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Posted , 8 users are following.

Fairy28
Fairy28

 Me again. Don't know about anyone else but I think this awful nasty phase should be classed as a proper illness and I think doctors should give us all long term sick notes so we don't have to struggle on working. The last thing we need to worry about is money when we feel so ill all the time. I know it's not much but even a small amount would help so we didn't have to struggle to even get up in the mornings, why are we just expected to struggle on and on its so hard to even open the car door and drive down the road - anyone else ? xx

5 likes, 41 replies

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  • gentleballads
    gentleballads Fairy28

    Posted

    completely agree lou

    just like maternity leaves are sanctioned and considered ok we should also be allowed to get paid leave

    yesterday i read someone say on fb to get this bill sanctioned in court MLAA - or something....good idea

    but which doctor will certify ? and till how long ?

    but 

    • Fairy28
      Fairy28 gentleballads

      Posted

      Exactly - who and how ! As far as I'm concerned this is an illness just like any other. If we could have some pressure taken off by being allowed to stay home when we feel so so ill it would make such a difference, as usual too much pressure on women on so many levels.
  • unico31026
    unico31026 Fairy28

    Posted

    My feelings exactly except that my anxieties have got so bad that I can't even drive anymore!
    • Fairy28
      Fairy28 unico31026

      Posted

      I symlathise with you, I can't count the times ive had to pull over and be sick and that's the truth, violent headaches with nausea .........having to face the responsibilities of work and worrying about money is just another added pressure we just do not need 😰
  • ellacraig
    ellacraig Fairy28

    Posted

    Yes no and maybe...

    When at 38 I asked my mum (who I never grew up with btw) about menopause and she said to me " Oh yeh I was EASILY started at your age and DONE by 50..." And that HER mum was the same.. I thought "ohhhhhh NOW I KIND OF GET IT..

    But then my work mate tells me " oh my best mates wife got diagnosed with menopause at 28!"....,

    So yeh... In this toxic world as much as it Should be a recognisable medical condition... Sadly how is it possible?

  • ellacraig
    ellacraig Fairy28

    Posted

    Also my sister in laws sister got diagnosed meno in her 20's...

    Sadly it's just another thing going against us women sad as it is in my country they don't like hiring women with primary school aged children because we are a flight risk.. I was all but told this at the last interview I went too.. The employer said said to me " we generally only hire older people because..." .... Geez Louise I'm only 39, imagine if I threw in " oh btw I'm going through early menopause too"...

    Tell you what it ain't easy being a woman as you all know... sad

    • Fairy28
      Fairy28 ellacraig

      Posted

      thats just so awful - it sometimes feels like so much is against us and it's all such a hard fight isn't it. So much discrimination and ageism no wonder we are all so mentally and physically challenged on so many levels x
  • metamorphed
    metamorphed Fairy28

    Posted

    the sad truth is that we're still in the dark ages as regards menopause.  I discovered this as you all probably did, only when I hit this phase.  I discovered that doctors had basic knowledge of it and ran loads of tests and I was deemed healthy and fit for work.  As you know, hormone changes have a devastating effect on your body and I was never as sick in my whole life. 

    Women are different and some women have very difficult pregnancies and likewise, some women have very difficult menopause.  Yet, a difficult pregnancy will allow time off work and care and attention, which of course it should, but difficult menopause does not get the attention it deserves.

    There is not enough known about the physical effects and women should be aware that they may have a difficult time with it and to be prepared.  

    Perhaps, 'Saving for your Menopause', should replace 'Saving for your Retirement' because the financial cost and financial loss, we are just not prepared for it AT ALL!  Thanks Lou for this discussion neutral

     

    • Fairy28
      Fairy28 metamorphed

      Posted

      Oh gosh yes you are spot on ! We should maybe be made aware of all this when we are younger, little did we know what may be ahead. Most of us get taken up with raising children when we're young, household tasks, work etc etc and I know I didn't even give this a thought in fact I probably thought looking back in hindsight that I would be young and we'll forever ! Huh what did I know........because mum and nan had an easy time it was never discussed. Well I have two daughters both grown up now and my god don't they know about it, in fact my eldest (29) came to visit , I didn't need to say anything she just put her arm round me and said ' oh mum' , she heard my creaky knees and how pale I look and she actually said I shouldn't be working.....I don't think any of us should have to work going through this, and yes we are totally in the dark ages x
    • jamie50513
      jamie50513 metamorphed

      Posted

      Metamorphed you raise a very good point. When it comes to meno we are still in the dark ages. It's sad that there is such a lack of knowledge. As I had no clue of the effects on the body due to hormones and neither does any of my friends or women I used to work with. I feel like some still don't believe that it could be so difficult. The women in my family were having difficulties with it but didn't know what it was due to the lack of my grandmothers and great grandmothers having no knowledge of it either. It's one terrible cycle. But I am gaining as much knowledge as I can so that my daughters can be informed. I hope they breeze through it, but if not, I will have hopefully prepared them with enough knowledge to know whats going on with their bodies. I wish I had saved up for meno, I never figured I wouldn't be working because of it. I need to go back as I need the money, but still not quite comfortable.
    • metamorphed
      metamorphed Fairy28

      Posted

      your daughter is right.  It is impossible to do a days work in this state.  I developed a stiff shoulder and severe pain in arm and shoulder. I insisted to my doctor that it was hormonal but he sent me for xrays and testing with a rheumatologist. I told both of them that overnight I had become unable to do everyday tasks and simple lifting and reaching was agony and that knew for a fact it was oestrogen dropping that was causing it.  When the hormones started to balance out the pain started to go.  But, they couldn't find anything that was causing it and it was put down to anxiety, but they were real, physical symptoms and I was left trying to carry out everyday tasks and work in real, physical pain.  thankfully, this has settled for me now, but it took 6 months and i would have loved for it to be acknowledged and not had to struggle on in tears. x
    • Zigangie
      Zigangie metamorphed

      Posted

      I've got a shoulder like that now, even reaching out to the left to pick up a toothpick hurt so much earlier.

      Now this evening cystitis making itself known again. I've been trying to hold it off with cranberry tablets and juice. It doesn't seem to be working though.

    • jamie50513
      jamie50513 metamorphed

      Posted

      Funny you mentioned the shoulder. I have now developed pain in my left shoulder. Never had problems before with my shoulders. I'm not even going to the doctors for it. Tired of going around in circles.
    • metamorphed
      metamorphed jamie50513

      Posted

      zigangie and jamie, it's always good to get things checked out but I know what you mean about going round in circles.  I had no injury so they couldn't help me.  It was hormones.  If it gets worse you may need painkillers but like all these symptoms it just started to get better on its own.  They would keep sending you for physio and acupuncture but until the hormones settle, none of this really works.  oh the joys!
    • jamie50513
      jamie50513 metamorphed

      Posted

      I don't think there's nothing left on me to check out. I had some many tests done, I was surprised I had blood left for them to take. I do know what you mean about getting it checked out though. I am learning that as hormones stop acting a fool, symptoms just seem to go away. Until they settle down completely I see they make an off and on appearance. All I can do is try not lose it in the process. I swear sometimes I have already lost half my mind.
    • metamorphed
      metamorphed jamie50513

      Posted

      it's a trying time for women, it really is.  you really have to use all your strength to get through it. You go round in a daze trying to find someone who understands but it seems that all around you people just don't get it... until you find others in the exact same boat on forums like this one.  we're so lucky to have this site cheesygrin
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