Extreme insecurity caused by damage from Bruxism.

Posted , 6 users are following.

I'm 24 years old and my teeth and quite badly grinded down, my whole life I have been grinding my teeth have just never been able to stop, it was much worse when I was younger and in my teenage years but I still can't help but do it. To make things worse I have been looking for a partner recenbtly due to being alone pretty much my whole life and I feel like I will never find somebody having teeth like this, they are straight and don't have big gaps or anything but a fair bit is missing. I did all this damage to my self as a kid when I was too stupid to know better and try harder and now I may be alone forever I feel so ugly, I'm not exactly attractive anyway. The insecurity and worrying about my future is getting too much.

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8 Replies

  • Posted

    hi aaron have you been to see a dentist if not the sooner you get your teeth looked at the better the grinding problem can be helped with many be a shield to stop you grinding your teeth anymore! please go and get your teeth checked and take care david !
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  • Posted

    Hi Aaron;

    Welcome to the Anxiety Forum mate.

    You have come to the right place where we all have a good understanding of what you are describing so openly to us all.

    Since I have been living with anxiety for the past 4 years really, it is also not uncommon for me to be found grinding my teeth together until my mouth aches.

    It is sad to hear that you have been doing this all through your childhood and still up to now.

    And even worse it has infected your thought pattern and reduced you to feeling what you describe about yourself and truly affecting your self worth.

    This forum is here 24/7 and we are all here to build each other up at all levels.

    I can assure you we understand what you are saying ,some in here will relate very much of how you describe the physical reaction your body takes while challenged with anxiety.

    Anxiety and depression are lonley places to find ourselves.

    It often means we spend a lot of time alone without social contact of other human beings.

    We can often lack confidence to believe we are someone worthwhile to know and to be loved by others.

    Anxiety leads us to believe we are pretty much worthless and those thoughts that tell us we are ugly or unatractive can overwhelm us into actually believing these thoughts of a life time are true.

    Let me tell you a secret mate, these are mere thoughts , they are based on lies that want you to feel worthless , ugly and not orth knowing.

    These same thoughts want to rob you of any joy, peace and to experience what true love is.

    But as you begin to work with all these destructive and soul destroying patterns of thoughts , one at a time you will be opening up yourself to a whole new you , slowly step by step , inch by inch you will be empowered with the know how of how to say to those lying thoughts be gone and not only this you will have the tools to open yourself up to new and more constructibve thoughts that will begin to replace all those negative self image lies and begin to allow much more powerful and truthful thoughts that are set on solid foundation and not the ahy and sand that these thoughts are built on today.

    I encourage you to start with little things like saying to yourself "hey there best freind you are ok , your a good guy " then get yourself to the point of saying to yourself in a mirror alone by saying directly into the mirrot " I like what I am seeing - you that man in the mirror have so much hidden potential  " until you can then get to the major step of actually waking up each morning , sitting on the edge of your bed before standing and saying to yourself, "good morning me- its going to be another great and amazing day".

    The go to the bathroom and say to yourself "hey there Mr - your amazing and awesome and wirth so much, you that man I am looking at has so much potential to give and to love and be loved" dont turn yourself inwards and start looking at your teeth mate , look over and byond your teeth, that is something that can be fixed in time, it what is inside the man you are that has the answers to all those things you want out of your one life.

    And trust me you will be on a journey you never imagined possible.

    I feel already encourage that you chose to find the Forum here and to open up to a load of strangers , who wont be strangers for to much longer

    We soon hopefully will become faithful and reliant freinds who are here to give you all the support that your willing to accept and trust me we are all on a journey of learning about ourselves and there is power and strength in numbers

    Stick with the forum Aaron and you too can begin to start to find the freedom and real joy that you deserve for a lifetime.

    Things like partners , they are not a priority right now.

    What is the real priority is the journey you are about to start from this time.

    best Wishes mate

    PJ

     

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  • Posted

    Hello Aaron,  I am sorry that you feel unattractive and insecure because of your teeth.  Attractiveness is not just what people see on the outside.  Personality and what is in the heart are what true love will see.  Thou i understand that your confidence is badly affected by your teeth.  Please see a dentist soon as there is so much that can be done to improve the apperance of your teeth.  Fiancially this maybe expensive but go anyway to see what options are available and explain how you feel.  I can tell you that i was never able to wear a skirt above my mid calfs because i have had a deformed knee from the age of 11 due to septic arthritis.  My leg became bent and all my life i was concious of this.  I learnt to live with this and now i am able to accept this.  I have not got a bent leg anymore, i had 2 knee replacements and my leg straightened. I am older now and certainly wouldn't wear shorter skirts. Believe me there is a way around your problem and i understand that you feel self concious especially as people see our faces all the time.  You are young and love will come along when you feel confidence in yourself.  You have plenty of time yet so work on yourself first and the rest will follow. Hope this helps.

    Best wishes.

    Elizabeth.

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  • Posted

    I'm just not sure I will ever be able to afford to fix them sad
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    • Posted

      dear Aaron,

      I am sorry you cant see past this one problem regarding fixing your teeth.

      trust me its not your teeth that need to be fixed its whats goinh on in your head.

      I hope you can read so much of the advice and try to work with that .

      If I need to tell you my teeth are rotten too and I would love to have them all pulled out and replaced.

      But sadly it wont take my anxiety or depression away.

      Its up to me to have a real desire to understand myself and whats been happening indside my head.

      I wish you well mate

      PJ

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  • Posted

    But I'm only 24 and my teeth are really bad for my age its going to be a huge problem in itself. I have so many problems and they are real sad That's the worst part.
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    • Posted

      HI Aaron,

      Having read all the wonderful replies I think there's not much more I can add. You haven't said if you are a member of the fairer sex. I'm sort of assuming you are. Mother nature has heaped great instinctive responsibilities on bothe sexes.

      Us men can't really cry or be ill. And the ladies always want to look their best.

      My teeth are far from my best asset. I have had to cope with bruxism before we successfully diagnosed a sleep disorder. I'd go so fas as to say I have become a little nervous about my teeth as I sort of feel they are past their best.

      I think what's lacking in your current position is a plan. And I have to say any plan is going to be better than where you are now.

      What options do you have? I would imagine your dream ticket is to win the lottery and like Simon Cowell get your teeth done. Must admit I'd be more than tempted if I won.

      I'd like to pick up on somehting PJ has talked about. Much of what you are feeling is caused by your own internalising of this subject. You believe you are "ugly", therefore, you must be ugly. I have met some very physically attractive people in my time. But their personalities have been much less attractive.

      We're all two people. We are the outward appearing person and we are also the person within. Perhaps you have forgotten how attractive your inner self is.

      I'd suggest with the greatest humility that you try and put a positive spin on this subject. Pop and see you dentist and talk to them. And perhaps offer yourself a little bit of a break. None of us are perfect.

      Nuttymut :-)

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  • Posted

    I'm in the exact same position as you, all a result of night grinding due to university application stress. It baffles me how I have inadvertently destroyed my future, and what I'm supposed to make of it. I've never really been outgoing but this insecurity has put in an endless cycle of self hatred.

    Anyway I took it upon myself to see my GP about a month ago, he immediately put me on antidepressants and recommended counselling to ease my troubles and help me accept myself for what I am. I can't leave my room and sit at the computer or playstation for all hours of the day because if I choose to leave this safe place I'm just at the verge of tears all the time, even in school. The highlight of my everyday is falling asleep and escsping to a place whereby there's no way for anyone to judge me because I become the exact version of myself that I hope for every singke f****** day, scratch that every second of every day. If I hear someone laughing in my presence or even take the slightest glimpse at me the millions of thoughts that race through my head always seem to link back to my damn teeth.

    I carry a mirror around with me all the time and always need my surrounding lights to be on fully, wishing fir the idd chance that something would've changed. I never get involved in conversations to avoid exposing my teeth or generally haven't a means to laugh anymore. What does this make me? A moody, attention seeking idiot that doesn't the bigger picture of what's actually wrong with the workd we live in. Which doesn't make me feel any better.

    I've akso recently gotten braces, that draw more and more attention to my face, so I'm forced to wear my jacket hood at all times as sort of a defebce mechanism, I'm mocked for this aswell. Nobody understands the pain I have to go through every day, that drags more so than I want it too. It seems that I'm completely alone in what I'm facing, if at the age of 18 years I have to wake up to an anxiety attack and forced to brace what the day has coming, I just can't ge bothered.

    The only thing is when I do try to change my thought processes I feel I'm just kidding myself. I guess the ultimate cure for any wrong in life is death itself.

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