Depression affecting my love life
Posted , 4 users are following.
Hi everyone...i wanted to post my difficult time....see...i love my wife to death...shes the world to me to be honest...i know she is.. me and her basically were together for 3 years now, like all day basically almost all day, everyday, never really drove each other crazy, tiny squabbles here and there but nothing too major, so we did like everything with each other...and recently alittle over a month ago she got a full time job so...shes gone a good chunk of the day, 5 days a week...and i have a hard time being on my own in general..but over the course of the month my mood started to dwindle, (i have a small part time job) and bam suddenly i got the thought of "what if you dont love her anymore?" and ever since then ive been having nothing but panic attacks...anxiety, cant eat, can barely sleep...and my brain keeps racing looking for any personality flaw and i just want this to stop! I suddenly feel like my feelings are locked away and cant feel them....all i can do is cry, and panic, and i feel tense sometimes looking at her because i guess i feel guilty? but i know i love her...i have told her whats going on and though shes alittle upset, shes more worried then anything...and wants to help but doesnt know how...ill have night terrors and ill immediately want to cuddle up to her and it starts to feel better when i do...but i hate this....its been so bad the past 3 weeks...i am seeing a therapist too btw only twice now but i wanted to get help asap..but im hurting...i used to be so carefree and bubbly...now im a hot mess (side note: before my wife now, i was in a mentally and emotionally abusive relationship for 5 yrs). but im trying hard...i dont wanna give up, i love her...but its so overwhelming...when will this pain stop...
1 like, 7 replies
sam18386 Angelnikolas
Posted
hi angel, it sounds like you need your own get out clause when you're not at work. be happy your wife is at work, be glad you are working part-time and appreciate what you both working will do. my husband works all the time, i worked part-time too but it was horrible we are going to have a huge drop of income soon and this is more scary. reinvent your life, have evenings with your wife, go to the cinema, the pub whatever you want to do. you clearly adore her. good luck!
Angelnikolas sam18386
Posted
its difficult because shes gone 9 hrs a day so..she doesn't get back till 10... and i know i love her but this....anxiety...and depression is kicking my ass. i was also diagnosed with Adjustment disorder
sam18386 Angelnikolas
Posted
hang on in there, at least she's able to work!
Angelnikolas sam18386
Posted
im doing my very best....i just get so scared sometimes...i know my anxiety is playing tricks on me...but its made me so depressed...i dont wanna be like this anymore...i love her so much...i hate that this thing is just a thing attached to me. i want to get better and will, just...its overwhelming how long it might be
diane98246 Angelnikolas
Posted
Wow sounds like you have your hands full emotionally and it's a good thing you're seeing a therapist. It also sounds like you are a definite candidate for antidepressant and anxiety medications.
These issues you have about being separated from your wife during the day and whether or not you love her are legitimate emotional issues that can be dealt with in therapy but meanwhile the medication can help you curb some of the intensity of the crying, panic attacks and other over the top feelings.
Good luck to you and please know that you are on the path to recovery - it just takes a while.
Angelnikolas diane98246
Posted
it happens when shes home too though...its driving me insane...i love her so much....but i feel like i cant feel anything ..or im tense...then constant anxiety attacks all day and night about it....i want to stay with her. i wish things were back to normal....i was diagnosed with an adjustment disorder from my therapist...and i wish he gave me anti depression meds but hes trying to heal me naturally i guess? but idk if its working....and i dont get to see him till 2 weeks from now....im constantly needing company cause im scared to be alone
sheaton50 Angelnikolas
Posted
https://www.theguardian.com/lifeandstyle/2019/apr/26/depression-dying-comas-treatment-heather-b-armstrong-book
Dying to beat depression: how 10 induced comas saved a blogger's life
Has anyone seen this new depression treatment that is still in the testing phase. I know my son is struggling so much that this treatment option does not seem drastic. I feel so bad for all of you.