1. Community
  2. Mental health
  3. Depression

I'm on a downward spiral and lost

Posted , 7 users are following.

david93189
david93189

I'm a 39 yr old male. I have 4 beautiful daughters. Have been through and done alot in life but over the past few years have dealt with spells of hopelessness. I get down. Tired and hate myself. Feel like there is no point and I don't belong here. I've always done well at any job I have worked. But lately don't even care to work and feel that I am not good enough at anything. I feel that everyone would be better without me. I have made so many mistakes that there is no way I will ever be able to make up for them. I spent countless time just laying in bed. Sleep alot yet always feel tired. I'm not hungry. Really just want to end it all but don't have the guts to go through with it. I know because of how I am people just walk away from me. I put myself in a box and no one can get near me. I'm not sure why I'm writing all this. I just don't know what else to do. Every day is a battle. Every minute. Another thought of how useless I really am.

3 likes, 9 replies

9 Replies

  • charllee05390
    charllee05390 david93189

    Posted

    Your not useless and dont ever think that you are. Your daughters need you. They need you to protect them from the monsters under the bed and embarasse them with annoying dad jokes and "dont break my daughters heart"s on prom night. They need you for their first dance at their wedding, and to be there when your grandkids are born. When you feel like giving up, get out of bed. Go find them. Go play with them. Fix their owies and kiss them goodnight. If anybody needs you, they do. Talk to a doctor and get some help. Do it for your daughters. God Bless

  • ajrm2389
    ajrm2389 david93189

    Posted

    I feel the same way you do,the only thing I don't understand is,I'm gay,I have no family at all to speak of and I feel like a total waist of space! I envy you,no I'm selfishly jelouse of what you have ,but know it has nothing to do with that. Think of me when your touching your child to know you are others dreams.

  • Wilb
    Wilb david93189

    Posted

    You are very depressed and need to get therapy and get on some medication to help you! Believe me I have been there and there is hope for the future! Go see your doctor and discuss your feeling and he/she will help you through this!
  • steven43881
    steven43881 david93189

    Posted

    I am in the same position you are in, David. Your words moved me so much. Don't know how I am ever going to get out of it. Want to end it all, too, but also don't have the guts to go through with it. 

    • alan56015
      alan56015 steven43881

      Posted

      Feeling the same here. Why is it something tells us we should be happy because of various things in our lives but we are not and suffering. Are we taking things for granted? Do we expect more from life? Are we judging ourselves against others? I wish there was a magical cure. I'm going down a spiritual route (as well as taking meds) to find an answer there. Good wishes to all

    • nikki-yvonne
      nikki-yvonne alan56015

      Posted

      Hi , No one  knows how it feels to be depressed if they have not experienced it  - I too are going through another tough point int my life but I have to believe I will over come the hard times and become stronger .It is not how much we have in life it makes no difference ,i was in hospital around 15+ years ago ,it was only then i know i was not mad when i meet people from all walks of life bankers etc , It opened my eyes there is help out there and that we can get treatment to get better -I have realised there is not magical cure ,not to judge ourselves just to do the best we can until we can reach the place we feel ourselves again - Good luck all 
  • david93189
    david93189

    Posted

    Well. Made it into another day. Not sure what I am going to do to get past this feeling. I know I have people that love me. I know they want me here. Yet I myself cannot get past this feeling of not belonging. Thank you all that responded. I hate that I'm not the only one that feels this but relieved at the same time. I hope one day we all find a way

    • alan56015
      alan56015 david93189

      Posted

      Hi David

      Each day jot how your day went and how your feeling. We can all try to help each other. Let's see if we can muster a few good days. Best wishes

  • stevo1975
    stevo1975 david93189

    Posted

    Hi David,

    Sounds like you are experiencing something like what I experienced Depression, however I am not qualifried to say that I suggest you see your GP whom can properly assess where you are at, there are some options for people who suffer depression for example if that is what it is...... Cognitive therpy and medication.

    There is light at the end of the tunnel you wont feel like this forever mate its just a balance that needs to be found. Your family would be heartbroken if you considered ending it! Why end a great life stay positive my friend go and see the doc and begin the journey to recovery life is a trip! make sure you book yourself a long distance journey smile   

Back to top

Report or request deletion

Thanks for your help!

We want the community to be a useful resource for our users but it is important to remember that the community are not moderated or reviewed by doctors and so you should not rely on opinions or advice given by other users in respect of any healthcare matters. Always speak to your doctor before acting and in cases of emergency seek appropriate medical assistance immediately. Use of the community is subject to our Terms of Use and Privacy Policy and steps will be taken to remove posts identified as being in breach of those terms.