Posted , 5 users are following.
Okay, Im new to all this, but hoping it will make me feel better. Id like to start by saying, all of this happened out of nowhere, i am 26, own my own business and have always been really happy and confident. Then it was almost like someone flicked a switch and literally stole my life from me. I suffer with sever anxitey, panic disorder and depersonalization disorder. Ive been struggling with this for about 3 years now, with constsant trips back and forth to my GP, where they originally thought i may have MS or temporal lobe epilepsy. Thankfully, my tests came back clear on those accounts. My GP then thought it may be severe anxiety etc (after 3 whole years of trying to find out) so she prescribed me some sertraline, and set me up with some councilling sessions. Firstly, the pills made me really sick, and made me feel like i was totally losing my mind, so i stopped taking them. She tried to put me on others, the same thing happend, so i then started to create a fear of taking medication in general in fear of them making me worse. The councilling sessions were horrendous, the woman made me feel like i was a total nutcase, and i felt like it was my last hope. I came out of the councilling session and burst into tears, i was at breaking point. 3 days later, i had a nervous breakdown. Couldnt leave the house, couldnt drive my car, couldnt do my job. 4 months later im still the same and contemplating suicide on a daily basis, not that i would, its just nice thinking about a release. i have no idea how the hell to beat this, nor do i feel ive got any fight left in me. Ive even paid for private therapy, but at £45 an hour, i cant afford to continue. I hate this, ive shut myself away from everyone, and feel like no one understands what im going through. I feel like all this isnt real and im in a dream, if only i was, it would be nice to wake up right now. Sorry for rabbling on, but it actually does feel abit better to have written how i feel. If anyone has any advice, it would be sincerly welcome. Thank you.
0 likes, 6 replies