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I've been diagnosed with depression for over 10 year's but recently been getting worse , with thoughts of suicide, been referred to see a phycatrist and still waiting, the odd feeling is I'm happy at times and show no effects of feeling really low but then get the feeling of worthlessness and don't want to carry on anymore, like I'm only here for my 2 children who live with me full time and wouldn't want to leave on their own .
I know it's selfish and wouldn't do anything for that reason but if I didn't have any children I feel at times there would be nothing to live for , people don't understand how living with depression is very hard and get to old to ' get on with life ' which in their minds is ok but wish they could have a mind of a person suffering with this horrible illness , I'm not sure if I have clinical depression? Is there any difference between this and just normal depression.? I feel good one day then the next feel like ending it !!
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