feeling scared and desperate
Posted , 7 users are following.
been on the peri rollercoaster for 4 yrs now, and just as i think i have learned to muggle through the barrage of symptoms a new and even scarier one seems to raise its ugly head. Im new to this site, but boy has it helped reading these stories. Id love to print these off and show them every doc ive ever seen, i can finally see that i am not a mystery, i am not a hysterical woman, all things ive been called in past. what id really like to know is do any of you ladies ever feel well? if its not my stomach its my joints, or my chest pain, migraines or flu like symptoms, or theres always the dreaded palps and anxiety. i feel like one just seems to be vanishing as another gets bad. i have had 6 periods in this time each between 6 to 8 mnths apart. sorry this post is long and rambling 2 nights with next to no sleep makes me waffle on hehe. hope today finds you all well and symptom free
0 likes, 22 replies
Snatchpiece sharon11608
Posted
I agree with you about it being a rollercoaster journey. I could have going through this peri for quite sometime but perhaps without really knowing. For me something felt so different inside from Nov 2012 and since then I am more aware of different things and have gone through the journey (and still do from time to time)
Snatchpiece
Posted
still experience the doom and gloom and the fear that something horrible is wrong when I know I have had complete health checks so should be happier and more at peace. There are times though that I actually feel like my old self and to be fair that during the last year since I have come on this forum I have learnt so much which helps put things into perspective and helps me shift these thoughts!
I am on low dose of HRT patches and believe these have helped a great deal as my blips only seemed to come when I was brewing up for a period after having missed one previously.
I guess we don't know how long our journey is with these symptoms and it can get so frustrating when you are back in a good place to then go have another blip.
I know for me that stress and being around high maintenance people sets me back so I do try and keep my distance from them.
If I had one wish is to get my old self back as before 2012 I was never at the doctors unless the usual girlie check ups but I guess before too long I will have a sat named after me the amount of times I have visited the doctors in the two years!!
I have found two lovely female GP's who have been really patient with me and I seem to mock me in making me feel that I need to be put on antidepressants.
It does get easier the bad times are becoming fewer and far between and I am understanding a lot more that these feelings I do get are quite normal.
massive hugs to you and hope you have a great weekend.
Joy🌹🌞
sharon11608 Snatchpiece
Posted
Snatchpiece sharon11608
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This forum has been a godsend as we are able to share our experiences with ladies who are feeling the same as we do and no one laughs at you or makes you feel a fraud or that you are going loopy loo like my own Mother has done to me, going round telling others that I have got medical issues! Not the thing I wanted to hear from my own cousin!
We all need support and understanding from people that can empathize with what we are going through.
I really wish I could have been more prepared to what I have experienced so far and perhaps could have got myself more clued up so I didn't go through these doom and gloom thoughts!
At least we all have each other's support on here to help calm each other down. Take care. X
Tracky Snatchpiece
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sharon11608 Snatchpiece
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i do think we are not prepared at all for this stage, periods our mums talked to us about them, pregnancies we had midwives, but i cannot rem anyone ever telling me that 1 day when i hit my mid 40's id become a rambling mess hehe.
glad that the hrt helps you a little, ive been told thats a no no for me because of blood pressure.
all we can do is as ive read on here before keep telling ourselves this to shall pass, and share our moans and groans with these lovely ladies on here. take care xx
Snatchpiece Tracky
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Sandy07 Tracky
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sharon11608 Snatchpiece
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nancy0925 sharon11608
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sharon11608 nancy0925
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debwestmids sharon11608
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Anyway,my husband turned round to me one day and said he had been listening to a gaenocologist on the local radio and he had been on about hormone imbalance,my hubby said it sounded like my symptoms and suggested i ask the dr for a hormone imbalance test,so i booked the appointment.
In the meantime,thats when i starte my research,but all my symptoms could have been due to a number of conditions.
It could have been:
Hormone imbalance
Adrenal fatigue
Fybromyalgia
hyperthyroidism.
I had the test done,rang up got the results and i was told"Menopausal changes"
Hurrah,a result!
The normal range is 1-15 and mine was 29,i was then told HRT or herbal its up to you and that was the support i received!
I had always been very wary of HRT so i tried the herbal route.
I was taking:
Macaroot
starflower oil capsules
Wellwoman vitabiotics 50+
osteocare vitabiotics
and multi vitamins.
After months and months of taking these,they had no effect what soever,so i stopped the macaroot,starflower and wellwoman and just carried on taking osteocare and vitamins.I certainly didn't feel anyw worse .
I felt really ill for about 4 months and then,the symptoms came and went but not so bad,but not alltogether,they were all there but split,but there was always one or two present.
Anyway,christmas of this year,i felt really ill again its like a severe case of flu where all your body parts ache and you feel about 90 years old.
I went to see a female dr this time because i thought she could identify with these things and would have a better understanding.I was prepared to give HRT a go because of how i felt.It turned out she was obviously anti hrt and said they wouldn't help me because i wasn't in the menopause.She didn't even read my notes about my hormone blood test,she said my aches and pains were osteoperosis and i couldn't sleep because i had insomnia so i came out feeling defeated.
I then decided to see another dr because i was still feeling ill.He agreed that hrt wouldnt help me but he said because i didn't suffer from hot flushes,it wouldn't really help me and that the side effects could possibly make me feel worse.At least this made sense to me.He then said that i was in perimenopause and that fluoxetine had helped people with this.
so i decided to give them another try because maybe it was not the tablets that made me ill last time,maybe it would have happened anyway?
So i tried them again.Noooooooooo!They effected really bad but not making me sleepy again,but my aches and pains,neck ache,stomach noise came back altogether with a vengeance,i didn't think i could feel any worse.
So once again,i stopped the tablets,i had only been taking them for 5 days.So this is where i am at now,still feeling utter shyte.It feels like i have an elastic band around me just under my bust and someone is sitting on me.
I had never heard of perimenopause before.i thought oh my periods are less frequent,its my age and i thought the menopause was hot flushes and thats it.We aren't educated to prepare ourselves for this stage in our lives and there is absolutely no support whatsoever.
When i found this forum,it was reassuring to me that i wasn't abnormal and so amny of us are all experiencing some of these symptoms and no one can appreciate what we have to go go through,but we are here to reassure each other.I felt a lot more positive after reading posts on here,especially about the brain fog,because thats another problem.I thougt i was losing my mind because i kept forgetting things and forgetting what i was talking about half way through a sentence,but i felt reassured because its part of the course.
I recently asked an online menopause expert about my situation and she said that during peri/menopause our body is put under more stress and if we take any drugs of any description,they can react differently and cause different symptoms that you wouldn't previously have had.
Sorry for going on,i just had to reply to you to let you know unfortunately its normal.
Hope you feel better soon hun x
sharon11608 debwestmids
Posted
i have just been looking into specialist menopause help and have found a menopause clinic in my town, rang and altho its 6-8 wks for a first appoitment i dont mind waiting, have you got nothing like this near where you live? this is apparently a new service run by the local council, might be worth looking into?
btw i cannot wear a bra due to the pressure under my ribs, so your not alone with that. was tested for RA cos ive also grown bumps on my elbows, another test that came back negative.
please dont worry about going on as you put it, i hung onto every word, i am going to show my hubby this as it will help him also to see that im not just lazy, i do feel generally unwell. atleast its a path we are all walking along together eh? take care for now, thankyou for the insightful words x
debwestmids sharon11608
Posted
I've read on here somewhere hun,that you can get the magnesium spray for the aches and pains fom Holland and Barratt.It is supposed to be very effective,but then i've been unsuccessful in everything i've tried from H&B,i've spent a fortune,but hey what the heck,i'll give that a go!I've just looked and its called magnesium oil spray and its £12.65 for 100ml.
I haven't been able to wear a proper bra either for at least 18 months,i have had to wear those crop type ones from Peacocks and i have to wear them in bed at night.Even these feel tight on me,no matter what size i wear.I do feel better for a while if i dont wear one,but then after a while it makes me feel uncomfortable again because of the weight of my breasts with no support .Does that make sense?
Please keep in touch hun,i would love to hear how you are getting on xx
sharon11608 debwestmids
Posted
i use holland and barrett too the one i travel to has a very knowledgable woman there, shes managed to get me liquids in most things i need, i did see the spray but if im honest the magnesium for the bath is dual purpose, when i feel really on edge i go run a lovely hot magnesium bath n soak till i feel myself coming down a little, its also good for the skin, being as i itch myself stupid most days. ive been trying the b6 and b 12 got both in liquid form, only been on them a week, but ive had a iffy stomach, been running loo lots so not sure if they are suiting my messed up digestive system.
oh the bra thing i could go on about for hrs hehe. i have bought probably in excess of 20 bras since summer, just trying to find one that doesnt have me doubled in pain, im quite large breasted and of course most that arent wired give no support, so i try to get away with just a vest top, ok if ya in house alone but not good to go out. and yes i find myself sat many a night propping my bust up so it doesnt sit on my ribcage. its no wonder we feel like we dont want to go out and be around ppl isnt it. what i will say to you is i went docs last year and was a locum doc, my face fell when i walked in n saw she was a slip of a girl, she looked about 15 tbh, but she was probably the most helpful and through doc ive seen, i think all her training was fresh in her head and she was really trying hard. she actually took time to explain my results to me, and to explain that even if i did go on hrt it was a short term thing, that as soon as i stopped taking i would go back 4 yrs to the beggining of the journey. unfortunately next time i went she had moved on and i got the same old male doc who basically made me feel that i was weak for not just riding it out in silence, so once again thats me done with docs, until the next time i get desperate. its so hard to get them to understand its the hormones making me jittery, before all this started the previous time id been to docs was 7 yrs previously,
im sorry im wittering again hehe, its just been so lovely to be able to vent and not feel alone with this. as you said please stay in touch deb, its been great to chat. xx
debwestmids sharon11608
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Hope you have a good day tomoz xx
sharon11608 debwestmids
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i can fully understand the bit about sitting bein uncomfy esp after eating, but for me the worst is laying down, almost like something is flopped back on something else in my chest/stomach it has like a dull throb almost like a pulsing, not painful but un nerving non the less. good to hear you had a good nights sleep, that makes all the difference on how we feel.
i feel same as you i try not to tell ppl how im really feeling, tending to just say "fine thanks hows you?" cos it does seem that all i ever talk about is how crappy i feel, so yes to be able to say it on here to others who know what it actually feels like is brill. chat soon, hope your having a good day xx