12 Week in on Citalopram
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Today marks the 12 week on Citalopram. I thought I would be better but just not feeling the best still. Should I go back to my doctor and see if there is something else that can be done? They have helped as my anxiety is a little more controlled but still have the feeling of being lost. Life just seems very weird to me and the purpose of life makes no sense. Time seems to just move on and peoples lives move around me but I am in a stand still. I dont feel any emotion for anything or anyone.Couldnt even cry if I wanted to. Does this all seem like the depression/anxiety or is it something else I should be worried about? I drank for the first time in 3 months this weekend. Could that be adding on to my anxiety? I slept like crap last night and only got 2-3hrs of sleep.
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It's quite normal to feel calmer, but not better yet. SSRI's take so long sometimes, First you get the horrendous side effects for weeks and when they wear off you feel calmer, sometimes flat like a nothingness or sometimes quite happy. Everyone's different. After a while you'll get the anxiety back and all associated feelings that go with it. If you just accept this as part of recovery, you'll find it'll disappear again. These are called setbacks (blips) and are quite normal in recovery, and you get many. You'll be up for maybe an hour or half a day, then down, then be up for a few days or a week, then down again. This process will continue for maybe months, and each time the ups will get longer and longer until the downs will be no more.
People often given up too soon or go back to their doctor when having these setbacks and get their medication upped, which causes more side effects.
It can take so long to get better - months. Recovery is so slow that sometimes you hardly notice it, but these ups and downs are a sure way of knowing that's it's working.