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I feel so down

Posted , 3 users are following.

sandra58556
sandra58556

Hi everyone.

I know i have posted on this forum before and i am sorry that i keep coming back but i do need some kind words and verbal help.

I just feel so down all of the time and i cannot get my head above water.  

I feel so lonely and i feel like my confidence has just gone altogether.

I have a few close friends and i am sure they are sick and tired of me being so dismal all of the time.  I know i have got to one of my friends as she is visible backing away from me. Isnt around when i most need to just have a chat and i feel like screaming cos we used to be so close.  

Dont say make new friends as it isnt easy when you are over 60, a parent and a grand parent. Long story but i havent spoken to my daughter in over one year and she wont let me see my grand kids which doesnt help. I have retired and my husband is still working - got another 3 years to go before he retires. But the days seem long and i feel so lonely. He knows how i feel and just says i have a lot to be grateful for - which i know and i dont know why i should feel this way.  But people who have depression will know that sometimes there is no rhymn or reason for it all. All i know is that i am so down and lonely.

I have steered away from Drs and medication up to now but maybe i should go along and have a chat. Any advice would be welcome.

Thank you for reading.

2 likes, 5 replies

5 Replies

  • maria_1963
    maria_1963 sandra58556

    Posted

    You can post on here as much as you like - that is the point of this forum , reach out to the many who follow this particular section - Depression , i expect others on here will be able to guide you , help me more then me , sometimes friends can feel overwhelmed by anothers illness whether it is a mental illness or physical illness but the important thing is that it is not your fault , is there any local charities , elderly people centre's , etc where you could do a hour or two volunteer work , local book club , if you like walking , doing crafts etc - look for groups for light exercise , general chitchat & tea , depression can hit people for different reasons and i do feel it would be worth seeing your doctor - they may be able to give you a light antidepressant to see if it would lift your mood , please take care , know you are not alone on him xx
  • lorraine52317
    lorraine52317 sandra58556

    Posted

    Hi Sandra

    depression is not an easy thing to live with and is a prolific thief of time, relationships and health. Sadly people who haven't suffered with this, do tend to think we can just snap out of it.

    I am in my mid fifties and depression has made me feel old and washed up/ready to be put out to graze.

    It's also hard to motivate yourself but try to set yourself small targets to build up your confidence. I know it's not easy but it's achievable eg trip to the shops and make small talk.

    I understand how difficult the situation with your daughter must be. Could you not extend the olive branch and send a little card letting her know your thinking of her. Life is too short and whatever has happened between you, can be fixed. I would certainly pop to the doctors as untreated depression can takes its toll on your health in the long term.

    I really wish you better, things will seem brighter with the right help.

    god bless ♥♥

    • sandra58556
      sandra58556 lorraine52317

      Posted

      Hi Lorraine. Thank you for your kind words but as i said to Maria, since i posted a very close and dear friend has died. He was ill for some time and this was expected but just not yet. I didnt get to say goodbye and the worse bit was the fact that the last time i saw him i was in a hurry. Trying to get to the car park before the ticket ran out, when i could have bought another ticket. We hugged and he looked so frail. All of this had just made me feel worse. Thank you for you kind words, i am going to have to go along to see my dr, i cannot go on like this. Life is crap at the moment. 
    • maria_1963
      maria_1963 sandra58556

      Posted

      Even if a friend is expected to pass away it doesn't make it any easier when they do pass - it shows how much of a impact they had on your life - in a way that is a good thing as good friends are important , he won't have blamed you for not being though - he wouldn't want you to feel guilty though i can very much appreciate that you will , it is a tough world out there , it is good that you are seeing your doctor , i hope he can refer you as well to CBT as a talking therapy could help you with those thoughts , feelings - understand why you feel that guilt , etc , please take care and remember there are many people out there who understand what you are going through , including on here xx
    • lorraine52317
      lorraine52317 sandra58556

      Posted

      Hi Sandra

      so sorry to hear the sad news about your friend. I am sure he knew that you cared very much about him. You wasn't to know that the meeting in the car park would be your last opportunity to see him. I know this must be a very painful time for you and my thoughts and prayers are with you. ♥

      Life and death are something we ponder about frequently in our lives. Death seems so final and yet it still holds that mystery of 'what's next'. I personally think we do go on in some way, and when we acknowledge the miracle of life, we should consider the miracle of 'what's next'.

      I am glad you are going to see your doctor. All this stress and sadness can take its toll on your mental and physical health.

      Please let me know how you get on, I really hope you start to feel a little better soon. If ever you need to share your thoughts, I'm here ♥♥

      Take care of yourself, and hopefully you will see your doctor soon?

      God bless xx

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