Bpd, depression and anxiety. My current story please don't judge
Posted , 3 users are following.
I am aware that BPD is formed and caused by childhood trauma, sexual abuse, neglect or abodonment. But I have suffeered with depression and anxiety from the age of 13. My daughter is 3 years old and has currently been removed from my care as I had some really bad episodes, I had a really bad mental break down and when you are in crisis you don't think. I've always been self destructive and would only hurt myself. I understand why my daughter living with me at the moment could cause her to experience negative behaviours, 'y daughter has never been exposed to my moods, blips or self harm which is why it angers me that social services say at some point she has had emotional abuse and that im not emotionally available to her it kills me because I love my daughter and I give her everything I didn't get as a child emotionally and mentally physically . Luckily my daughter is living with a family member but it is under a court order. I am currently receiving therapy and trying to manage my mental health in a better manner as I want my daughter home as soon as possible. I was honest with services and said I needed help with my daughter but it back fired on me. I'm doing everything in my power to help myself and still see my daughter everyday I just don't have her living with me and it breaks my heart. I am having more good days than bad days at the moment but anyone with bdp will know you don't know how long that will last for.
What I want is a bit of advice on my situation and also want to know if BPD is something my daughter has a chance of getting because I have?
Sorry for the long post. I literally don't want anyone to think I'm a bad mum, judge me or make me feel worse than I already feel about my self.
Thank you
2 likes, 3 replies
sandy_so_sad keeley67009
Posted
Your not going to be judged and I'm betting your a wonderful mother. Don't judge yourself neither you can't help how you feel. Just work on getting better and work towards getting your daughter back.
There has been evidence that bad does run in families but no reason to believe your daughter will suffer with it.
keeley67009 sandy_so_sad
Posted
Rubyroamer keeley67009
Posted
This happened to me some years ago when both my children were removed and put into foster care due to my mental illness. I never gave up, made sure I attended all appointments and engaged with social services. As time went on and I still had limited access I decided to get legal advice. Long story short after numerous court appearances and lots of medical reports AND taking children's wishes to be with me they were eventually phased back home. It was very stressful and I basically was on my own with little support but I did it. I has now been accepted that there will be periods of hospital admission but overall the children are much happier with me. Of course they are now older and have a better understanding of the situation. NEVER stop trying to get your daughter back... it will happen. I wish you and your daughter all the best. Feel free to PM.