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I was on Venlafaxine for around 2/3 years, i'm not sure how long, i lost track. The past few years seem like a blur, my memory isn't so good recently. I find it hard to remember yesterday.
I stopped taking venlafaxine on my own, cold turkey. Since my doctor was unwilling to taper me down - but it seems from reading other peoples experiences, you get the same withdrawl symptoms anyway.
I wanted to come off them because I felt like a zombie, I didnt care about anything.
It took around 11/12 days to get rid of the brain zaps, sweats, night terrors, shaking etc. all the bad symptoms. Its been a few weeks now and my depression has been getting worse again, every day feels like a struggle. I physically feel exhausted doing any task, I force myself to go to work, every day I am in work I hide in the toilet and cry. I walk home from work and cry, I feel pain in my chest because I am so sick of crying and feeling so lost all the time. I am now taking diazepam that my mum has given me to try and subdue the emotions, but now i feel floppy and depressed. I can't sleep at night and when I do I have horrible nightmares about my partner killing me etc.
I don't know what to do anymore, i get angry at everything and everyone, i can't stand the world i am in, it's a horrible place. I am losing all hope to keep going, I don't want to go to the doctor, i will only be prescribed more anti depressants; i just can't take anymore. I have been suffering from depression since my teenage years ( maybe 14/15) I have seen psychatrists and councelors but nothing helps. the last psychatrist i seen diagnosed me with emotionally unstable personality disorder and let me go, i was left with that and don't know what to make of it. she said i was too unwell to go with further appointments as it would be too much for me to deal with. i feel like every day is too much for me, i feel full of emotion and its so strong i just don't know how to deal with all these negative feelings. i just don't know what to do anymore, i feel like taking all the diazepam i have and going to sleep and never waking up. i could go on and on and on about how i feel, even as i write this i am crying. i just want everything to be ok, but it's never been ok. i'm sorry if this is all over the place, i'm just not sure what i'm doing anymore
3 likes, 9 replies
kristina16197 dinkydoo
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melissa230000 dinkydoo
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michael_37726 dinkydoo
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melissa230000 michael_37726
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cordelia18473 dinkydoo
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dinkydoo
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i have been on countless anti depressants, citalopram, sertraline and prozac (can't remember the generic name)
i found that prozac was the worst, i was on them for around a month and felt extremely suicidal it was after sertraline i was then put on venlafaxine. There was a gap between Sertraline and going on venlafaxine as i felt better, but then things got worse; i was in a motorcycle crash, then my gran died and i lost my buisness, so I went to my gp and they prescribed venlafaxine, it worked probably for around the first year but i started to realise i no longer enjoyed things i had in the past; my job requires me to be creative and i was really struggling to be creative. my mind drew blanks.
Now even after coming off them i still feel the same, every day i think to myself "is this ever going to end?"
last year i was assaulted and my jaw was broken and it felt like a final straw for me and felt i had no hope left, i feel anytime i leave the house i just can't wait to get back home, being around other people make me feel anxious and angry, even something as simple as someone sitting behind me on the bus, i just want to be invisible and dissapear in to nothing.
i'm worried if i get reffered to another psychatrist that i may be admitted in to hospital as it has been mentioned once before, but i always play down my emotions to doctors for fear of being sectioned. If I get sectioned I won't get sick pay since I am self employed, i feel so stuck.
i would like to go to classes but the though of leaving the house other than for work just makes me feel exhausted and anxious. i can't ever remember a time that i felt "normal" and happy.
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as a side note to others coming off venlafaxine, it helped me majorly by taking fish oil and take 2 paracetamol 4 times a day to help with the brain zaps.
every day felt like a hangover, it does get better around the 8/9 day mark. I did feel like giving in and taking my tablets again but i felt like i didn't want to go through all that pain for nothing. I did have to go to the hospital about 5 days in because i wasn't eating and the brain zaps were getting worse, the doctor at the hospital was no help at all, i felt like i was wasting their time as if i was making it all up, but i can't stress enough how bad the withdrawls are.
dinkydoo
Posted
I don't have panic attacks as often, i do feel them coming on but the vomiting has stopped now
anne240 dinkydoo
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Venlafaxine seems to be good for some people and not for others. For instance Prozac was the worse anti depressant I ever took, and the side effects were appaling, wheras Venlafaxine was the best I ever took and helped me a lot. Shows we are all different, and what suits one person, does not suit another. When I stopped cold turkey the depression returned, whereas this time, when I tapered slowly, it is 17 months since I stopped and depression has not returned.
I take lots of supplements, and am determined not to go back on anti depressants, which I was on for over 20 years.
I have seen numerous counsellors and psychiatrists, but in the end we have to struggle on.
Take care, and keep in touch. I really want to support you, but don't know how to help. I am here if you want to talk.
I have been low like you, and in despair and not wanting to go on. Many people here feel the same. I am doing OK, but there were times I thought I could never go on as life too difficult. I am still here 20 years later.
Keep battling.
Moni110 dinkydoo
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