Am i letting my best friend help me too much?

Posted , 3 users are following.

Okay so, i have depression, anxiety, bulimia and signs of OCD, i currently see a therapist for IPT, mainly for the depression but have been refered to an eating disorder unit for a consultation for my bulimia. I have this one friend who has been there for me from the start and was the person who actually helped me to reach out for help in the first place. She is always there for me and i tell her pretty much everything. Last week i was feeling really suicidal and had a few phone calls with her late at night where i was just crying and didnt know what to do. After these phone calls had happened she went and spoke to a teacher at school who supports me with my mental health, to say she was really worried about me and told her what had happened with the phone calls. Basically im worried that im telling my friend too much and putting too much pressure on her which might be too hard on her and might be really stressing her out? But at the same time she is my best friend and i do need her and she is the only person who i fully trust. Does anyone have any advice because my friend is so wonderful i dont want to be putting her under too much pressure and stress.

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5 Replies

  • Posted

    Hey annabel,

    I am really sorry to hear that you are going through this at the moment as no one deserve that.

    The fact that you are putting so much confidence in someone is really encouraging, usually people who are depressed try to hide their emotions. Did your friend give you any signs that she is been pressured by you? Maybe she is genuinly worried about you and asked another person (the teacher) for help. Since you already tell her everything, why not open up to her and ask her if you are stressing her out?

    Please keep talking to us as we will never be stressed out, and try to stay strong during this journey, I myself face pretty much the same expect I have no one to talk to. Reply to us please

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    • Posted

      Thank you kun, i mean the fact that she spoke to a teacher to say she was worried about me kind of implied to me that she felt it was too much to deal with on her own, do you understand what i mean? 

      Im really sorry to hear that you are also struggling, i know it is the hardest thing to do but if there is someone in your life who you trust or think could help/ support you, i would say you should try and talk to them because honestly me opening up and getting help was honestly the best decision of my life. I find it hard to say things in person so i wrote a letter explaining how i felt which was how i first started talking about my feelings as i found it a million times easier to write it down. 

      Like you said to me, keep replying on here as we understand how difficult it is to open up and ask for help, so until you feel able to, we will all be here to support you. Maybe we could be recovery buddies and try and fight this together as you said you were going through very similar things?

      Hope you are doing okay today, and thinking of you! X

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    • Posted

      Also (i forgot to add) i see a therapist so maybe i dont need to be so open with my friend? I feel like im being really self centred if you know what i mean?? (Sorry if this seems like bragging as u just said u have no one to talk to i dont mean it like that at all) x
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    • Posted

      Hey annabel,

      Really glad you replied, there is nothing to brag about when it comes to depression so no worries at all.

      I understand, so you are feeling that your friend is sort of throwing or shifting some of the weight on someone else as she can't take more of it. While this might be true id really touch base with her to see if thats true.

      I don't where you are from, but over here deperession is something unheard of, its like if you are deperessed no one knows what to say hence the reason why I have no one to talk to and no therapist to see since I dont have an insurance card. However I am really glad you and others are here so I can share some with you and as you suggested I'll be more than happy to be recovery buddies =)

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    • Posted

      Yeah, i spoke to my friend about it last night and she asured me that i wasnt putting too much pressure on her. Thing is though i dont think she would say if i was because she wouldnt want to offend me (not that it would). 

      I am really sorry to hear that you dont have any acess to support, that must be so hard. But like you said thank godness we are on all on here to support eachother. I am from England and i got lucky with my referral’s as they dont refer many people as its all done on the NHS! 

      Thank you for your reply! And i hope we can keep in touch. Keep us updated on how you are doing, and never be afraid to ask us for help!

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