Can't sleep... shaking with fear!
Posted , 4 users are following.
I can't sleep... there's so much 'wrong' with me!! I'm driving myself demented.
Previously posted about right-side pain for last 10 days. Saw GP yesterday who poked and prodded and said all seemed ok. Well the pain moved upward slightly today so I figured it is gastro related and didn't worry as much.
Went on a long, cold walk today and ended up with chilblains and a big blood blister on top of my middle toe... now I notice I can feel my lymph node in my groun... could the chilblains etc be to blame for that?
God, I'm so scared of dying and leaving my beautiful children behind!!
I don't want any of this! Even if, god willing, I am ok, one day, i won't be... I feel like a ticking time bomb 😔
1 like, 5 replies
Needhelp_asap ScaredyCake
Posted
? can relate to this, only I wake up shaking. Also what you said about the ticking bomb! So me! Even if there's nothing wrong now there will be and I don't wanna think about it. However we can't live with that fear cause we miss out on many things. We have to try and do baby steps and get out of this vicious cycle! Yeah all those symptoms can be cold related. Cold affects the body! You're not dying anytime soon!
ScaredyCake Needhelp_asap
Posted
Thanks for replying. I feel so lonely with all this. Don't feel like I can talk to anyone about it. I haven't got out of bed yet and I do t wNt to either. But feel like I shouldnt be wasting time if there is something really wrong!
I'm exhausted from being scared of my own body!
God I sound utterly pathetic!
Needhelp_asap ScaredyCake
Posted
You shouldn't! There are a lot of people who feel the same! Including me and loads of others! What about your husband, can't you talk to him? If there was something wrong you'd have worse symptoms, you'd knew!
ScaredyCake Needhelp_asap
Posted
My dad didn't know... he died from kidney cancer almost 2 years ago and he didn't know. Neither did the GP and his tumour was the size of a football! Pretty sure this is where my health anx has stemmed from 😔
Needhelp_asap ScaredyCake
Posted
He didn't notice any symptoms? I think that's the other side of it. There are people who never go to the doctor (like my dad who died as well from a heart attack and my health anxiety is caused by that as well) so don't connect those things. How old was he?