depressed and worried, not telling my family or friends!
Posted , 6 users are following.
Hi folks
I've been depressed before and on anti depressants. This episode started in February after trying to come off the ADs. The anxiety has calmed down mostly and friends and family have rallied round and helped.
I have had something to focus on though, my husband's 60th birthday and a visit from my daughter and her boyfriend.
It's all passed now and I feel so down. Nothing to focus on just going back to work Monday after being off for a month sick. I feel I have nothing in my life. Nothing to motivate me to do anything. My husband is happy at home pottering about and I have been in the past but not now.
I just need to tell someone and I feel on here everyone knows what it's like to feel alone and worried about upsetting friends and family by telling them you hate your life.
My kids are grown up so don't need me. I feel like a burden to everyone. The thought of going back to work is killing me, I know I can do my work deep down but I just want someone to come in, take my hand and say, let's go. They would look after me! Stupid eh!!
I'm going out with my friends today but I know I will say I'm fine,getting there, the usual crap!
Please tell me it will get better. Please say you understand. I'm so desperate to say all this but scared everyone will think I'm totally mad or being selfish as everyone has problems and difficult times, I know that but this turmoil in my head is destroying me.
It just all seems so empty and hopeless.
1 like, 16 replies
Justmemyself liz1234
Posted
Nothing you feel is in any way stupid. I can also speak as a mother and a daughter and say kids always need there mum.( I am 39 by the way) There is hope I promise, perhaps you just need a little more help from a neutral party. You are important and worth it.
liz1234 Justmemyself
Posted
I am staring counselling this week. I hope it will help. As you say some things you say could worry family.
That's why I love this gurus I know I can say anything and someone will give me help.
It us appreciated x
anne240 liz1234
Posted
I have, in the past, seen quite a few counsellors, but it did not personally help me. But I know a lot of people benefit from it. I do hope you feel it does help you.
archemedes liz1234
Posted
I am 71 years of age and have experienced many 'ups and downs' during my life to the point where I believe I am finally qualified to give you a precis of life as I see it.
My first observation concerns life itself, which is not the easiest of hurdles to overcome - it isn't and never will be easy.
I believe that our lives go very much in cycles, some uninvited thoroughly depressing and others having an upward and rewarding trend.
The secret to getting through it all in one piece is to recognise that this is how life really is, and if we are in the middle of a downward cycle to tell ourselves that all will be well in the end, which sounds rational and easy, but it isn't.
If I can assure you of anything at all it is that all will be well in the end. Yes, you might need medical help and the support of friends in the short-term, but after all this you will come out a much stronger person.
I would add that the sensible thing in the meanwhile would be to make those around you aware of how your life is at the moment, and in that way they will be able to offer you their support and added love which is something you desperately need right now.
My best wishes
anne240 archemedes
Posted
Wise words. Thank you.
bill32607 liz1234
Posted
craig2828 liz1234
Posted
anne240 liz1234
Posted
I need support, as we all do. We need our famikly and friends to understand as best they can. I too feel like you, a burden, but hey we brought our children up, surely they can give us some support as we get older. don't be afraid to ask for help and support. You deserve it.
Yes we do try to hid how we feel because we don't want to upset people. My friends know about my downs and are supportive. If I am quiet some days they know what is wrong. At least we have friends.
Yes I understand, of course I do. Will it get better you ask? Well it is up to us to live our life as best we can even if we do have depression. Not easy, but I have battled for 30 years, and I am certainly not letting depression destroy my life. I have learned to live with it, and deal with the downs as best I can. I know how you feel, we all do. We all feel like you do. You are not alone.
Take comfort in the fact that we all understand and support each other.
liz1234 anne240
Posted
Good luck to you too x
anne240 liz1234
Posted
I manage. Has been very hard at times. Lost a great deal, but hey I battle on.
Take care dear lady. We are all supportive of each other here, and that is very comforting.
katieo liz1234
Posted
I see you have many replies but I just wanted to say that I completely understand how you feel and expressing these feelings to people who haven't felt them before can make you feel stupid, selfish, crazy, unable to cope when others around you do. That's exactly how I felt.
If you have children as a 28 year old women who's married I will ALWAYS need my mum. She will always be the first person I want/need in times of crisis, emotional times and even the good times and things I now class as "little wins!"
You have to give yourself more credit - you deserve it.
On the work front I didn't realise just how needed/appriciated I was until I went off for 6 weeks. They were so glad to have me back and again gave me a boost I needed.
A very wise person once told me "Depression is not a sign of weakness, it is a sign that we have been too strong for too long"
Please don't think it's all dark, sometimes the smallest flicker can change into a beaming light.
Much Love to You xxx
liz1234 katieo
Posted
I made it back to work today, feel so proud of myself!! My work colleagues are all very understanding it's fab.
Just got to make sure I don't overdo things.
Thanks again. X
katieo liz1234
Posted
Make sure you celebrate your amazing accomplishment tonight - even if it is with an early night
It really helps when people are symathetic to your situation. It's a subject that's never really discussed but when I told my friends in work I was suprised at just how many people do suffer.
You're not alone. Massive Respect to you xxx
archemedes liz1234
Posted
Just please remember to take one step at a time, not to be frightened to express your feelings, and you will discover how strong you really are.
Well done.
R x
liz1234 katieo
Posted
😃
liz1234 archemedes
Posted
Thank you again for your support x