Posted , 7 users are following.
It's been a few weeks since I last made a post, or maybe it's been a few months, I don't quite remember much about anything anymore.
Since my last post, I said I'd try and go with a better outlook on life and try to just survive through it until I go to uni in just under a years time, as Uni will be a new beginning in a new city. Since then, things have only gotten worse.
Work: People there seem to be against me for no real reason, and I just cant win with anything I do. It both tires me out mentally and physically and really makes me feel down.
Friends: I said last time that I had no real friends left, and that hasnt changed. They've nearly all left me for whatever reason. I'd say I have two real friends left, and I told one of them everything that was making me feel so depressed, and they didn't help - simply left me to it without any real input. The other friend is trying to help, but it's hard for us to meet up and do anything since we live cities apart and we both work.
My life has gotten worse, and my drinking has only gotten worse too. I drink when I wake up before work, when I get home from work, and throughout the day on my time off. I drink because I dont feel anything other than complete desolation and sadness, or just numbness.
I use the term "depression" perhaps wrongly. I've always thought I was depressed since it all began, but for the past few months I havent felt anything. I mean, I literally dont feel any emotions other than either complete sadness or complete numbness. The loneliness is killing me. I drink because I think it might help me feel something, but it only makes me worse.
I'm posting this because, again, I need to get it off my chest. I don't expect anyone to take the time to offer help, hell, I don't think theres much that can really be said to me that'll help other than whats already been said. I just feel completely lost again, and I just don't want to go on anymore.
Thanks for reading.
0 likes, 10 replies
gillian0503 sam1231
Posted
Gillian xx
sam1231 gillian0503
Posted
Thanks for the reply
charles67285 sam1231
Posted
sam1231 charles67285
Posted
Di25 sam1231
Posted
i understand that drinking blocks things out and helps temporarily but you need the right medication to help you I know how you feel don't give up and go and see your gp Things will get better and you will be a stronger person for it xxx
sam1231 Di25
Posted
nicki16559 sam1231
Posted
sam1231 nicki16559
Posted
AmericanGirl sam1231
Posted
sam1231 AmericanGirl
Posted
Join this discussion or start a new one?
New discussion Reply