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I've never been on a forum before and not even sure if it has anything to do with depression, but I could do with some advice. I was in a same sex relationship for close to 13 years. I'm American but moved to England to be with her. Everything was fine until my girlfriend's dad died 5 years ago. She quickly changed and treated me badly. I know it's understandable & I by no means blame her but it tore us apart. She became secretive, started lying, partying and treating me more like her maid than a lover. She now devotes every waking moment to social media even taking her phone to the bathroom with her and talking to everyone but me on these apps while we were on hol, at concerts etc. She says she does it because she's bored but how could she be bored on hol etc? She's obviously addicted and I honestly believe she uses social media as a way of coping to keep her occupied because she never mourned her dad. In fact, the only time she speaks of him is through social media. I've always had low self esteem and jealously issues. The situation made me worse and I became convinced she was cheating because in my mind why else would she spend so much time on these apps especially when she stopped showing me attention. She swears she never cheated but our love life became non existent and we both stopped trying. I started to feel down and not myself so she suggested I go home in US for a 'break' so she could see how much I mean to her but assured me I'd be back. After 1 day, she shocked me by ending it saying she no longer loves me and completely ignored me. I told her I'm in love with her and would do anything to get her back but she acts like she couldn't care less and even told me she no longer wants to speak to me. The person I fell for would've fought for us and never let me go. I can't believe that a person could change that drastically without something being seriously wrong with them so I'm positive she's suffering from depression. While looking up the symptoms, I'm now sure that I have it too. It's been 2 months and I'm getting worse rather than better. I no longer enjoy anything, can't sleep, don't eat much and have had serious thoughts of suicide. I really don't know what to do and appreciate any help given. Thanks so much for taking the time to read this.
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