the NHS a small fortune.

I so agree with you. I hate drs. After all my tests came back negative and I was still depressed and losing weight. All they could say is that I had anxiety and wanted me to be put on anti-depressants. They didn't even make the connection all my symptoms over the Summer were peri-menopause related. Now when I go to mg Dr. She asks if I have any problems. I lie and say no. I figure she's not serious about me. I'm not going to be with her. It's very sad but esdier on me to not get all stressed out doing more unneeded tests. Go are just that. They know nothing about menopause. There should be meno. specialists out there that know, understand and treat correctly, and with a good bed-side manner. I guess that is too much yo ssk of drs. today. To me- they all are worthless.

I know the feeling. I had two hospital stays of them running tests and having scans and several ER trips and all tests came back negative so they still couldn't find anything. I was clearly having peri symptoms. It wasn't until my aunt came to the hospital and said to me the docs aren't going to find anything wrong because you are fine, you are in perimenopause and they will not be able to diagnose it because they don't test hormones. Which made perfect sense. I researched peri when I came home and low and behold all I was going through was staring me in the face. It's absolutely sad how docs don't put this stuff together.

yes agree with that didi, there be a menopausal clinic at every surgery, that would be a massive help, save a lot of money on hospital tests.

yep agree didi, i think with drs nowadays its arrogance,  they dont like being told whats wrong with them by the patient, and if its not in hyour bloodwork, its in your head,  what bothers me didi is, how many people, are on tablets for anxiety, depression, when really its the menopause, and if they havent diagnosed them as being onthe menopause, how long, are they gonna be on those meds, risking more side affects in the long run, so having to take more to combat the side affects years later, its a false economy,so im suprised they do it, probs because they are in the pockets of the major drug companies,  imagine what that does to a persons confidence, to be told,  there, there, its just anxiety depression, which, some people will believe, it could devastate, who they thought they were, and turn them into a quivering wreck who couldnt put one foot infront of the other, youve got to go in fighting with drs nowadays.

 

You are right on Elaine. It's all a business. No empathy or real care for the patient anymore.

You couldn't have said that better. I know my anxiety is part of peri. I've never had anxiety like this. All my doc could say was, you need to relax and gave me a script. When I told the doc at the hospital about my head feeling funny, he said you've been checked and you are fine, it's just anxiety that's common in women your age, talk to a psych. That lead to me to believe that I wasnt the first patient he saw and heard with that complaint. I was on my menses that day too. Docs that don't have any knowledge of meno and the effects it has on women just generally don't care.