Do i have social Anxiety?

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I am a very shy person, i hate being the center of attention and the thought that everyone is looking at me and i always feel that as if they are talking about me good or bad or judging me, i hate the feeling. when a teacher calls me out to say something or answer a question, my voice trembles, i get sweaty and i blush red in the face. i try to avoid social events as often as i can and the thought of going something or meeting with a person i have never met make me quite anxious. I don't like to say anything to anyone about it because i feel as that i might just a shy person and they'll think i'm being stupid or i want attention.

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5 Replies

  • Posted

    Hi AdoreNoir, firstly let me say that what you are experiencing is not stupid, and I do not think for one second people think that you are trying to focus attention on yourself.

    It is quite normal for people to be shy and uncertain of themselves when they are young, and there is nothing wrong with feeling that way.

    As you get older and gain more experience in life you will start to feel a little more relaxed in the company of others, but in the meanwhile you should not let it get you down.

    It is just one of those phases that we all go through in life. 

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  • Posted

    I'm sorry you feel that way, there's nothing worse than feeling like everyone is judging you but I don't know whether it's social anxiety or not.

    I tend to feel that way too but maybe not as bad as you because I can kind of say to myself "do you really care what others think" or "you're imagining it", and I just act like I have a little more confidence than I actually have and then I feel more confident if that makes sense? cheesygrin

    When answering a question in class, I answer loud and clear and if I don't know, I admit it and do my best not to seem ashamed.

    I learned the older I got that when you let go and believe in yourself other people react to that and when you smile they smile too and it makes you more approachable.

    I also do my best to talk to people as if they're my sister (who is like my best friend) or my brother (who I can say anything to and I won't ever feel embarrassed around him no matter how wrong I am smile )

    I hope that is some help to you...for me I just had to put myself in uncomfortable situations more often until I got used to it. and it doesn't have to be anything big, it could be a smile and a thank-you at the shopping till or a hello or wave/smile to the very next person who walks past you. Or go into a book shop and order a book that's not on the shelf (I used to always find this particular one nerve-racking)

    Good Luck! x

     

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    • Posted

      Maybe they will say you're overreacting or there's nothing to worry about, but they'd mean it in the best way possible way, and it's better to share your problems anyway because then they know what's going on in your life, and a problem shared really feels like a problem halved!

      Do you have siblings or cousins you trust? You might feel more comfortable talking to them. I know I could talk to my mum, my sister or my twin brother but my dad just doesn't "get" things so I prefer not to tell him anything :D but everyone is different.

      I doubt they will think you're being ridiculous though.

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  • Posted

    You really should not be afraid to speak to your parents about your problems.

    To become parents we all have to do a lot of growing-up, and it is quite probable that at least one of your parents might have experienced your problems at some stage in their own lives, or have known a close friend who suffered in the same way.

    I feel confident that your parents will not think you are being rediculous,

    Speaking as a grandparent I know for sure that parents only want the best for their kids and only want the opportunity to help them, so at least why don't you give them the chance to do just that?

    Best wishes

    Rod

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