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Long depression concerns

Posted , 5 users are following.

Poetrygirl
Poetrygirl

Thank you for reading this. I am 44 and have had depression on and off since age 17. Currently been depressed this time since January. Finding it hard even wit doing the basics such as washing and doing anything for myself. My motivation is awful.

I am on sertraline 200mg, quetipine 100mg and mirtrazipine 50mg. I was diagnosed with BPD, borderline personality disorder and it threw me. I also have anxiety and am isolated. I have no friends. I have a fiancee and it cuts me up to see him feel so powerless and I want to be further along in this journey but I am stuck. My mood fluctuates and I can rarely stop ruminating. Please let me know if you've ever been in a similar position as me. And how you got through. I am quite desperate. Thank you.

1 like, 7 replies

7 Replies

  • steven43881
    steven43881 Poetrygirl

    Posted

    I am where you are, too Poetrgirl

     

    • Poetrygirl
      Poetrygirl steven43881

      Posted

      Bless you. I am now several months into this and things are very strained in my relationship. My fiance wants me to return to my own house but I don't want to go in case it means it is over. He said he has come tomresent me as he can't get doi g his own routines cos I am here. He has said I am not strong and I feel he is always putting me down and even being emotionally abusive at times .....

  • lynne82155
    lynne82155 Poetrygirl

    Posted

    I have had depression for nealy 17 years and anxiety started in December.

    I know how you feel some bouts i go through leave me unable to function.

    I just weather the storm and hope I come out the other side.

    Do you have family  who can help or a therapist?

    This forum is excellent for support

    Stay Strongcool

    • Poetrygirl
      Poetrygirl lynne82155

      Posted

      Thank you Lynne. Sorry it has taken me so long to reply. Seventeen yrs is a long time. You are strong.

      Yes I have a few aunts who might help me. Before when I was down they took me to their house for dinner. I have recently been worrying that my partner is being emotionally abusive. Have done a lotta reading about it and he has isolated me and turned me against my friend. He is becoming fed up with my illness as it is lingering and I am still struggling with self care and my confidence is on the floor. Sorry to ramble ... I am must so despairing.

  • Mashuga
    Mashuga Poetrygirl

    Posted

    Hi my heart goes out to you as it sounds like you're having a really tough time. Talking is the best tonic really, being as open as you can with a therapist about how you're feeling. I find light exercise helps also although it takes a supreme effort. Being on the right meds is key. Take care
  • gary78460
    gary78460 Poetrygirl

    Posted

    you tryed green tea it will help alot,it has a chemical in it that alows seratona to pass over the brain,never been into herbal crap but it does help abit on top of the medication,try cutting sugar out as well,hope u feel better soon
  • KMRC
    KMRC Poetrygirl

    Posted

    Sorry you are suffering so much.  Depression does zap all motivation and everything else.  Since you have had it (off and on?) you know this will eventually wane. Take one step at a time, keep in touch with your docs and family and give yourself a break.  Stop blaming yourself, this is not your fault.  You will be in my thoughts and I wish you a speedy start to recovery.
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