Am hanging by a piece of thread

Posted , 5 users are following.

Hi guys this the first time I'm posting so please be gentle with me. I have a really big problem with how I look. To me I look completely normal but to other people I look different.  I am a  woman, I love being a woman but it appears to people I look like a man. This has caused me so much problems on that  don't see what people see in me that is so different.  People just hate me for no reason or they make fun of me. I pretend it doesn't affect me but lately I've been feeling suicidal, I am on depression and anxiety medication but it doesn't seem to help. I have the worst neighbours who live can hear making horrible comments about my looks. Whenever like walk in my flat , they will imitate my footsteps or when I'm in bed they bang on my floor. I cannot face the wored outside and then come home to more pain and agony. I cannot take it anymore.  As long write I can hear them complaining about me. I don't know what to do. I can't take it anymore. I'm tired, my body and mind are worn out, I have nothing  left.

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10 Replies

  • Posted

    Hi Maz.  I know exactly what you mean because I get very much the same comments.  I am a woman but don't look especially feminine and I have had quite a lot of flak over it.   What I do now is when I go out I try and look as feminine as possible and wear full make up.  I also keep my hair quite long and never never cut it short.   I resent having to do that but if it keeps the comments down well it is worth it.   

    I also keep some nice insults for people who slag me off like that ie 'have you looked in the mirror recently?'   'You can talk - you are no oil painting are you'?   Or even 'p..s  off'.   

    I have even been 'accused' a lot of being a lesbian which I am not.  I don't have a problem with gay people but they mean it as an insult.   

    Unfortunately there are a lot of nasty people in the world who spot what they see as a weakness then exploit it for their own amusement.    I have learned to stay away from people like that as much as possible and stay with those who do like and accept me.

    As for your awful neighbour they are d....h.....ds.   Can you move?   It is awful being made fun of and they obviously lead such sad lives don't they?   

    I do emphasise with you very much and hope I have helped a bit.  

    Bev xx

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    • Posted

      Thanks a lot for that Bev. I am in the same boat. I love being feminine and dressing up but lately I just wear jeans and a simple top. I feel like if I dress up they will call me a transvestite, which they already do. I am not as brave as you are and as a result I am afraid of being around people and so I isolate myself. Thank you for your help.
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    • Posted

      Maz.

      I am a woman and look very womanly. The hangups I have about myself and my body you wouldn't believe.

      The thing is,you yourself feels that you look ok,that there is nothing wrong with the way you look so please don't take the slightest notice of narrow minded fools who have nothing better to do than make another persons life miserable. How do you know that they are not just jealous? 

      They are bullies who obviously need to hit out at others because it stops them having yo look inwards at themselves. They are nasty individuals. 

      Please do not let them pull you down Maz. It's them with the problem,not you.

      If you are in a council house. Make a appointment and tell them you are being harassed and are frightened. They will then have to place you in a safe place and find you a property as soon as they can. Or if you are brave enough to report your neighbours,then do it!!!

      You do whatever makes you feel happy..if you want to dress up to the nines,then do it!!!You deserve to shine so hold your head up,walk tall and show them that they can do and say what they want but they will not dim your sparkle xxx

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    • Posted

      Hi Maz no I am not braver than you.  I am just older smile   I suffered for many years before I decided I wasn't going to take it any more.   If someone slags me off I slag them off back.   

      No one has a right to have a go at you Maz so get angry and react.   Otherwise folk think you are weak and they can say what they want to you and about you.  Have more confidence in yourself and the right to be who you are.   

      I had a good one once.  I was with my sister in a pub getting er..well bladdered and laughing a lot.   I went up to the bar to get another drink and this guy said to me suspiciously  'You 2 are getting along very well together'.   I looked at him and said  'That is my sister'   Are you accusing us of incest?   The look on his face was a picture lol.  

      Don't get upset - get angry!   Or humerous - they both work,  

      Bev x

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  • Posted

    Hey Maz

    What I can suggest is that you get your safe place worked out first - your flat.

    Aussie has FairTrading.com.au for resolution of things like tenant / neighbour behaivour. Perhaps someone can suggest what it is for where you are?

    Diarise behaivour in a separate diary.

    {Time} "copying footsteps" or just write "CF" if its very common, and put a note at the front of the diary explaining what CF means.

    Send the diary in (or better, a certified copy) as part of the complaint.

    cheers!

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    • Posted

      I have been in the same situation with an ex neighbour.

      I had to involve the housing association,

      Environment Health and the Police.

      You must keep a diary.

      Time

      Date

      Incident

      How it affected you.

      What was said " word for word"

      If you are verbally used outside or in it

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    • Posted

      Well Done Linda!

      I knew there would be some in the same boat unfortunate as it is rolleyes

      I'll note your points just in case someone else needs it (or me).

      BTW i'm also pressured as i have to leave where I am as soon as possible ie by Christmas. It is causing a LOT of stress = depression ie "I'm boxed in" "where do I go from here?" "why am I being given no options?" "am I being punished for something?"

      I am having to look at rent vs buy, and then maybe have to relocate (and then rent/buy) if I get a new job, cause my library job is shrinking as most goes online / digital. Might even have to go interstate.

      So I am having to spend all saturday each week in the Sydney housing market. Don't know where to go. Don't know what job to get.

      ## BUT on the positive, I've found that going looking for a new place has opened up things.. ie I've gone to suburbs I have never been to and they didn't attack me, people were nice and helped me with directions etc.

      So I'm actually thinking I'll come out of this with a positive.

      * Moral, sometimes to improve yourself, you have to move /change. smile

      So Maz maybe you are heading for a change where you have to look at what / where you are, and using that Concrete Foundation, to go to the next place in your life.

      Cheeze

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    • Posted

      Computer went down sorry.

      If you speak to the housing and express your concerns, keep a record of everything.

      I moved in the end and happily have no

      more problems.

      It may be the answer... To move.

      Its not fair but your happiness to more important

      Xx

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    • Posted

      Are you signed up for a housing association?

      If you are becoming homeless its likely they owe you a duty of care, please contact them and as many as you can.

      What a horrible time just before Christmas.

      But

      A new future lies ahead of you.

      I made a new life in a lovely quiet neighbours.

      My last neighbour set his flat on fire and myself and pets were in the flat above. He did it on purpose sadly.

      Make a new life.. I did... So I am proof it can be done xx

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