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3 days in a row and i am coping and calm through a serious crisis.

Posted , 5 users are following.

ozzie1961
ozzie1961

I havent a clue what is to come of the evicition , i have no money to even deal with it, over the past 4 weeks my anxiety was making me so ill and i was in an unbearable mind mode of wanting to self destruct and just dissapear offf the face of the earth,

But I have a calm, quiet no fear day which followed on to the Sunday and now its Monday I have not just been calm not required any diazipam, but also had a constructive day talking to the housing odvocate that is working overtime in my housing crisis situation.

Something babout the love, compassion and care I am getting from several awesome people in here is beginning to ware off on me.

I am at my hopsital tomorrow and again on Wednesday to seee how my immune system is going , it wont be good news i know that.

But just having a bit of my life back and being able to cope under the circumstances and the real reality od crisis is quite mad in itself to be coping with all the pressure thats around me

Thank you to those who know who they are for the continual support, for the advice and those prayers to a loving God whter you believe in Him or not is ok with me .

But someting is fially working.

It may all change within the hour .

At least I have had 3 god days in a row after many mmany months of terrible distress and pain.

Hugs

​PJ

0 likes, 19 replies

19 Replies

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  • r_99925
    r_99925 ozzie1961

    Posted

    I'm new here, but I feel for you. I have health anxiety and is bad a the moment. Very hard to find someone to talk to.
    • ozzie1961
      ozzie1961 r_99925

      Posted

      its not hard anymore as you have found touyr way intho this room full of people who know and appreciate the lonliness , the isolation and the pain that anxiety brings into our precious lives.

      You are valued in here , and have found HOME , like i did just 3 months back.

      This is the place where you can rally open up and say it as it really is at that moment for you.

      never feel alone again from this time onwards.

      We need you as much as you need us.

      Stick with what is positive and what is truly the best therapy on offer available where you are talking to the real professionals and be the comrade you know you can be.

      Your my freind from now and I am yours.

      This is serious stuff we are all dealing with , its not a fantasy world , this is reality and we are never far away from you at any time.

      Start to be grateful and thankful as you read my message that some how and for some reason you like i have stumbled across this forum and are now arrived at home with people who understand you, peoiple who want to support you and people who want you to kow you are awesomer and amazing and unique.

      And most definetely not alone from this time onwards.

      use this forum all you need  and as much as you can , listen, learn put into practice what people are willing to share in the advice they offer you and before too long you too will begin to learn as I am today how to cope, how to breath and how to know what is true and waht are lies all those things that attack our mind, our bodies and our most important souls.

      Know you have real value and are unique and amazing.

      U may not feel that right now

      But trust me with a little effort that starts with you

      Your going to be on a whole new journey that is going to direct you in a compassionate way that will help you to stand and not fall , and when you do fall as i often do I retunr to those in here who understand are not ready to tell me to get on with it and have no clue but people that are now family for you that want the very best for your life and to just begin to learn to cope with everything in your life.

      peace to you right now as you read this message

      I suggest you wlk to a mirror after this and takre a good look at yourself no matter how you fell and make a promise to yourself you are going to take the journey and you are going to find out really your true value and it starts with teling oursleves in the mirror , you know what mate Your ok.

      i got it to the point i actually started to say I love that man in the mirror.

      Its gonna happen for you too my dear friend

      PJ

    • r_99925
      r_99925 ozzie1961

      Posted

      Thank you ! I'm in Texas (us) I am married and my wife does not understand at all, and it is very hard to find a man to talk too. I've had anxiety for my whole life but I have not it like this for many years. It is constant all day long uneasy feeling. Uneasy is really kind of an understatement if you know what I mean. Very scared to take any medication.
    • r_99925
      r_99925 ozzie1961

      Posted

      I did want to say I've never read anything quite like that it was beautiful. Thank you
    • ozzie1961
      ozzie1961 r_99925

      Posted

      I understand you perfectly my dear texan brother.

      Your with people who understand in a porfound way what you are experiencing .

      And the techique is to trust those who want to help and support you, try different techniques and step by step you are gonna make it through and learn to live with the same disability that we all have in here, trust me it would like to kill us but know oh so well that your life has value , it sustains meaning and there is a road we all travel it is already planned before us .

      What you have to live with is something that can make you strong and a amazing individual who is full of compassion and love for the needs of the person right in front of you.

      You will get through this but step by step.

      Dont expect your wife , your family , your freinds or work collegues to understand what it is about anxiety and how it affects your daily life.

      Just be re assured you have come home to this forum and are with your "other family" and togerther in numbers we have the power and the ultimate strength when times are so damn hard as they are for me at this time knowing I am facing living on the street with serious chronic illness , next week and my loving best mate who has taken on the carer role with me.

      between us we face homeless neess and its terryifying if i allow the though to over ride and blow my mind into complete histeria , but through the strenght and knowlege I have recieved in this forum has ke me calm , sane and level headed and even trying to find an escape route .

      i have never been homelss in my life apart from when i was in san Diego and took myself onto the streets for 48 hrs as I had gotten to know a homeless guy in his 30s who was such an inspiration to me and damn it was frightening but hey I learned so much about myself and had so much to be gtareful for.

      I will not allow the fear I have known to dominate my thoughts right now

      I am under the wings of a heavenly Father who will supply all my needs according to His great and marvelous richess.

      right now it is my buddy and dearest freind who is having a major withdrawal and is certainly with depression and anxiety wwhich has come from loving and caring for me , even while going through 27 final exams to get a 3 yr degree he was about to complete.

      The strain on him is right now immenses and I am finding its me holding him up at this time.

      We have the right to claim the best for our lives not 2nd best and i so much want my life back which has been lost to me through hatred and 3 1/2 years of really horrendous harassment , where the tables were turned on me and I have been gang style dragged through a trial with a hopless defense lawyer who lost the case for us.

      But I wont lay down right now

      I need this room and the family i have found in some awesome and most beautiful individuals who keep me alive and wanting to live.

      Hugs and may you find your way through this step by step.

      And make sure you drop by in here daily to give or to recieve.

      That what we are all here for.

      Mighty Manly Hug to you

      PJ

      in London

       

  • Bird82
    Bird82 ozzie1961

    Posted

    I'm so glad you're feeling this way now. You have immense strength and will. I am still praying that things work out for you as I truly believe you deserve it. Please take care of yourself as best you can. You're gonna make it through this Ozzie, I know you will. Xx
    • r_99925
      r_99925 Bird82

      Posted

      Could you please tell how this site works. I'm new and would like to talk to someone. I have health anxiety.
    • elizabeth20203
      elizabeth20203 r_99925

      Posted

      Hello, You have already figured out how it works, if you post yourself people can reply to you. Or you can reply to others. We all talk from our own experiences and offer support. You can private message people if you want to talk private to someone specifically. Hope you find this forum helpful.

      Elizabeth.

    • r_99925
      r_99925 elizabeth20203

      Posted

      Thank you, I'm assuming there are people on here from all over including the US I know that there are a lot of people from the UK I've noticed.
    • elizabeth20203
      elizabeth20203 r_99925

      Posted

      There are people from all over the world on here including the USA. Thou unless people say where they are from then we won't know.
    • ozzie1961
      ozzie1961 Bird82

      Posted

      Thank you so much Bird for your thoughts , your prayers and such compassionate and meaningful words.

      I am going to do my very best to ride this crisis thouhgh as right now its my dearest freind and carer thats really finding it tough to cope and manage.

      he tries to hold everything indside being the man he is and he doesnt want to ditress me any further.

      What an honour it is to have a true freind in him over the past 8 years , we have always been there for each other.

      Sadly he decided last friday to not complete his exams after 3 long and expensive years of sudying at college.

      I am now praying the head of the college will take compassion on all that hard work and understand the fatigue and distress his is in and allow him to do the exams in september rather than have to return to do a whole extra year with more student loans.

      Hugs PJ

  • deirdre._03652
    deirdre._03652 ozzie1961

    Posted

    Dear, DEAR, Ozzie.....what a beautiful, beautiful post, it is full of love and giving and you are a real and fantastic inspiration to others..I am so happy that you are coping and calmer at the moment, you deserve so, so much help to finding a place to call your own and a solid and productive future.....you would make an amazing councillor to help others facing the desolate problems you faced....

    I am sure that your life ( and your friend. ) can only get better day by day....your posts touched soooo many people. Both in there sadness and courage....

    Never, ever, ever forget that you are a good, kind, caring, intelligent and an exceptional human being....

    Please keep us updated young man, you will be in my thoughts and prayers always,.. big, big hugs to you. Please take good care of yourself today and everyday....DEIRDRE xxxx

    • ozzie1961
      ozzie1961 deirdre._03652

      Posted

      Dear Deidre ,

      I am so grateful for all those uplifting and kind words, you never fail me .

      Your my freind and comrade for life.

      And we need more Deidres and more Elizabeths and more of the many that bring us together and unite us in love and real compassion in this home we can walk into at any time of the day and still find the same thing.

      many hugs

      Thanks again

      PJ

  • elizabeth20203
    elizabeth20203 ozzie1961

    Posted

    Hello Ozzie,  I have been thinking about you and praying. I am glad you have felt calmer recently. You have had some difficult days and I was very worried about you as you know. Glad your now getting some support from the housing advocate and that your situation will start to improve. Will be thinking of you tomorrow and Wednesday with your hospital appointments. Keep strong, keep hoping for a satisfactory solution.

    Hugs Elizabeth xx   smile

    • ozzie1961
      ozzie1961 elizabeth20203

      Posted

      Dear Elizabeth even with all your own situation u are so SOLID and GROUNDED when it comes to being a true committed and such a loving , compassionate person.

      I adore your loving spirit and I know where that comes from.

      Hugs

      Phil

    • elizabeth20203
      elizabeth20203 ozzie1961

      Posted

      Morning Phil, thanks for your kind words. Thinking of you today as you go to the hospital. I am sorry to read about Albert deciding to not take his exams due to the stress of your situation. These neighbours that started this off have caused so much pain for you both, and it's affecting Alberts future too.I hope one day they will search their hearts and realise what they have done.

      I do have compassion for others as you do too Phil, compassion cannot be learnt it comes from the heart, as others on this site have shown. You are a lovely caring and unique person, even in your own crisis you have helped others on this site, you are selfless and think of others. When you have been rock bottom people here have tried to give you

      hope and pray for you. Even r99925 didnn't know your situation and sent you a message saying he felt for you and you sent him a beautiful reply. Take care sending blessingss and hugs.

      Elizabeth xx    smile

    • ozzie1961
      ozzie1961 elizabeth20203

      Posted

      Good morning Elizabeth

      just out of bed, my brian doesnt work well when i wake up .

      Thanks kindly again for your lovely morning message

      Ill be back on line after the appt at the hospital

      Have a wonerful day.

      Hugs

      Phil

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