Been on anti depressants for years

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been on anti depressants on and off for years had loads of therapy and seen doctors but still feel like crap cant let the past go keep trying and trying so much in my head i could bore you all with my life.

if you look at my life from the out side its shinney and good but feel dead inside made so many mistakes with money property and friends jobs and the past had parents who thought they did a good job but where crap. 

even my last therpist thought my head was so messed up .now on venaflaxine 150mg 

sorry for going on again but really wish i was never born ....

 

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  • Posted

    hi im new to this page i have depresson and also are very anxious and i too wish i was not born as im just the same have a lot of problems its like you get  stuck in it and theres no way out that how i fell sometimes so i understand you im looking for so many ancers like how long will i fell like this and dose it get better im felling realy low and with me being very anxious i get sick when out and about as i get so nervis and worrerd that it makes me sick 
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  • Posted

    Hi,

    Sorry to hear you're feeling so low. You say your life looks shiny on the outside but you feel dead inside? Have you thought about what could make you feel more fulfilled? Material things, status etc don't make everyone content -sometimes doing things to help others can, or new hobbies and stuff like that. Just living for life itself and having an impact on other people rather than keeping up appearances. Everyone makes mistakes so if you have too it's okay. Mistakes = trying. Mistakes = guts to take a risk. Mistakes = going for it. Mistakes = lessons. It's how you look at it.

    Have you tried any counselling or therapy to work through the issues you mentioned with your parents? Childhood events can have a huge impact on us as adults, negative thinking and behaviour patterns form instinctively and it takes quite a lot of in depth analysis to work it out and change things.

    These are just some thoughts in response to what you've said. I could be barking up the complete wrong tree!

    Hope you can get through this though.

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    • Posted

      thanks for the advice in the past i have tried some volunteer work for help the age but the ladys i as sent to had help any ay and the family thought i was after money . which made me feel poorly,  

      im now strarting another round of therpy which starts next week on a open ending set. im so mixed up and one day i can ok then just go down its like what im writting its all over the place .i live in nottingham and feel sorry for my self everything thing i do say dont say dont do i regret if i had the guts and could just walk and walk .i really do need help sorry for going on but this is the only place i can speak what i feel 

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  • Posted

    Sorry to hear about your depression. I've been on anti-depressants for 17 years and my main problem is a lack of motivation. There is a sameness about life which is difficult to avoid, especially as one gets older and less able to change one's situation in life. It's difficult to find something new to take an interest in. I changed from paroxetine to fluoxetine 7 weeks ago, but have just gone back to paroxetine again on a higher dose than previously. I feel more relaxed on paroxetine but more sleepy. I did feel more motivated on fluoxetine but a little more uptight. Maybe I still need more time for the medication to have an optimum effect on me. But like yourself, I'm fed up with feeling this way and feel I'm at a dead end. I feel unable to take an interest in things generally. Is there anything at all that I can turn to for help?
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    • Posted

      like you i keep feeling when will this end .therapist and the doctors tried to help my wife does my dads a waste of time and my two brothers are useless i don't talk  to them my mum died a couple of years ago and we where close when she died for a few years .so now she has gone i have nobody but my wife and a friend in hull i live in Nottingham i wish i could just fall a sleep and never wake up.

      And the pain would go a way I hate it when my family used to say pull yourself what have you got to be depressed about .

      Look at all the famous that have committed suicide. All you hear is they took the easy way out.

      really to end you life is hard and takes planning and guts .…

      i havent.

      im on venflaxine and its supposed to help upstairs in brain department but other parts stop working and im a MAN !!!!!!! 

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    • Posted

      Well, I'm a woman and also married although our partnership isn't particularly exciting. I usually look forward to going to sleep at the end of the day. On the surface of things, there's nothing really to complain about, but life is quite frustrating. Unfortunately these tablets make me lethargic and i feel even less able to do something about my situation. I have learnt to live life one day at a time. No planning ahead. I walk a lot, which I find helpful and I also like driving. I like to be on the move as I find life rather static at home. Maybe going for walks might help you?
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    • Posted

      hi dopy just started another course of therpy may a 16 weeks if i can take it im married and my wife loves me but i cant say the words to be honest im fed up of it all i keep saying and i mean it i wish i was never born the tablets the doc wants me to 200mg soi have had blood test and urine test and waiting for the results in a few days even work are asking about the time i take of even when i work my diner do some 12 hour days its friving me insaine years ago they would have looked me away 
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