always been overwhelmed

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Since as long as I can remember I have never seemed to get all the things done that I feel I need to/want to...I see people living independent lives all around me and then there's me...blustery. I get going quite well and then the next pre-crisis hits. Managing holistic health conditions just seems always too much...the complexities and inter-relations...any advice would be very welcome. It's the biggest thing that gets me down.

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  • Posted

    Hi nalia,

    I think I understand what you're saying. I feel overwhelmed a lot of the time too. In fact, pretty much constantly. It effects every area of my life. There is just always SOMETHING. Always. Has left me feeling like a complete failure as I haven't achieved anything I thought I would. Everyday is just hard work, from start to finish And I have no idea how to function like everyone else. So, I understand what you're going through. Here if you need someone to talk to. ūüėä

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    • Posted

      Thanks so much...I was so nervous starting this, my first discussion. I am sorry to hear too, that you feel in at the deep end. I'm frantically treading water most of the time! You are so right. Once the pool floods, the water seeps everywhere...it's like woah...different types of overflows: cascading unexpectedly, when the waterfalls had looked, so pretty at first! Then their pressure surges become gargantuan~in like; how many seconds?!eek

      I can resonate with what you said. There always sems to be some snake rattling it's tail away, threatening to bite and sometimes doing so in quick succession. Occassionally an antivenom is found quickly and erm...other times...it takes awhile! Lol, didn't realise that I had so much subconscious imagery waiting to be expressed! It is hard to relax when the work load of life, is so mahoosive- I agree. One is left- with those omg - what the hobbit happened (?) ~feelings of failiure creeping up stealthily.

      I hope~ that you feel ~ that you have acheived things that you thought you couldn't though. It would be nice ~to have those long sleeps and wake up calm most of the time! Your words are very pertinent. How do others function under such chronic and acute stress? I am warmly appreciative of your time taken to reply to me...as to connect when you feel like you do and feel permanently snowed under, means a lot to me. Here too, if you need to share a life-raft! cool

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  • Posted

    Hi what you see around you is people doing exactly the same as you and managing.   I am sure to the outside world that's what you look like too.  There is a myth that other people are perfect and coping very well and it's only you who aren't.   That is actually not true,  it's just an illusion.

    I do feel for you having health conditions can't be easy - but maybe you are too hard on yourself and trying to do too much?  Try and concentrate on the things you are able to do and not the things you aren't.  That way you will feel a sense of pride rather than negativity.   In other words focus on the positive and pat yourself on the back when you do achieve something. 

    I don't think anyone achieves everything they want or need to let alone someone with health problems.  You can only do your best and best is best isn't it?   You don't need to compare yourself with others,  only yourself.  x

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    • Posted

      Thank you for your candid reply and reflections. It can be hard to see the wood for the trees when anxieties strike. I do tend to lack empathy, unless I have actually experienced something personal that I can relate to in someone else & I guess that isolates me a lot. I shall have to work on skills to do with that. I know that support groups help a lot. To rediscover connection with the greater human condition, by listening to others. I like your words about myth and illusions and I will apply them, when my maelstromming takes over and I need to cognitise!

      Thank you for your insight, intuition and informed opinion. I think that through your understanding and communication, it has helped me to see that yes perhaps I am berating myself and not seeking support in the most constructive action based ways that would be more beneficial. So help can be replace procrastination and excess worry. I shall celebrate my proactivities more, and whirl up my way out of the stagna rather than spiral down to the magma. That does help one to glow more and then have more energy for the next set of tasks. Yes, I do need to know how to love myself more and appreciate my being/nature. 

      You're very wise. You have very beneficial tonal structure in your choice of terms. You empathise and yet also place observation and example so well, for example particularly around the boggy rut that my mindplace gets in!  I had never come across the extension to; 'can only do one's best', that is: "best is best!" before-love it!  Cheers - I shall work with myself better from now on. X Really chuffed with the answers here and space it creates in myself - thanks guys for your great replies!biggrin

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    • Posted

      Hi Same here - I think its called Anxiety Disorder. And its definitely disordered. I'm competant in a lot of areas but master in none.

      I start a project and then another interest kicks in and diverts energy into looking at that idea. I look like a seismograph during a task! straight line then getting more and more wavy moving from one thing to another untill i'm just moving sideways and not forward.

      I'm sure in the old days this had a use (maybe look at the overall running of the tribe or something), but now days there isn't any use. It's so hard, but I have to try to force myself to concentrate on one task and complete it, even if it is not perfect. (another weakness - want to keep picking at it untill it's perfection, and never satisfied)

      'best is best' sounds like a good motto.. "Done is better than perfect" is one I should be using.

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    • Posted

      My, nalia I can feel my head swelling as I type smile  Thank you for your kind words and it's great to know that it has helped a bit. 

      What I wrote to you is based on my personal experience and I do understand where you are coming from.  Been there,  got the video,  even got the b.....y t-shirt smile 

      Thanks for the compliments - you make me feel good about myself. smile

      Onwards and upwards love.   Bev xx

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