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This is my story so far, hope it helps someone.
So here goes, I've been threw sexual abuse as a child and then as an adult (31 now) I had 2 failed domestic violence relationships I gained 2 amazing boys from each. I've always managed without becoming depressed until I got with a man I thought was perfect for me , never been so happy was madly in love, he became possessive and paranoid. I'd got threw that before so knewi had to end it even though it broke my heart. Well a week later hadn't told my boys by this time as I wanted then to think he was working away and we just drifted apart (didn't want them thinking all men are bad) he turned up at school with a girl I'd introduced him to, this destroyed me , he said he did it to get me back, no chance I was to strong for that. Then one day at sports day I had to walk across the field past all the other parents and just cudnt do it, it was the scariest day I wanted to cry and hide away so went straight to docs, I was put in sertreline wow this was horrid , I didn't sleep for 5 days cudnt eat felt so I'll so went back he put me on 40mg citalopram. All was fine so I thought, I had CBT, read the secret, helped myself become positive. In the time I've been on them (2 yesrd) I've had my gallbladder removed (early days of starting citalopram) so after this I cudnt eat just had no appetite, started sweating excessively . went docs was givij sickness tablets and all sorts of drugs to help, non did , got sum sweat roll on didn't work , I'm waiting for botox appointment. Well I've met sum amazing people in the last 3 years and removed all the bad. The good people made me see that I Dont need medication just positive nice people around me. I missed a day of my medication so thought fuxk it I'm gonna stop. Well so far its been a week and god I feel horrid. It started with a weird drunken feeling in my head, then I ended up getting unexpectedly drunk (I Dont drink) and had a good night. Well I woke up throwing up and acid cuming out of my bum, honestly it was horrid, but since my gallbladder removal this is how alcohol makes me . well I've been thinking it is. So after 1 day of non stop toilet visits , I thought Sunday I'd feel fine, nope exactly the same and again Monday, today's Tuesday and I still feel like my heads drunk, I've felt so sick all morning but can't be sick. 1 good thing though, my appatite is coming back already, I ate 3 meals yesterday (normally struggle to eat 1) this morning I ate before I left for school run, which I haven't done in years. I was starving and the sickness feeling was horrid. I normally live off coffee and fags in a morning, but I've totally gone off coffee n not enjoying smoking either. Sleep, well its strange, ive suffered from nightmares for as long as I can remember. But I think this is due to citalopram . at the minute its like I'm awake but having dreams awake, im constantly tired, feel like my eyes could close whilst I'm driving down the road. I'm having hot and cold sweats all day and night, my mouth tastes horrid, I Dont drink water but I'm craving it. So far I haven't felt down but I think that's coz I'm telling myself I can do this and staying as positive as I can, even with all these withdraeel symptoms. I'm hoping that by the time my appointment for my botox comes I will no longer be sweating and won't need it as it was just a symptom from the citalopram. Spoke to pharmacist this morning was told I'm stupid for coming off like this but I have researched and feel like I Dont need them if anything they have caused me more issues than I started with and wish I had not accepted the tablets and just had CBT and self help. Read as much as u can on positivity and get to no yourself. I've also put 2 stone on , baring in mind I hardly ate, I did try exercising but stopped coz I was still gaining. I used to be a gym freak, grew muscles in places I didn't think possible. I just want to get back to me . I've blamed the gall bldder removal for all this and so has my doctor but I truely believe its the citalopram that has done all this to me. I'll keep updating as often as I can, I've searched google, read forum after forum and decided I would tell my story. We can all beat depression without tablets, they just make things worse, this is my belief. Good luck to all coming off or even starting them.
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Rangers3131 samantha43075
Posted
samantha43075 Rangers3131
Posted
Thank you. I've read that people have withdrawals weaning off them aswell so thought Ill just carry on. I've not had the brain zaps yet, I'm hoping I Dont coz they Dont sound nice. I'd love to exercise but as you've mentioned no energy, its horrid. No I'm the same, will never go back on them, I can remember life before them and I was fine , the more I think about before taking them the more I see how much I've changed, I used to always dress smart now its about feeling comfy in tracksuits looking like a tranp. I'm so looking forward to being back to me. Well done on coming off them, I really hope the brain zaps stop for u soon. I totally agree they Dont, and we Dont no unless we do out research. Thabkyou and good luck x