Feeling very low today

Posted , 7 users are following.

sad Evening guys,

Hope you don't mind but I just need to have a moan

I was diagnosed with Fibro in May after a year of back and forth to a few GPs with symptoms and not accepting their diagnosis of depression.

Since Oct last year I have been at work just 4 months and for that time I had to reduce my hours from 37 to 16. I have currently been signed off since mid June and am not coping very well at the moment - So far work have been very understanding and accommodating to my needs and I am waiting to start home working, but I was told today that the powers that be are not happy with me doing this on the part time hours but there is no way at the moment I can return to 37 a week (Not yet anyway)

Because I have had to have so much time off it got to the stage where I was having to use my credit cards to compensate my drop in wages and I have been juggling everything (like you do) but have now dropped all the balls as I slip into overlimits on my cards.

I started claiming HB in Jan and despite keeping them up to date each month with my wage slips and situation have managed to accrue £500+ overpayment cry

I have a PIP f2f assessment next week which I'm dreading, my sick note runs out on Wed, and although my current GP is good, I'm sure she doesn't believe me when I say I don't feel any better - if anything I feel worse since I last spoke to her, but I'm getting anxious about speaking to her (how mad does that sound?)

I am so tired and in a lot of pain and the situation I'm now in is triggering the depression and anxiety which is making my IBS symptoms worse, meaning I have to keep going to the loo, which is making me more tired and aggrevating my pain - Aarrrggghhhh vicious circle

Family are being great and supportive but I have sat here and sobbed for the past hour - feel slightly better now that I have got it off my chest and I'll probably be all perky tomorrow, but today I just needed to moan - Thanks so much for listening.

Very gentle hugs (and stray tears) to you all xx

4 likes, 16 replies

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16 Replies

  • Posted

    Sending big hugs to you - I myself was diagnosed in May and I'm on reduced hours too.

    Stay strong and stay confident when you see your doctor. It's so important that we don't allow others to sway how we are feeling and allow others to manipulate what we are trying to explain. It takes time and it takes patience to prove we are not just mKong up our symptoms.

    Things will get better! X

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  • Posted

    I know how you feel hope the moan made u feel a bit better that's all that we need sometimes n we are all here to listen I am still trying to work as well but my employer is not very understanding so don't know how long I can go on I also feel like crying some days as I feel people just think we r malingering n not in that much pain hope u feel better soon gentle hugs if u need to tallk or moan just contact me I will b glad to listen x
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  • Posted

    Hey erykah, glad that you are feeling a lill better now, it's very tough at times, I feel that also is a symptom of what we have, feeling helpless and alone, but always remember that you are not alone, and well done for putting up your post!

    I hope your PIP assessment goes well, let us know.

    Gentle hugs for you

    Take care and be kind to yourself


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  • Posted

    Hi Katherine

    I know it's tough, when I had pains over 20yrs ago I was working full time. My pains started back in 1993 and Ihad my first child in 1997. Although I was pain free during my pregnancy after birth the pains came back with avengence. I had to take a year out of work in 2001 as the pains were unbearable. Financially I couldn't afford to do that and was feeling more stressed worrying about mortgage and other bills. So I looked for part-time work and managed to get 20hrs per week. This job I started in 2002 and I am still working there.  In 2004 I had my second child and kept the part time hrs and when he went to full-time school in 2008, I increased my hrs to 25hrs a week. Now Aug 2015 I will be increasing to 30 hrs a week. Although the pains are with me daily, I have good team at work who have been quite supportive and without this support I would be lost.  

    I understand how you feel as I have on many occassions wanted to give up, but also needed to job. Start off with reduced hrs then increase when you know you can.  I know some employers do not support their employees but everyone has the right to the right working environment.  The employer should make your workstation comfortable for you to do your daily tasks, so if they want you to work full hrs then they need to make adjustments for you.

    Have you Occupational Health at work and they can assist you?  Ask about Access to Work, they will assess your workstation and ask your employer to make necessary adjustments for you.

    Gentle Hugs and stay positive and hope things work out for you. wink xx

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  • Posted

    Hi erykah71 its good your family are being supportive, we all need good support with our condition. Trying to  cope with fibro is hard enough with out any pressures from any where else be it financial or work.employers have to by law support you with any adjustments that need to be done in the work place to help you do your job. if they dont they are breaking the law.citizens advice is always a good place to go for information and help in what ever situation you find you may in. the more we stress worry the more pain we find ourselves in. last week because I was so stressed worried I had IBS for 5 days. and was in alot of pain.try deal with 1 thing at a time when things are jumbled up it makes things seem a whole lot worse. try deal with things seperatly and 1 at a time. Just be honest with your gp dont hold back to how your feeling. I had a pip assessment face to face at home the lady that came out was very nice the assesment lasted 1 hr. they go through the questions 1 by 1 and check the answears that you have written on the form. she then writes a report everything is sent the dwp for them to decide on whether you get pip or not.dont ever feel alone we are here for each other take care gentle hugs
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  • Posted

    Hi erykah

    It took me 30 years to get my formal diagnosis, so you're not doing too badly. 

    Sometimes it helps to just let it all out. We all understand how you feel. I used to have a v good GP but he moved on. Even though I have a formal diagnosis from a Rheumatologist and diagnoses from two other GP's, my current GP obviously doesn't believe how much pain I am in. 

    I have to go back to see her on Wednesday and I am already dreading it. So, no. You are not being unnecessarily anxious. 

    Unfortunately stress causes our pain levels to shoot up so it is just a vicious circle. 

    Sending you a gentle hug xx


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  • Posted

    Hi Erykah, sorry your struggling so much at the moment. Having a good moan is needed from time to time, trust me I've been doing enough of it myself lately, and I don't have all the extra pressures of work etc that your dealing with. Letting it all out is much better, especially with people you know will understand and support you. I also know sometimes it seems like that's all we do is get upset and then we start to worry about what others will think of us. ive only just started to reply to discussions on here after a week and a bit as I hit a real low, but that only sets up a vicious circle. So let it out and we will all try to get you through. 

    Gentle hugs xx

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  • Posted

    Morning Katherine, Debbie, Boqer, Bee, Kaz, Bluebell & Lisa

    I would just like to say a big thank you for all of your messages last night when I was having a bit of a wobble. 

    I went up to bed early (and did cry myself to sleep) but I had a really good nights sleep, which was badly needed and I feel much better about things today.

    Your compassion, support and understanding was the perfect medicine, and even though I'm crying again (Big cry baby at the moment lol) it's for a whole different reason - I am so glad I found this forum as I am amazed how everyones situation relates to what I'm feeling in one way or another.

    Thanks again everyone, I am very grateful for the support

    Gentle hugs and lots of love to you all x

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    • Posted

      Morning erykah71glad u had good night last night n are feeling a bit better today you are more than welcome and know we are here to listen anytime

      Gentle hugs n take care xxx

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    • Posted

      Hello erykah

      I'm so glad you got so much support. I only just joined the site at the weekend. I haven't posted yet, but answered a few posts. 

      It is so fantastic when we can all support each other. 

      Lots of love to you too xx


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    • Posted

      so pleased to hear you are feeling much better. we are all here for you, dont ever feel alone sound off as much as you like. take care gentle hugs xx
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  • Posted

    Hi Erykah, your more than welcome. Glad to hear you had a good nights sleep. I think that helps when your trying to cope, struggling and tired are never a good mix. Stay on board and you'll continue to find the support. 

    Take care and gentle hugs xx

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