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Hi Internet friends ,
I'm sorry i have been posting on here a lot lately. Hope I'm not annoying you, but I don't know who else to talk to this about. My therapist has been out for about a month. I see her in a few days but I haven't had anybody who gets what I'm going through to talk to. So here is my story, sorry it's kinda long
last night I had a few vodka drinks. My boyfriend quit texting me so my anxiety brain made the worst assumption ever, that he was with another girl. So I text him about it and also sent like 5 suuuuuuper embarrassing snapchat videos basically yelling at him and saying he was laying with another girl. Well anyways I finally fell asleep and I had a text that said"sorry I crashed and I'm not with anyone... I want you here if you'd wanna be, but after how sure you are that there's someone else I don't think you do... But I'd like to cuddle you, anyways good night sleep well n we will talk tomorrow" so I woke up and text "sorry I'm the biggest a**hole in the world" and he said that "he needed to time to think about last night after the texts and snapchats because he was overwhelmed"
And all day I've been crying and having bad anxiety waiting for him to reply and I'm afraid he'll never talk to me again because it's kind of a new relationship, so I feel like he won't be as forgiving as a man who's been with me for a long time. I looked like a jealous freak. And now I'm just so sad and scared!
I guess I don't know why I'm posting this. I guess I need advice, comfort, anything. I'm just so sad. How can i fix this? I like him a lot he has made my anxiety better and makes me want to change. But now we are fighting I don't know what to do
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