alone and sinking

Posted , 6 users are following.

I feel like i am suffering from depression , i have no idea where to get help. I moved house 4 months ago and i am terriffied of going to a new doctors. I lost my mum 4 years ago and dad 2 years ago, i have never  recovered. i have a 2 and 3 year old, they kept me going. I must seem like a normal mum to others at the toddler and parent groups i go to but inside i am sinking. I cant put it all on my husband when he works a long day, its not fare. I have repetaive thoughts for the past 3 years now, usually at the anger i have towards my husbands family at not supporting me when my parents died. I can not stand my husbands mother looking after my children because of this and i feel out of control when she has them. Its the only break i getI moved to irland 10years ago and after making friends i moved to different part which i know people at the toddler groups but have no friends. that is why i am writing this, what sort of person am i . i have no one to ask help from i feel pathetic . i was home in england at the weekend, i wasnt myself but no one noticed. i dont know what to do

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6 Replies

  • Posted

    hi hunnie, you must make an appointment with your gp ane explain how you are feeling, you have done the right thing coming on here, ask gp for any groups in your area with like minded people, there is help out there, goodluck x
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  • Posted

    I agree with julie1111: you at least owe it to yourself, and I suspect that your husband and kids will appreciate the effect of a positive move like talking to a GP, even if you don't tell them about it immediately.

    Good luck!

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  • Posted

    I fully understand how you feel.

    Is it possible you did a ver good job of hiding your grief?

    I moved 16 months ago to an area I didn't know and not knowing anyone. I live alone.

    Its been so isolating.

    You go through many stages when dealing with the loss of someone you love. Anger, denial, sadness, why?

    It's a normal part if grieving.

    You are doing this alone, please try and talk to your husband, share your feelings.

    Remember you both agreed to love without condition when you married.

    Your husband may be worried but not speaking of it in case he upsets you.

    Please try. Xxx

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  • Posted

    Please go and see your gp golddie. You need to say how you are feeling. You are grieving for your terrible loss and you need to talk to someone about this and you need support. Your gp can arrange counselling for you. This can be for depression, anxiety or for the grief you are going through. Going to see your gp will be the first step in getting yourself the help and support that you need. At the surgery, they may also be able to tell you about groups for people in similar situations to yourself. You mention toddler groups that you attend and say you have no friends there. Once you start to feel a bit better (and you will I promose) would it be possible to reach out to some of the other mums/carers/dads there and try to make friends there? Years ago I didnt know anyone in my village until I had my children then I joined the toddler group and eventually I was able to make friends because suddenly I had lots in common with other people (the children). You will probably find that many of the others at the toddler group have problems that will be happy to share with you and will be happy to support you with yours once they get to know you. Please dont feel that you are alone, most people have awful problems that seem insurmountable but just need a little support.

    Very best wishes to you and take care xx

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  • Posted

    your parents death has had a big impact on you and you may still not be over the grieving process.  I would accept help from the husbands' parent even if you resent it as they are trying do make it easier for you.  It takes time to talk over a loved ones departure and maybe a bereavement counsellor would help you.


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  • Posted

    I am glad you are posting here as we understand how you feel, and can be supportive.  I am so sorry you are feeling so poorly at the moment.  I thinkj most of us try to hide from others how we feel.  But it is times like this we need support. 

    I understand you do not want to see a new doctor, but it could help.  Perhaps even talking to your huband will help lift the load.  You did marry in sickness in health.  I am sure if this was happening to him you would want to know and be there for him. 

    It is difficult when we feel so alone.  I am elderly and live alone but I get anxious.  I have had depression for many many years, but had to ask my family for support.  Don't be ashamed of telling how you feel.  Hopefully you will make friends soon.  Feeling alone is so isolating.

    Keep posting as we are your friends.

    Take care my dear.

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