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Hi, I started my first year at Uni in September, since then my life has been on a downward spiral. I am already a year behind as I failied my exams so had ot resit a year at school. At first I didnt enjoy Uni as I couldnt find anyone I clicked with or that went out and had a good time. I have felt very isolated and alone sitting in my room all by myself, at first my boyfriend and family were always there for me and came to visit so that every week I had something to look forward to. Then one day out of the blue my boyfriend of 3 years broke up with me, he was my best friend and absolute everything, I have never loved or cared for a person like him. He is in second year at a different Uni and basically just wants to be a typical single boy with no cares. This breaks my heart to hear him say and to see him getting close with other girls. I have looked into dropping out of Uni however to my parents that woud make me a real dissappointment and a waste of money and honestly im not even sure what I would do. Slowly over the pst two and a half months I have got to the point where I dont even know what im living for anymore. I have no career prospects, no real future, I cant sleep and I just feele like im hvaing to stop myself from breaking down every second. Since being home for Christmas ive felt exactly the same, I hate social situations becasue no matter how hard I try I cant seem to force myself to have fun. I have also found that I get very anxious when I go somewhere I once went with my ex and it feels like my heart is racing and I dont know what to do. My fmaily have become very short dempered with me and get very angry when im feeling low. I could go back to Uni but I hate it there and it makes me feel vert low or I stay at home where noone wants me to be becasue they say im miserable. I try so hard to put on a smie etc but inside im hurting so badly. I feel like the pain wont go away and I just want some release! I dont understand what the point in being here is, I cant talk to anyone as noone understands. I have nothing great in my future so is there even a point?
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