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Dealing with other issues in life

Posted , 6 users are following.

arlette98229
arlette98229

Anyone finding it hard to deal with family and other issues on top of menopause. My mother passed away six yrs ago and my father has put a huge burden on us since about me and my sisters  not being in the same country as him and complaining about everything. He has rung and complained  several times a day each year for 6 yrs. In the first few years after it happened it was truly horrendous.  I have only been able to visit once a year cant bear it but feel v guilty. My best friend is seriously ill and its not looking good for her at all and my young sister needs constant support and rings incessantly. If Im not exposed to other peoples problems I can just about manage but being surrounded by negativity on an hourly basis is making me shrivel up and is killing all hope in me -  I cant seem to escape other peoples issues.  Every time I start to feel a bit positive I get another negative update or graphic detail about various problems. I feel like cutting all ties with everyone sometimes.  Its difficult when there are these life issues on top of menopause as friends and family dont see it as an issue.

Despite menopause symptoms  I still feel like I could build a new chapter in life but people around me just drag me back down and cutting ties will fill me with guilt... 

Anyone feel like packing a case and going to start something new?!

2 likes, 7 replies

7 Replies

  • karen66219
    karen66219 arlette98229

    Posted

    Oh heavens yes!  Not only do I feel exactly that way at times, but I also feel like my give a damn broke.  I have had stressors building up in my life and yesterday I just blew up.  This is so unlike me.  My mom was asking me if I would mind if my cousin stayed with me and my husband for a while, while she gets on her feet.  The woman can not hold a job, has anger management issues, and takes drugs.  I just lost it. 

    It probably does not help that in the past, I have not been the best person about setting boundaries.  It has been pretty easy to walk all over me.  Unfortunately, now when those same people come calling, I do not exactly handle it well.  There are times when I would like to run away, so I totally get it.

  • nancy0925
    nancy0925 arlette98229

    Posted

    Arlette,

    I totally understand how you feel.  Every day life is hard enough and throw peri into the mix and have health anxiety on top of it just makes it unbearable at times but what truly amazes me about us women? We do it anyway because we are fierce. We have that natural maternal instinct to take care of those around us. I feel like the worst of it is over for me or maybe it’s the lull before the storm lol but I survived some horrendous years of dealing with these hormone changes and I feel empowered. We won’t die from this, we will push on cause we are women ❤️❤️

    • arlette98229
      arlette98229 nancy0925

      Posted

      Thanks Nancy I too feel the physical symptoms have gone down a bit. Im 52 so not sure if its the calm before the storm!
  • karen96339
    karen96339 arlette98229

    Posted

    You get to a point in your life when you have to say, God gave me only I life . I cant live it for everyone else. I cant make everybody else happy or comfortable and have nothing left for me. Sometimes you have to walk away from the negative energy.
    • arlette98229
      arlette98229 karen96339

      Posted

      I agree as you ending up living through other peoples dramas. I hate the expectation that my phone should always be on and my sisters need daily phone calls and texts. I have to account for myself daily... There is no let up. I would like once a month contact....Anyway I guess people on here have worse issues than that. 
  • samantha46571
    samantha46571 arlette98229

    Posted

    I understand how you feel....i had to cut family members out of my life because of the dramas they were bringing and there was nothing positive they were bringing to me. I felt drained!

    ONE Life You have make the most of it. Put yourself first and everything else will fall into place. I wish you all the best :-) Be strong!

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