Any suggestions welcome... inability to move!!

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I had a nervous breakdown last June, I was put on Citalapram then changed to Mirtazapine. Not sure that information is relevant...

Anyway, I have a stressful job, running the finances alone for a small business with cash flow problems, which has also lead to my own cash flow problems and originally was a significant cause of my breakdown. These problems have recently escalated and again I'm feeling really low after almost pulling myself back to normality. The owner of the company is not good at dealing with stress, so it all falls to me. 

Anyway my main problem, for around 2 months now, has been my inability to move or do anything, apart from the essentials to keep the business running. I play games on my phone to distract me and stop me panicking, whilst having the tv on. I just need some suggestions, any suggestions on how to motivate myself again. I am blamed for all the company problems, and feel constantly beaten up. I get no praise despite paying staff (except me) through periods of no sales (except me). This all sounds very petty, but I haven't been out for at least 2 months, work from home, and only ever think about this. I am so scared of having another breakdown, hence finding this site. Any advice, ideally kind advice, because I am massively over sensitive, would be appreciated. 

Sorry for sounding so petty and pathetic, I just really don't want to have to quit my job.  

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  • Posted

    Hi Louise,

    I don't have the same situation, but I do relate to not wanting to move or leave the house and get highly stressed with other people even in the smallest of situations.  

    Firstly, I'd say get out of that job as soon as you can! it's not doing you any good.  I know it's easy to say and jobs aren't growing on trees thesedays, but you will find something better.  I worked as a chef doing long hours every day 12-14 hour shifts, people getting angry, the heat, aches and pains and no life of my own.  I had to get out of it and had no work for a few months.  It was hard and i had to get help with money, but it was the best thing to do.  You can get a sick line from your doctor to even give you some time off to concentrate on finding another job, but the main thing is that you need to look after yourself before a stupid company who can't run a small business properly.  

    Have you ever thought about starting your own?  Sounds like you could.  There is plenty of advice out there and people who can help.  I'm just a fellow sufferer and I have little more than my thoughts to give you.  

    Most important...you are NOT pathetic nor are you petty for talking about things.  It's always good to talk about your problems and such a relief,, even for a short time, but it gets better I promise wink

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    • Posted

      Thank you for your reply. I do understand what you are saying, about getting a different job etc. but I do care about this company. I do have my own company too, I've just wound it down a bit to try to focus on one thing and do it well.  I just feel that the company I have put my all into now, still doesn't notice when I do well, and, I only took one month off when I had my breakdown, but this seems now to be a constant stain on my character! I was going to move abroad, which still might be a good plan. Stuck in this loop isn't working, I know that much. 
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  • Posted

    You can only try so much for others without anything in return.  That's not being selfish that's only fairness.  If your own business is suffering because of it then they don't care about you as much as you care for them and they don't deserve your time.  You have to look after yourself before you can helpp others, but I'm one to talk.  I let people walk all over me and have suffered because of it.  I had a nervous breakdown 4 years ago after a bad break-up and I was just about to start college.  Everyone noticed and kept staring at me because I couldn't keep still, but I had to try my best to get through it.  I made some frineds and completed my studies, but it was so  difficult.  All i wanted to do was hide from the world.  I didn't answer the phone, stopped reading, or doing any of the things I loved doing.  The one thing I feel the most terrible about is ignoring calls and messages from my mother.  I can't explain, but she would cause my anxiety and stress levels to go through the roof.  Some people are very intrusive and nosey it seems, but they didn't and still don't understand how much stress they can cause and that I'm quite happy not leaving the house unless I have to.   

    I've thought about looking for work away from Glasgow to get away from it all. People don't realise how suffocating they can be with their questions and they have no idea what it's like to suffer from anxiety.  People think they are helping when in fact they are making things worse.

    Look after your  own business, don't feel obliged to help this company as they seem to not do you any favours and moving abroad might be a great idea smile

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    • Posted

      You're welcome to come with me smile I love Glasgow, have family up that way.  I understand what you're saying about ignoring calls etc. some people have the best intentions and just make things worse. My family went through a phase of making anti-suicide calls to me, being an obligation to them just made me feel worse! Now thankfully they think I'm fine, and I do like talking to them. Thankfully they like to talk about their problems... I'm a better listener than a talker. smile
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    • Posted

      I'd gladly move abroad if I could find work smile  Yeah I'm in my element listening to others' problems as I don't like being questioned about my own.  People don't realise that for something to be theraputic it can't be forced or rushed.  Like growing plants or baking a cake.  People saying 'just try not to get so stressed'...that one makes my blood boil.  
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