1. Community
  2. Infections
  3. Genital Herpes Simplex

Being told ypu have herpes simplex....

Posted , 6 users are following.

leslie9862
leslie9862

I've recently been diagnosed with genital herpes and i can't shake this feeling of disgust, anger and feeling dirty.

As a gay male ive always been one for being carefull and ive never once not used a condom for sex... im so clean and conscious of good oral hygiene its unreal, im not promiscuous in ANY way. My friends used to joke and say theres kinky way up high, middle is vanila and then you way down low!!!Im absolutely devastated, i cant even look myself in the mirror. I feel like ive been given a death sentence. It sounds dramatic i know, and im honestly not a dramatic person.. How do you even pop this into a conversation when meeting your potential next partner? I cant stop crying about it and i really cant tell anyone. As i honestly think they will just see a dirty promiscuous gay man...

Feeling so lost all of a sudden.

P.s sorry for the spelling mistakes, im dyslexic and typing through tears....

Help??? X

0 likes, 8 replies

8 Replies

  • ashlyn26137
    ashlyn26137 leslie9862

    Posted

    You’re not being dramatic at all I was the same way for a few months after I was diagnosed as well, I tell whoever I start talking to right away because I don’t want to gain feelings if he doesn’t want to be with me anymore once I tell him, that way I am free from a heartache so for me it’s better to tell the person right away. Some people don’t care though, I was focusing on myself before I started dating again I’m not with anyone but have been talking to someone and he doesn’t care. Someone will love you for you. I feel a little normal now tell I get symptoms and it’s ok to cry about it sometimes let it out.
  • FelizCastus
    FelizCastus leslie9862

    Posted

    Which HSV type do you have? Did you have an outbreak, or were you just diagnosed by blood test without any symptoms?
  • JustMe2017
    JustMe2017 leslie9862

    Posted

    Hi there, I’m also newly diagnosed with Genital Herpes and no symptoms that I can speak of. I am now just trying to learn my body and pay attention to it since it’s only been a month and I obviously may have been overlooked something. I don’t plan to date for awhile because I need to be better educated about the virus and how my body responds to it before I can calmly explain it to a potential mate. It’s only been a month now for me so I have good days and bad days but it’s emotional and  not physical. I’m trying to rely on my faith but even some days that doesn’t seem to help. I encourage you to try and not beat yourself up over this and that you’re not alone. So many others have this but no one is really talking about it. 
    • FelizCastus
      FelizCastus JustMe2017

      Posted

      If you have never had symptoms, then I would double check the type of blood test you had done and your test values. Not all herpes blood tests are created equal and false positives are not unheard of.
    • JustMe2017
      JustMe2017 FelizCastus

      Posted

      I had the IGG blood test during my annual exam and at my request. Came back positive for HSV2 with number 5.5 so from what I’ve been reading that’s not false . I was negative for HSV1. Doc said to come back if I got a sore for them to swab and sent me on my way. Of course ever since then the slightest thing that goes on down there leads to thoughts of “this must be the herpes “. If I get a slight itch on my leg or my face tingles for seconds I think it’s the virus messing with me. 😞😞 This has done a number on me more emotionally than anything else. 

    • FelizCastus
      FelizCastus JustMe2017

      Posted

      Sounds like that is a legit positive, and if so, you are lucky to have never experienced any symptoms! Itches on your leg and face can be disregarded. No need to fret that much. Not all genital issues are herpes either. I guess the only advantage to having had a confirmed outbreak is knowing what to be on the lookout for!
  • jessica79408
    jessica79408 leslie9862

    Posted

    You are not alone. Plenty of us with this unfortunate disease. Doesn’t make you nasty. As u see we can get it with condoms depending upon the location of the rash. It will get better and your life is not over. 
  • flowers_13749
    flowers_13749 leslie9862

    Posted

    I really wouldn't describe it as a disease, it is no harm to your health it is simply an inconvenience on the skin. 

    I think at first it is completely understandable to be really upset as it is something new you didn't have before but time heals and you get used to it and it doesn't upset you anymore, for some people it takes a while longer to get to that point than others. some people go years without symptoms, when you get used to the idea you will see it really isn't such a great deal I promise! 

Back to top

Report or request deletion

Thanks for your help!

We want the community to be a useful resource for our users but it is important to remember that the community are not moderated or reviewed by doctors and so you should not rely on opinions or advice given by other users in respect of any healthcare matters. Always speak to your doctor before acting and in cases of emergency seek appropriate medical assistance immediately. Use of the community is subject to our Terms of Use and Privacy Policy and steps will be taken to remove posts identified as being in breach of those terms.