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Finaly admitting work to much

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hazel70459
hazel70459

Last night I had a seizure (suffer Catamenial/ functional seizures). And i had to txt my boss to say cant come in. Woke with a migrain plus fibro pain is increasing Not a good day!!!!!!!!!. My Aunty visited me and helped me start ball rolling for PIP. Not sure if i will get it, but just feel like work is to much stress of knowing i will be in pain after shift then stress about if i am off i wont get paid. I have tried for so long and strugled.Its mentaly hard to come to this decision because i want my independence. But i have struggled for years only 42 . Ahh well. Last week went for nurophycology app she was really nice, have a few more visits think positive this will help. Sorry just going on Just needed to See how other people cope with this decision.

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  • mary50992
    mary50992 hazel70459

    Posted

    Dear Hazel,

         Sorry I haven't been talking to you for some time. I have been over whelm by the night shift I am doing. Today I decided to stay awake and go to the library and than to the shopping mall. I still get moments when I am how can I say it spaced out. I see lime green around what I am looking at. I tell myself forus and look away. It is a dazed moment. Doing night shift is stressful on the old body.

        I'm so sadden about your last seizure. Migrain headach is so bad plus fibro  pain. I had migrain alot when I was a young woman. I know your suffering. I use to ask my mother to come over and watch my four children while I tried to sleep it off in my dark bedroom . My mother was very kind to me in many ways. She was a good grandma.

       Are you thinking about not working anymore or just cutting down the days of work? It would be mentaly hard to come to that decision because we all need independence. Being only 42 is not fare. My daughter Charlene is 42. Your medical problems are burdenson. Almighty God knows the secret person of the heart. Hazel, I feel for you even though  we live across that big pond called the Alantic Ocean.You can vent in both my ears any time you want. We are women after all. What is PIP?

        Hug your puppy for me. What is Catamenial/functional seizures?

        The weather here has been cold to the point of wearing a light coat with a winter coat over it. Being a old girl can be chilly at times.

         Give your self a hug from me. 

     

    • hazel70459
      hazel70459 mary50992

      Posted

      Hello Mary, hope you are ok. Night work suits some people, my husband works permanant nights suits us both as he snores ha ha . Catamenial is to do with my body producing to much estrogen around my period thats why had coil fitted as it has a hormone that should balance me out. Plus Functional seizures or Nead as its more commonly known. Nurophycologist said its caused by supressed trauma / child hood trauma ( in my case). Thought i had dealt with it when had cbt.I have had to seizures this week already One last night and today when i had finished my super market shop, good job husband was with me. Have to go back a couple of times then see what will help best. Any way puppy or Charley as he is known is great, alot of work but love him so much. Growing so quick already. Weather here hit and miss but i dont mind love all weathers. pip is the new disability payment. I have cut my hours down to 12hrs a week now but still find it a struggle , the pain alone is getting worse especially in my knees and lower legs . Plus the randomness of seizures effects my job. Ahhh well i might not get it . big hugs back from charley. And one from me. Take it easy Mary and good health. Xxx
    • mary50992
      mary50992 hazel70459

      Posted

      Dear Hazel,

         Thank-you for telling me what Catamenial is. Too much estrogen in the femal body would cause a up heavel. I remember just before I had my period I had such a craving for chocolate and anger etc. which was not me as I normal am. I controled it and kept it to myself. I suffered with terriable mirgrain headachs.

        Functional seizures is anoth word for Nead. Everyone in their lives have had trauma in their child hood. My list goes on and on. You have no control as a child. Some times yes. Here a example. One day my father took my older brother and myself out on a car ride. My father and brother were in the front seat and I was in the back. My father pulled over to the side of the high way and came into the back seat with me. He was all over me , kissing and rubing against me. I yelled at him. He told my brother to keep his eyes forward. There I'm sure my brother knew what was going on. Not fare on him either. I got out of the car by pushing him away from me. He speeded away with my brother. I went to the nearest store and asked for the police to be called. When I got home my mother was not there. She was visiting a girl friends house. I got a beating in front of her friend. My mother did not have mercy on me nor did she leave her husband. How confusing is that to a child? Bad memories are just that. The time back than was so different than now or is it. How many children right now are suffering throught trauma. I remember my traumas . The bad and the ungly. I love who I am because I am one of a kind in this world. I'm a health care aide for the elderly . These ones are someones father, mother etc.

          When I was at the worst of my seizures I couldn't go away because they happen all the time. Pip is the new disability payment. Ours is called WSIB. I hope you get the coverage from Pip. It's chilly outside here but the sun is shining. Big hugs back at you.  

    • mary50992
      mary50992

      Posted

      Dear Hazel,

         Just saying hello and how are you doing. The weather here is warm and sunny. Was in hospital with a painful blander infection. It has cause me to  be feeling weak and sore. On meds for it. Give your puppy a hug for me. 

    • hazel70459
      hazel70459 mary50992

      Posted

      Mary , how very painfull for you. Bet you feel awful. Sending you a big hug. And a big big hug from charlie. Weather here is cloudy but warm. Well i hope you take it easy. xx
    • mary50992
      mary50992 hazel70459

      Posted

      Dear Hazel,

         Just wanted to tell thank-you for sharing your time with me on this form. I feel I am just some what over whelming to you because I disclose too much about myself, sorry. I hope only the best to you. Mary, seizure free so far.

    • hazel70459
      hazel70459 mary50992

      Posted

      Dear Mary, dont ever appologise , you never overwelmed me. Its been good to comunicate with you. I am still having seizures, had one today in the middle of town of all places my Aunty was with me and some very kind people helped. I wish you all the best and you enjoy your cruise you deserve only happiness. You know where to find me. Been a pleasure to share with you Mary. Hugs xxx
  • mary50992
    mary50992 hazel70459

    Posted

    Dear Hazel,

         Hope you are fine and seizure free. Hazel, found out that you can't personally get each others e-mail by looking at another person's message. They informed him that he can't give his email on this forum. Oh well. No seizures still. Good news. My right arm is very sore in the shoulder joint. Going to the doctor about it. Maybe related to meds or just old age. Life can be such a pain in the behind sometimes.If it's not one thing, it's another.

       Just had a memory of seizures while running on a bus home with my daughter. Everyone looking at you. The clonic seizure tightens up the chest muscles so breathing can be differicult. Being already asthmaic  my dear daughter tried to help my breathing with my puffer. The situation was most trying. I had a hard time walking home after the seizure stopped. No one on the bus said any thing or help my daughter .People really do not know what to do. If you ever tire of me, just let me know. Thanks for caring. 

  • mary50992
    mary50992 hazel70459

    Posted

    Dear Hazel,

         It has been a differicult two weeks for me. As they say when it rains, it pours. True. I had a painful bladder infection and ended up in the ER because it was the week end. My doctor doesn't work the week ends. Was put on meds. Than my right are joint started up with pain. Six days later I ended up going to a walk in clinic because my doctor was booked up. Had ultra sound done and x-ray. My arm muscles were injuried at work on night shift. There are two of us health care aides . My co-work makes a nest and sleeps for four hours and I don't do that. She also doesn't work together. So I change 26 residents by myself. Some are not happy when they are awoken . They want to kick and punch your lights out. My doctor doesn't not want me to work until he says so.  That's in a nut shell. I'm some what depressed or up set  etc.

        Yesterday I went to Centre Island, beautiful park. It is a man made island in Lake Ontario. I took the ferry over. I just walked around looking at things. Nice place to enjoy some nature.

        I'm so sorry to hear about your seizure in town. I have had many seizures being our and about in front of people. It's a terrible feeling of no control. I'm happy that you were with your aunty. Can't live in a bubble. I do feel for you with all my heart.

        Sometimes I feel like not having seizures for 3 months now is so unreal. It's like waiting for the cat to jump out of the bag. My future air flight will really test me if I'm really seizure free. Brave girl I am?

         Hugs from across the big blue pond.

  • mary50992
    mary50992 hazel70459

    Posted

    Dear Hazel,

        Excurse me I pressed some wronge keys on the key board. I hope you can make our what I meant to say. Yours truly Mary. The weather here is so nice. Bye.

  • mary50992
    mary50992 hazel70459

    Posted

    Dear Hazel,

         Hope you are doing fine. Haven't heard from you of late?

  • hazel70459
    hazel70459

    Posted

    Hello Mary, been a while i am still the same. Weather here is good at the moment. Been walking charlie with my daughter. How are you now?.
  • mary50992
    mary50992 hazel70459

    Posted

    Dear Hazel,

       We have been getting alot of rain but it's great. The garden is growing so much and besides I don't have to water it. Today is humid 22c.

       What's new with me. I had a asthma attack this morning but I use my puffer and was able to pull myself out of it. Still no seizures, four months. I wonder if it will last?

       Went to Centre Island on the ferry. It is beautiful over there. My daughter and I went down to harbour front. We watch highland fling dancing. Beautiful dance. We ate lunch at a Irish pub. The food was so good. Today I will be working a night shift. I asked my head nurse for how long. She said maybe 6 months. There's no life like it because you have no life Painted my washroom by my living room a purple pink colour. Looks good. Need to retile the floor.

       My grandchild came for a visit. We all went to Edward's Gardens. Flowers everywhere. Nice day.

       Two months and some for our cruise and air flight. Oh I so hope I will be O.K. on lift off and landing.No seizures, please.

       Charlie must be growing so big now. My son Johnathan is planning to move and work in the U.K. next year. He is 23 years old. He has two jobs. Assistance vet and Perina Company supply dog and cat food. He does dog training for this company. I just told him the best if you do move to the U.K.

       How are you doing?

    • hazel70459
      hazel70459 mary50992

      Posted

      Dear mary , Thats great that you still havent had any seizures. I havent had any for a few days. Two months until your cruise bet you are excited. Weather here is good, few light showers cant complain. I love all seasons. Charlie has grown , every morning he looks bigger. We all love him so much. My husband didnt want another dog but he fusses over him more than me ha ha. I am in pain today after work, trying to look for somthing less manic. Just doing 12hrs now see how i get on. I hope your night shifts stop sooner for you. When is your son coming to uk?. If he comes to Chester i will have to get his help with Charlie. Sending you a big hug xxxxx
    • mary50992
      mary50992 hazel70459

      Posted

      Dear Hazel,

         My daughter has said I have most likely heal from too much exposure to iodine. I hope she is right. Those seizures were pretty bad to live throught.

         Some work is better than no work. My head nurse told me only about 6 months of night shifts. I will hold her to it.

         My son Johnathan told me that when his lease on his apartment is up next May he wants to go and live and work in the U.K. He is so good with dogs.

        The weather here is beautiful, sunny and cool.

         Sorry to hear that you are in pain. It can be so tiring.

          I think this forum has more people using it now. I have read some new ones. The poor souls are so scared about having seizures out of the blue. I have tried to comfort them and reasure them that it is their bodies way of expressing that things are just not right. There are so many people suffering  with these unexplain seizures.

          A bigger hug to you.

         

    • hazel70459
      hazel70459 mary50992

      Posted

      Hello Mary , How are things with you? i am soooooo pleased that you are seizure free I wish i could say the same for myself had three last week worse one was Friday night  muscle twitching couldnt walk properly or talk getting very frustrating as I had to take the following day off work, I only do a 12hr week as it is . After all that going on my fibro pain is at a 10 out of 10.But  remaining positive you have to, its sink or swim cheesygrin. Well mary the weather here is muggy few on and off showers. need a good thunder storm. Charlie is growing fast , starting to get past that biting stage, thank goodness. when i am feeling good my husband and i take him out. I love him ( charlie ) and of course my husband , its nice to get out and about. away from the sofa and tv. I have toilet trained him so now my daughter takes him up with her at night now, but i always find him back in his room in the morning, she says he farts to much rolleyes dont we all darling ha ha ha better out than in i say. well i am off to bed in a moment take the pain killers , things we have to do. work tommorow only 4hr shift but its enough. my boss is being very understanding, but i feel unfair to her letting her down when i get like this. All the years i have worked i have never had so much time off, apart from when all this started years ago. not long for your cruise now. big big huggies keep well Mary. biggrin
    • mary50992
      mary50992 hazel70459

      Posted

      Dear Hazel,

        Excuse my mistakes when I am typing when putting the wronge words in. I see them when I have already replied to you...off to food shopping I go.

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