Anxiety and the time to change the negative to positive. What should you do?

Posted , 4 users are following.

Firstly ANXIETY is a natural part of your makeup. If you did not have Anxiety you would not be able to function as a human. Without it people would walk around or sit down not being able to do things that they normally do in their lives. They would resemble a lump of coal.

People with severe Anxiety can let it control their lives, rather than use it as it should be used as a fight or flight mechanism within their body to help them survive the stresses that are forced upon us by the world. We cannot change that because we have no control of laws of the land, finance, religion or life and death etc.

We do have a choice in how we live along side this. If we are stressed so have ANXIETY we must change something in what we do to reduse our feelings of ANXIETY. You might be wondering why I keep putting ANXIETY in capital letters. The reason is to remind people that ANXIETY is unique to everyone.

One chap I was seeing for severe stress and ANXIETY had a very high powered job dealing with millions of pound deals across half of the british isles. He was sent by his GP to see if we could help him.

After a long and detailed session of talking openly about how he spent his day's from when he got up in the morning and when he went to bed, we were able to establish a possible reason for his severe stress and ANXIETY.

To cut the story short, because it took quite some time talking and discussing ways that he could cut down on stress and ANXIETY.

He either got up from his own bed or got up from a bed in an hotel. He started completing his paperwork straight away and did not ever have breakfast, just a cigarette and coffee. He then jumped in his car and went to where he had his meeting with the client. This was normally an hotel and the meeting was always over lunch paid for by his firm. His clients were plied with alcohol and lots of expensive food. Money was no object as long as he clinched a deal as cheaply as possible. After his meeting he went back to his hotel and completed more paperwork. Then time was on his hands so he started to consume large amounts of alcohol and also eat more food. He worked over 90 hours a week with little sleep, poor relationships with his wife and children. He was exhausted as he had kept up with the pace of his life for at least a decade.

I was his key worker and with detailed dialogue saw things from a different angle. So was able to see how changes to his work pattern  would help reduce his stress levels and ANXIETY.

First thing was for him to have a good breakfast. Then plan his day around himself not the client. Instead of driving all the time he left his car at home and bought a rail card, or if the journey was a long one he got a business class flight paid for by his firm. One really important thing to come out of the sessions was that he never delegated and work to colleagues to reduce his work load. When it came to dealing with clients he booked a confrence suite by the side of an hotel and ordered high class food to be brought in. No alcohol was allowed at the meetings. After the meeting was finished he would stay behind and complete his paperwork. If away from home he would change into his running gear and go for a run once back at the hotel. This would then use up a lot of unused energy making him less hungry so he had a sandwich before going to bed.

Doing very small changes to his busy working life allowed him to spend much more time with his wife and children so start to enjoy his hard earned money. After 2 days talking and looking at his life,  the cloud lifted and he could see clarity that changed his life. With all his stress and severe ANXIETY he was on a slippery slope towards a heart attack or stroke.

Please make a true diary of your day to day life. Be truthfull and honest with yourself because if you can change something in your life that makes you feel that ANXIETY is taking over your life, you will start t develop a higher self esteem and self worth. Take a chance and CHANGE something so that your ANXIETY reduces. Then you can live your life to the Full. Thanks for listening PETER.


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6 Replies

  • Posted

    Hiya, I am not sure what your question is? Also, I wonder if you are interchanging worry, anxiety and panic. The three are very different.
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    • Posted

      Angel, you seem to be quite an educated person regarding mental health issues. You cannot difrenciate between the 3 because if you have worry, anxiety and panic you have the same problem. (A ROSE BY ANOTHER NAME) It is not a question to the forum it's a point of view. You might be a general nurse or a psychiatric nurse but please remember everyone practises in a different way and have very different ideas when it comes down to helping the person with the anxiety. I was practising for over 30 years and as such I have visited many planes of thought. From Bandura to De Clements and Prochaska et al. 

      Having people with severe anxiety can be a difficult illness to treat as you well know. I look at it from every angle that I can and not just go for the jugular which is read from a text book. Been there, done it and wrote the book. So that is where I am coming from Many thanks for listening, best regards Peter.

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  • Posted

    Hi Peter I kind of understand what Angel means ,you are describing someone who has stress because of a very stressful lifestyle and of course in those circumstances things need to change ,but how does someone who has a very settled lifestyle is happily retired from work and has no real stress in their life other than anxiety, panic attacks and the feelings of illness that is associated with this kind of anxiety change their lives . Most of us with anxiety know all about our illness and yet still cannot get well enough to live our lives without fear 
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    • Posted

      Hi marilyn, to have what you discribe anxiety, panic attacks and feelings of illness is quite normal, however when it becomes part of your daily life it is very distressing for you; making you feel worse. I am not sure how old you are but your symptoms could be age related, if you are sure that you have a comfortable life without stress and no money issues. Please don't take this the wrong way but people who have anxiety look towards people who also have anxiety problems and feed off of them. Some of our forum members post new postings very frequently and they get some good advice from someone who has suffered a similar problem, the next day they are so stressed out by what they have read the previous day that it has fired up a new set of anxieties.

      That's what I am trying to get across to people. You and only you have your problem. People can only empathise with you or as I have been reading sympathising with other posters. This is not going to help you. There are several ways to get rid of anxiety and panic attacks, they are talking therapies such as CBT or DBT etc Beta-Blockers (Propranolol) & (Atenolol) these reduce the amount of nor-adrenaline that in turn reduces the production of adrenaline, the fight or flight hormone and learning how to use deep muscle relaxation. Once you learn how to relax as a panic attack comes on you can deal with them and live a full and fruitfull life. Hope you are now understanding my position on anxiety and panic attacks. Good luck and best regards Peter.


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    • Posted

      Thank you mrs.wife for your kind words. I only try to listen and with my comments allow the person to have the choice to either help themself or to do their own thing, however they might take a lot longer to feel better if ever. Thank you again for your kind words, I really appreciate that. Peter.
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