Advice needed.

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Hi my name is Kayleigh and I am new to the forum. I have suffered with panic attacks since I was 18; I am now 28. I have tried councilling and citalopram, but both have not really helped. In the beginning years I had a habit of calling an ambulance every time I had an attack, but now I seem to seclude myself. I have tried all sorts of things to try and get rid or just cope, but nothing seems to work. I have a 4 year old who I try to hide my attacks from and I am now pregnant with my second child so cannot take any medication. Everyone I try to talk to doesn't understand how difficult it is to live with the fear of an attack. Any advice would be greatly appreciated.

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  • Posted

    Have you tried breathing techniques when you have an anxiety attack.

    Find somewhere quiet to relax, breath in through your nose slowly, hold your breath then breath out through your mouth.  This is a relaxation technique. Also using a paper bag over your mouth will slow rapid breathing down when an attack occurs.


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  • Posted

    I have tried breathing techniques. Sometimes it works for me and other times not so much. My problem seems to be that my thoughts run away with themselves, especially if I have an attack in public. Even though I try to visualise happy things etc sometimes I just can't seem to concentrate on anything positive. The only thing that seems to calm me down is distraction methods, but I know that they aren't a good idea as I need to face the fear. I'm just so tired of this struggle. I just wish I could conquer it nice and for all, but it just seems impossible. 
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  • Posted

    As long as you continue to fight it or try to get rid of it it will worsen. Anxiety is a fight/flight system, therefore any kind of fighting attitude or running away attitude will aggravate it. Acceptance is the only thing that works. You do not have to 'face your fear' heroically. All it requires is acceptance that this is what your body and mind are doing at the moment. It will not harm you in any way. Accept that you are temporarily in an anxious state and relax. No harm can come to you. It just feels horrible and uncomfortable for a while. It doesn't mean anything. It can occur for no reason or because your nerves are tired and need a rest. it can have multiple and strange effects in your body but nothing that will harm you. mentally, the brain goes into overdrive. These are not your thoughts. They are the thoughts of anxiety and he/she/it usually says the same thing every time ie. 'O my God, this is a really terrible thing' (which it isn't), 'I must be going mad' (which you are not),' I'm going to die' (which you will not), ' there is something terribly wrong with me' (which there isn't). In other words, it catastrophises everything, makes things up and then panics about them!  These thoughts need not be feared. Thoughts have no power. They are just thoughts. They are just the results of a tired brain. They do not indicate any kind of mental health problem. They are just the constant babble that comes out of the brain when it is anxious. Just let them babble on their nonsense but don't believe them. While your brain is in an anxious state it will talk complete bullshit. Don't believe a word of it. None of it is true. When you come out of your anxious state, your brain will return to normal service.

    Other people dont understand because they have not had the experience. I do not know what it feels like to have tinnitus because I have never experienced it. They need educating. There are various anxiety websites that have leaflets and info about the condition. Perhaps you could download some and give to family/friends. I think the NHS does as well. Or get a therapist to explain it to them if a possibility (people believe it more if it comes from an 'expert').

    You are probably putting yourself under a lot of pressure trying to pretend to your 4 year old that mummy is ok. Actually, mummy is ok. There is nothing wrong with her except she thinks there is something wrong with her. It's just anxiety, a very common condition. Try to be compassionate to yourself. You are having a horrible time. Be kind to yourself. Look after yourself. Let yourself of the hook and stop beating yourself up. You have done fabulously well in surviving this horrible condition with the added stress of a small child to look after. You should be congratulated. Allow yourself to be a 'good enough' mum for the time being. We dont have to be perfect at everything! Be kind to yourself. Wishing you a big hug.


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