1. Community
  2. Women's health
  3. Menopause

Cant take it anymore

Posted , 9 users are following.

lennie45832
lennie45832

The last four days have been total hell, I am going again to the dr. The joint pain, swelling, chills, chest tightness, and muscule aches is ridiculous, I went to our emergency clinic last week, no flu, no fever, the nurse said it sounds like you are just having a really bad peri with the joint stuff. None of the natural stuff is working, I feel like crying. I dont understand why this is happening and why I cant get any relief. I dontwant to do an HRT, but I cannot imagine going through this for years. So, making an appointment tomorrow.  Has anyone had this and what have you guys done with success. 

1 like, 42 replies

42 Replies

Prev Next
  • MrsMerm
    MrsMerm lennie45832

    Posted

    Yes the pains can be just awful, I experience them in my neck shoulders, arms and wrists, it's exhausting!!!

    I find if I am stressed that they become much worse.

    I FEEL ANGRY AND DISAPPOINTED WITH THE MEDICAL PROFESSIONALS AS THEY HAVE BEEN NO USE WHATSOEVER, THEY SEEM DETACHED AND UNAWARE OF THE MENOPAUSE/PERI-MENOPAUSE SYMPTOMS

    I now realise why a colleague of mine committed suicide 15 years ago. I was obviously much younger and did not know that what the menopause could be like. She went into clinical depression and must have been suffering so much. This person went from being a superb functioning accomplished individual to a mess.

    MORE SCIENTIFIC RESEARCH IS REQUIRED TO HELP US, SURELY.............

    I appologise for the vane of this email and wish you all a good day, hopefully free from the anx of Meno symtoms

                                                       wink   

    • metamorphed
      metamorphed MrsMerm

      Posted

      Hi

      You are so right.  I was shocked at the lack of information, care, etc., by both female and male doctors.  All of us on here, I am sure were hard working women, able to cope with everything in life, apart from any usual blips along the way, but this phase takes you unawares, turns your life upside down and makes you feel out of control, and completely out of the blue!  I had to convince doctors along the way that I was not overly anxious, had never suffered depression and had never had panic disorder before this hit me.

      I would of course had those small life anxieties like everyone for sure, but this phase took me down and I didn't recognise myself.

      Doctors need to recognise the start of this transition, and know how to save women from the trauma of test after test by referring them immediately to dedicated menopause specialists, who can reassure women from the start and avoid unnecessary further health anxieties.

      Women shouldn't be expected to go find information themselves, trying all sorts products and solutions and feeling alone during this vulnerable time.  It is 2016, the knowledge is there, but yet, not being shared with those who need it.

      thanks for your post on this.

       

    • lennie45832
      lennie45832 metamorphed

      Posted

      Absolutely, I am with you very much, as you said we go from test to test, worried about every thing, googling every symptom which I do NOT recommend.  There is a massive lack of information and as you said the medical professsion is ignorant, all they know is either HRTS or No HRTS, their solution seems to be shrugging.
    • jackie95472
      jackie95472 lennie45832

      Posted

      That is exactly how I feel.  Thank God I had a therapist to listen to my very dark dark days along with the other symptoms I had.  It was a living hell and yes my OBGYN looked baffled.  All she kept saying is it will get better.  Things will calm down.  I had to figure out what to do for myself and what options I had available.  Lots of reading, lots of talking to other women about their path.  My OBGYN said if their was a magic pill it would be worth BILLIONS.  Seems she knows there is no answer but to hold on tight.
    • sophie76397
      sophie76397 MrsMerm

      Posted

      Hi Mrs Merm

      I totally agree with you regarding our medical professionals out there - I have been to countless doctors who look at me as though I am ABSOLUTELY MAD and all I want to do is burst into tears.  In fact I deserve an oscar for the amount of crying I've done.  My poor husband has been amazing - I am currently suffering from aches and pains EVERYWHERE - arms, wrists and knees - my joints are killing me particularly when waking in the morning.  I get rid of one symptom for a while and then another 'old friend' pops up again - it's a vicious circle.  I'm hating this but thank god for discovering this site - I now don't feel so alone.  These doctors need to become more aware and empathise more.  I now don't go to the doctor as they are so unhelpful.  I've taken on board everyone's comments and advice.  Thank you to all of you.  

       

  • Zigangie
    Zigangie lennie45832

    Posted

    Hi Lennie.

    I have just started HRT for lack of libido more than anything else.

    It has got rid of some aches and pains but so far not all of them.

    I didn't want to do HRT either but I'm so glad I did. It was a joy the first week being able to sleep without putting the covers on and off all night. Although I Wasn't getting many hot flushes I was just so very hot all the time.

    I have had depression and anxiety for about 10 years and just had the best Christmas for so long I'd forgot what halfway normal feels like.

    Also I've had horrible painful feet for some time and they were better within the week.

    Sex life and confidence better dry eyes and sore jaw much better.

    I really wish I'd gone in for it sooner.

    I've only been on it about 8 weeks.

    Hope this helps.

  • Zigangie
    Zigangie lennie45832

    Posted

    Hi again,

    You ladies are so right. The medical establishment just goes about treating each "problem".

    No one ever said to me this could be perimenopause when I began suffering deep depression.

    I had been previously diagnosed with Bipolar disorder. So it was always this is the depression side of things. I told them it can't be that because I had just married the man of my dreams I had absolutely no reason to feel this way. I did try and take my life.

    I have been committed to the mental health unit with it about 8 times in the past 10 years. Put on various anti psychotics anti depressants been to Hell and back!

    Been there with hair thinning painful feet dry skin itchy all over. No one ever said it could be because of perimenopause!

    I went when my periods became erratic and was told it wasn't a problem I still had eggs just not enough estrogen to "push out the remainder"

    Meanwhile I'm busy googling Bipolar disorder!

    It didn't even cross my mind to look at anything menopause related until my periods had stopped for a year. Lack of libido was blamed on the medication I was having for Bipolar so I decided to stop taking it. Low energy was going to be sorted by b12 injections because I was deficient.

    B12 stopped my fingers tingling ( the first time i complained of that was 20 years previous to this and I was given B6 which did nothing so I just put up with it).

    When my libido didn't improve I went to my GP and asked for HRT.

    She prescribed premarin and I suddenly thought horse urine? I don't know where I knew that from but no way was I taking horse wee.

    It was after much study about alternatives that I read something about livial and decided to see if i could try that. I'm not sure if it was related but 3 weeks later I awoke one night unable to breathe. Stopped taking it took 4 months and much hospital tooing and froing before I was ok again. It put me off for a while.

    I then read about going private and asked my husband if I could see her. He said no way you've already spent so much money looking for a cure ( and believe me I had taken every wonder potion herb vitamin mineral homeopathy herabalist supplement going).

    I then read Some of Professor John Studd's papers. He recommends

    Oestrogel and Utrogestan along with testosterone.

    I knew the GP would not test for nor prescribe testosterone as it's unlicensed.

    Australia is the only country to have testosterone for women so I got some (it can't be as dangerous as some of the anti psychotics I've had to endure).

    Indeed I've read that some gynocologists don't even test for it.

    It's about are you getting acne a deeper voice or hairyness.

    Anyway way to go this stuff! Wanting sex again. My vagina came back to life just like an arm when the blood goes back after pins and needles for the first few days.

    I still felt sore and dry so went to the GP and asked to try Oestrogel and Utrogestan. Yes of course "they are much more natural". But you would rather i took the mares urine because it's cheaper!

    Anyway it took about a month after starting oestrogel to get vaginal comfort.

    But I've just had the best Christmas in 10 years I'm not on edge and anxious all the time sleep is better Some aches and pains are gone depression lifting and sex life as it was in my early 40s.

    That is why I will keep posting on this and other site's if I can save one person going through some of what i have then it has to be worth a few minutes of my time.

    I just cannot believe I've been sent to dermatologist, neurologist foot specialist had ecg's x rays haematologist psychiatrist, A And E when perimenopause is known to cause these problems and HRT is known to help

    • jackie95472
      jackie95472 Zigangie

      Posted

      Unbelievable you went through that and nobody said it was perimenopause!!!  Thank goodness for this blog, it's educational.  That is what happens when you don't get the right answers or help from doctors. You have to do your own research.  

       

    • Zigangie
      Zigangie jackie95472

      Posted

      Hoping that lots of girls are looking on these websites and finding out.

      Then being able to make an informed choice.

      At the moment just the anxiety on edge feeling that left me is enough for me to continue with the HRT I feel like a real piece of me has come back from a very dark place.

    • BugglyBot
      BugglyBot Zigangie

      Posted

      Good grief, thank goodness you came out of this as you have. That is shocking and again, just shows how the perimenopause is being ignored by many. I hope things keep getting better for you and thanks for sharing x.
    • Zigangie
      Zigangie BugglyBot

      Posted

      Thanks BugglyBot,

      As I said in my post it's because they treat each problem as it arises as if you were not a woman of the "right age"

      I seriously thought (as many women posting on here do) that there must be something really badly wrong with me that they were somehow missing because loads of different symptoms began, one after the other. My husband accused me of being a hypochondriac.

      Unfortunately we had only met and married a short time before all this started.

      If he had known me better (I always used to say I was disgustingly healthy up until then) he would probably have been seriously concerned as well and that in turn may have helped me get better care.

      Just hoping that us ladies posting our stories helps keep others out of that horrible dark place.

      Yes HRT has already helped so much and I have yet to pick up my third monthly prescription. I've been told it can take as long as 3 months to sort out most symptoms. Almost another 5 weeks to go!

      Feeling good.

    • jackie95472
      jackie95472 Zigangie

      Posted

      It takes 12 weeks for every HRT to come to it's full potential.  You must give it time.  When you change the dosage give it another 12 weeks for that dosage effect to take place.  A long process but yes I'm in a better place, much better.  I can now sleep again, I'm not a hot furnace, my mood is so much better (I'm taking prozac for that but hope to get off soon).  FDA does not approve of HRT for moods so be aware of that and consider anti-depressants.  Good luck to all, it was a very tough road for me as well.  Clean up your diet too.
    • Zigangie
      Zigangie jackie95472

      Posted

      I have a pretty good diet. The first week on the HRT I slept like a baby best non sleeping pill sleep I've had in 10 years. But only for one week. It then went back to normal. No sleep at all Sunday night and just 3 hours last night. But I feel much calmer so it's just tiredness.

      I'm going back to see my doctor at 3 months if sleep is still a problem I will see if i can go up to 4 pumps oestrogel instead of 2.

      Also very first progesterone pill "utrogestan" that I took made me feel sleepy but only really that first one. I know lots of women seem to dislike the progesterone but it doesn't seem to effect me.

      Well I went on it for lack of libido and yeah the furnace.

      I was permanently just so hot. I got a few hot flushes a day but I wasn't sweating just burning up inside. Cooking a meal near the oven was awful. Also in bed during the summer I just remained half in half out. But as soon as it cooled down a bit the covers were on and off every 5 to 10 minutes all night.

      I have cooled down a lot but still remain a lot warmer than I always was. I used to worry about being the "ice queen" that I had bad circulation or something but when you have lived most of your life that way you just get used to it.

      I have never liked feeling too hot as I never seemed to sweat and sweat cools you down.

      I have really not had sweating except for a few months just coming out of peri when I woke up with a little damp chest a few times.

      And ladies if you have a look at some of Professor John Studd's pages he will assure you that HRT is good for treating mood and also depression.

      Also just to say if you are having problems and you are able to take HRT. It won't harm to give it a go. I really wanted to do the whole thing without but boy am I so glad I'm on it.

      Yeah it's a bit scary but at the end of the day for me anyway it has to be about quality of life. I feel like I'm waking up from a 10 year nightmare.

      Hope this helps.

    • jackie95472
      jackie95472 Zigangie

      Posted

      I agree you would think that when your hormones go wacko that replacing them would be the answer to the depression.  Yea I don't get it why they don't approve hormones for depression during perimenopause.
Back to top
Prev Next

Report or request deletion

Thanks for your help!

We want the community to be a useful resource for our users but it is important to remember that the community are not moderated or reviewed by doctors and so you should not rely on opinions or advice given by other users in respect of any healthcare matters. Always speak to your doctor before acting and in cases of emergency seek appropriate medical assistance immediately. Use of the community is subject to our Terms of Use and Privacy Policy and steps will be taken to remove posts identified as being in breach of those terms.