Posted , 9 users are following.
I'm 48 and I can't remember the last time I woke up an said" it's good to be alive" When I look in the mirror I tell myself how much I fn hate you. I get these anxiety attacks that find myself pacing back in forth for a cpl hours in the middle of the night. I been telling cpl friends how I understand why people end their lives. I tell them "I get it". I know I need help but I don't think a drug can help me. I just want to try to talk about it. I don't want to hurt myself but it's getting harder everyday. Suicide is the most selfish thing that anybody could do. I don't want to hurt others by doing this. None of my friends are gay but I think I am and that bothers the s**t out of me..I FN HATE IT..I never been intimate with anybody. It's sad but it's true. Can't come out with it because I think it would make it worse with friends and family. Even though I think they know. I just hate my life.
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