Be proud of your depression. Speak up.

Posted , 3 users are following.

Depression, the intrinsic feeling of sadness, often floats into our lives with the arrogance of not even having the reasons with it to vindicate such a feeling. Depression is the secret we all share, whether you’ve felt it yourself or know someone close to you who has experienced it, I’d be surprised if you weren’t aware of the perils that come with it. Braided in our genetics, most are predisposed to this mammoth melancholy and only need one trigger to set off a spiralling cycle of anxiousness, daunt and numbness. Depression doesn’t just eat away at your happiness, it slaughters your vitality and without vitality we are nothing. Society has made depression feel like an illness we should be embarrassed of, it is seen as a sign of weakness to the masses rather than a strength of admittance. It silences its catastrophic number of sufferers and represents the light at the end of the tunnel as a train. Even I am struggling right now giving my narrative on my experience but I know there are far worse feelings than being vulnerable. If, like myself, you were able to pull yourself out of the debris of depression, you might have a new found and profound ability to retrospect. Now I have came out the other side I am able to appreciate my depression in a way I could never fathom when the hell first came to visit. Due to being bed-ridden for a few weeks, I had a large amount of time to self-reflect. Most of my time was taken up analysing why I had depression and then welling up with shame as I always felt I was stronger than that. Anxiety made the simplest tasks unbearable, I cut myself off from friends and family and could only find solace in running and sleeping. All the things I once found great joy in diminished alongside my hope. The whole experience lasted just over half a year and whilst I still have the very rare spell, I am glad to say I’ve removed pretty much all of the depression and anxiety I had. Whilst I don’t doubt they will visit me one day again, I don’t fear their visit, I embrace it. Depression and anxiety made me an even stronger person than I was and gave me an abundance of empathy in the process. Having depression made me appreciate things that would have passed into my subconscious before the experience. I experience intense feelings of rapture and joy more than ever before and after you spend 6 months completely numb wondering if you’ll ever have feelings again, you’ll understand why. Depression made me fight. Depression made me realise my current state of living wasn’t alleviating my problems but inadvertently accelerating them in the process. It made me develop a creative outlet, I used the emotion this iconic state provoked as a platform to write. This writing would eventually be viewed hundreds of thousands of times. It made me create a business. A business that would 6 months later on touch and push thousands of people to invest in my idea and ultimately me. Depression made me understand myself better than ever before. Depression made me connect with people in a way I never have before. Depression opened my eyes to beauty in things I’d never seen before. Depression gave me empathy.

So whilst most would rather remain voiceless and solitude regarding their encounter or on-going experiences with depression, I am here shouting about it. I am not doing this for attention, I am doing it in the hope it will beckon people to find their voice. Let’s face it, life is tough and shit happens. We all go through stuff and it isn’t what we go through what it is important, it is how we react to it.

I hope you find happiness.

David

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4 Replies

  • Posted

    Hi David,

    I have read and truly enjoyed your post. It is real and it captures the darkness but also the light at the end of the tunnel of depression. Indeed many have tried to push depression into the shadows; and most have underestimated it. I can from a culture that openly define depression as a form of weakness of mind and heart and many men in this same tribe and culture have died from the refusal to face it or acknowlede it having chosen to embrace suicide as a bold escape.

    Please keep on written and sharing - you have a definite gift that many could benefit from.

    I agree with the fact that we all go through stuff and the truth is in life we shall always go through stuff - but that should never be what we focus on, but rather the reactions we have to life and stuff - this is what truly defines us.

    Depression is real and should be acknowledged but also the good news is that there is genuine reality of recovery from it.

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  • Posted

    Hi David ,

    Thank you for sharing your post , which I found very interesting . Depressing is a horrible illness . I am in the depths of it at the moment , and my world looks black and hopeless , with suicide looking very tempting .

    It gives me hope that you have come through yours , how did you do that ?

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  • Posted

    Evidence suggests there are five steps we can all take to improve our mental wellbeing.

    If you approach them with an open mind and try them, you can judge the results yourself.

    •Connect. Connect with the people around you: your family, friends, colleagues and neighbours. Spend time developing these relationships. Learn more in Connect for mental wellbeing.

    •Be active. You don't have to go to the gym. Take a walk, go cycling or play a game of football. Find the activity that you enjoy, and make it a part of your life. Learn more in Get active for mental wellbeing.

    •Keep learning. Learning new skills can give you a sense of achievement and a new confidence. So why not sign up for that cooking course, start learning to play a musical instrument, or figure out how to fix your bike? Find out more in Learn for mental wellbeing.

    •Give to others. Even the smallest act can count, whether it's a smile, a thank you or a kind word. Larger acts, such as volunteering at your local community centre, can improve your mental wellbeing and help you build new social networks. Learn more in Give for mental wellbeing.

    •Take notice. Be more aware of the present moment, including your feelings and thoughts, your body and the world around you. Some people call this awareness “mindfulness”, and it can positively change the way you feel about life and how you approach challenges. Learn more in Awareness for mental wellbeing.

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  • Posted

    Hi David (and anyone else reading this)

    I am pulling out of the Big D for what hope is the last time, after and almost 30 year circus of mis-diagnosis, sloppy treatment and an overwhelming sense of shame. And I now realize how stupid I've been - about the shame and sense of stigma, I mean.

    And I thinks it's time to end this.

    I propose that we (ex-?)depressives need to get out of the closet, to steer society towards realistic accpetance of our existence, our fortitude and our value as human beings.

    In short, that we learn from the experiences of the GLBT world; the activism on behalf of the mentally handicapped; the racial integrators, and all the others that have fought to engineer a more sensible society.

    I have no idea how to go about organizing such a thing so, as a first step, I reach out to you to see how symmpathetic you might be to such an initiative, who you might know who might be recruited with a knowledge of effective tactics and strategies. You get the idea.

    Any interest?

     

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