Anxiety and Depersonalization?

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So, long story short I've been dealing with anxiety and panic attacks since 2010. They come and go. I've had horrible, horrible times with it. I have taken ativan for it, and tried lexapro. The lexapro gave me extreme headaches and made it to where I couldn't eat a bite. So I've stopped everything. It all kicked back up with a bad case of what doctors think was labyrinthitis, my left ear still rings to this day. It has gotten better until just this morning. I've been sleeping but not well, my fiance and I just had a Baby girl and unfortunately I got laid off so im looking for work. We have a roof over our head and everything is done otherwise. The day we got in the hospital I couldn't sleep and had mini attacks all night waking me up. Finally got sleep but still felt off. Then this morning I wake up and I feel like I'm constantly dreaming, still do right now and it's 5pm at night. Kind of dizzy, visions off, feels like I'm not real, or that something bad will happen. Not sure exactly what. I'm pretty tired but when I try to close my eyes i get very anxious. I'm trying to talk myself into believing it's just anxiety but it's hard. It was coming and going this morning and now it just feels like my head clogged, my ears ringing bad, and I'm just not real. I've heard of Depersonalization and derealization but dang... Is this Whats going on? Anyone else feel this way before? I don't have insurance seeing as we just moved from az to mi so I can't are a doctor and my heartbeat and temp is fine.. A little help please? sad

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  • Posted

    yes i feel exactly like u do right now ;( its scary and horrible
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  • Posted

    It sounds like Anxiety, it can do many things to you. The Ativan should give you relief but you should only take it for a short period as it can become addictive! Valium is a better alternative to Ativan as it is easier to come off of because it has a longer half life. But for the short term the Ativan is fine.

    I'm no doctor, but it does sound like this is all anxiety! Please try and relax and know that you are not going crazy and it's just the anxiety.

    And try and see a doctor as soon as you can to help you.

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  • Posted

    I have felt much like you describe. I've been having a rough time since Thanksgiving. Been to the doctor several times, all tests are normal. It's anxiety and it sucks! This is the worst I've felt in three years and I went back on mess. Fluoxetine. My fog is starting to lift after the awful start up side effects.
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  • Posted

    Dear Afflicted,

    Where ever and what ever you have dealt with concerning your panic attacks, I have been there 100 fold. I was brought up in a highly conservative, emotionally restrictive household and started having attacks when I was around 13 years old... I had multiple attacks in the same day for years. As you are experiencing, it takes over your life in some really odd and scary ways and pretty much wrecks your life.

    I barely made it through High School and working jobs was always a nightmare. I had some therapy for a couple years when I was 15, but no meds. The psychiatric community hadn't even defined panic attacks back then. Eventually, I happened upon a huge newspaper article on Panic Disorder and it set me on a path if getting help, but even that was uneven and in many ways in a nightmare on its own. I live in L.A. and was one of the first trial patients given Xanax. It worked wonders, but I wasn't told it was highly addictive. The whole thing is horrible to deal with and you feel like some screwed up alien being from another planet at times. So, I have great empathy for your predicament

    The best news is that you won't die from any of it. Finding the right meds can be tricky, and I recommend a combination of meds and therapy. Meds alone are only half helpful at the stage you're at with it all. People with anxiety disorders need to talk about their dilemma in order to help calm down.

    If you have any questions, feel free to ask!

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  • Posted

    i had your exact problem lockerby. i tried klonopin and it fixed it - but it is very dangerous to get addicted to. i also tried to take nothing after getting off klonopin and my anxiety seemed to be even worse. couldnt sleep. felt like i was dying. losing your job is probably one of the most stressful things you can go through. i had the same bad experience with ssris for 2 months but I kept trying different ones until i got to lexapro and it started to make me better after about 3 weeks. i suggest you try other ssris if you can. i never would have believed that I could function again in the world but more seratonin is exactly what I needed to help reduce my general anxiety.
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  • Posted

    This is withdrawal from the coming off the drugs!  If you have any of your drugs that you stopped, taking a tiny bit might give you relief.  Could you explain more about how you came off?  How long were you on Lexapro, at what dosage, and how did you come off?  Cold turkey or taper, and if taper than what kind of strategy?  How quickly?  Withdrawal from psych meds can mimick anxiety and depression, but worse than you ever have had before.  Plus, the derealization and ear ringing are known symptoms.  It doesn't take long for these drugs to mess you up.  I know someone on this forum who took Effexor for five days, stopped because of side effects, and felt horrible for five months after!  And the benzos, with semi-regular use can still create inter-dose withdrawal syptoms.    Reinstatement of a small amount of the Lexapro, 1/4 of the dose you were on when you stopped, may give relief.  How long have you been off both and how long have you been feeling weird?  The worst symptoms often don't set in until 2-3 months after stopping.  People usually state that they felt great for the first couple of months and then all hell broke loose.
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    • Posted

      i stopped taking citalopram cold Turkey a few months ago i didnt feel this bad till recently ;( so now im on sertraline which is zoloft i got hit with bad depression and anxiety and depersonalization hopefully ill feel better soon
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    • Posted

      Yikes, TammiToxic!  Don't cold turkey ever again!  You are probably still having withdrawal from the cit; other drugs can't really cover that up.  i hope you feel better soon!  This stuff is not to be triffled with!  It's so frustrating because we are of the belief that we take the drug, it does its thing, and if we stop taking it, it goes out of our system and then we are back to who we were before, but that is not the case!  These drugs cause actual changes in the brain that don't just bounce back easily or quickly.
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    • Posted

      You are right at the three month mark where things get really crazy!  It could go on for months before getting better. You could reinstate a fraction of what you jumped off of and see if it makes you feel better, and then do a very slow taper off of that.  I recommend you go to the Surviving Antidepressant forum and create an intro for yourself; then, folks in the community who have been in the trenches for a long time can advise you.  You can read about why it is important to do a 10% taper by going to the following link and scrolling down to the link for that topic:

      https://patient.info/forums/discuss/depression-resources-298570

      You will gradually get better, but it will take months, not days, and reinstating a small amount may be your best bet

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    • Posted

      yeah its been over 2 or 3 months my dr said its because i lost my mom rolleyes idk im looking to the positive side and no i will never taper off a ssri again ill prolly stay on the one im currently on
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    • Posted

      Hi betsy. I had been taking lexapro for 18 months at 5mg dose so half of standard and weaned off under drs intructions over a month. 2 weeks tablet every second day and 2 weeks tablet every 3rd then stopped. It is now 3 months since my last tablet and i am in despair. I cant sleep, i have day long panic attacks, i am severely depersonalized and derealized i never had depression before taking the drug but right now everything feels meaningless and i dont even feel like i exist. Ive been to countless drs in the past 2 weeks feeling this awful abd had neuro tests and blood tests all perfect. The drs assure me this can in no way be lexapro wthdrawal that its just an onset of my anxiety again but i have NEVER experienced it to this extent I can't live like this. What can i do?? Could you send me some links to others experiencing similair? Im at my wits end could this really be withdrawal?
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  • Posted

    I haven't taken anything lol. I haven't taken lexapro since may.
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