Anxiety ruling my life.

Posted , 5 users are following.

Hi

New to the forums but have browsed the site plenty.

I'm 40 & have suffered with anxiety to various extents for several years.

Currently take Sertraline 150mg & Pregabalin 600mg daily.

My Father is terminally ill & has a limited time remaining (treatment has stopped)

I support my Mum with care, often short notice or in the middle of the night. This can range from getting my Father off the floor to helping Paramedics move him.

My Father's condition changes daily. One day ok & aware of all that is going on, the next he's saying he believes this is "the end".

I work full time & put on a mask of happiness while I'm there.

My issue today, now, is that I'm supposed to be away in Europe (I live in the UK) for the weekend for a friends Birthday. I'm terrified.

I have all my usual pre panic attack symptoms. Dry mouth, rapid heart, trembling hands, nausea, shortness of breath, stammering etc.

I can't get to see my GP until this afternoon at the earliest & this is only if there's a cancellation.

I so want to back out of the weekend away. My mind is awash with conflict. Will I be able to enjoy the weekend whilst my Father is on my mind so much? If I went would a panic attack ruin it for me (this has happened on weekends away before)? How would I explain it to my friends? Not rational I know! I've even wished there was something physically wrong with me so I had a good excuse or the GP may say I'm not fit to fly (to be honest I'm really not sure I am!)

Would welcome any thoughts or advice. I just want to shut the world away.

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6 Replies

  • Posted

    Hi 

    Welcome to the forum.

    Im sorry about your father this must be very stressful for you and this just fuels your anxiety.

    I think you should go away with your friends the break will do you good.

    Chill and try and enjoy your short time away.

    Dont let anxiety rule your life

    stay strongcool

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    • Posted

      That's a good Idea, it'll give you time to refresh your mind and take time from the UK, try to think that you will be going to a new place, so you can have a new start. 

      I really recommend you do go despite how you feel, otherwise it'll only get worse for you.

      If you feel a pre panic attack then just walk off, go somewhere and just walk around looking at everything and take deep breaths, I tend to keep busy.

      I am on 100mg Sertraline and they have not worked as well as I hoped.

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  • Posted

    Do you have a therapist or a counsellor or someone who is trained to help?
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  • Posted

    Many thanks for all the comments.

    I managed to see my GP late this afternoon. Her advice was, as suggested on here, that I should go as the break would do me good.

    As for my fear of panic attack as has happened before, the GP prescribed me Diazepam. Just a small 1 or half to take before I fly and if I do have an attack whilst away. This was followed by a definite instruction to see her again once I'm home.

    Hopefully, part of the follow up appointment will be to discuss more effective long term treatment as I really can't live my life like this. It can be quite a crippling existence sometimes as I'm sure many of you are well aware.

    As a result I'm going on the trip as planned. I'm still terrified but is reassuring to know I have something to alleviate the symptoms should they become too overwhelming.

    Many thanks for all the suggestions. I hope one day I may be in a position to return the favour. I wish you all well. I may check in over the wkend if I'm able but if not, I'll provide an update on Tues.

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  • Posted

    Trust i feel the same , I feel like anxiety is ruining my life its such a burden and its super depressing I cry all the time because despite all the testing I've had done I'm still convinced I'm dying or have some type of brain tumor or brain issue or something its so hard to deal with , you get so discouraged and want to give up so much .
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