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I think it is because I am scared of how bad my anxiety is and feel I have no control over it at the moment but I become obsessed with this fear, if I do something to distract myself it goes away but as soon as I am sat still it comes back.
It's worse when my panic is really high, this morning before I went out I was panicky about going out and had the thought that I would get psychosis or that I may even already have it and that made me panic even more especially because I know the mental health team are useless and I don't feel I would get help if I did have it.
Is this a common fear when anxiety is extremely high? More to the point how would I know if I did have it?
My hubby said I am not acting like I have it, just acting like someone with high anxiety and agoraphobia and that I am worrying a lot over everything but I get really scared.
I recently increased my meds, it was supposed to be increased at night and in the morning, I increased the night dose but then read on the internet that diazepam can cause psychosis so I can't bring myself to increase the morning dose because I am too scared now.
I have been on it for years as many of you know so should feel at ease about it but since reading that it's really freaked me out.
I am so sick of being scared, now I have something else to worry about
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