Felling guilty about being signed off work sick.

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4 weeks ago i was taken to hospital with susspected meningitis, i spent the night there whilst they hooked me on to a drip, pumped me with paracetamol and took numerous blood tests, they finally told me i had glandular fever and a swollen liver and spleen. I was advised to take time of work (i have worked for my company for almost 4 years) i had to go back to my doctor every week for more blood tests and to be under watch.

I have been off work for 4 weeks now, with a sick note but am still not feeling very well! i have been told it can take atleast 2 months to recover from glandular fever and shouldn't return until i feel okay again. I also suffer from stress and depression since loosing my baby 2 years ago through complications during my pregnancy and i am finding having glandular fever is making me feel sad and depressed again.

my partner is making me feel guilty about being off from work even though my doctor, manager and my parents all agree i am not in any position to return yet. Has anyone had glandular fever before and how long was you off work for? also how do i deal with my partner making me feel bad? im starting to feel as if im doing the wrong thing by being off work, i just need a bit of support so i don't feel so bad about it all.

any answers will be apprechiated :-)

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13 Replies

  • Posted

    Oh my goodness you poor thing!! You've had a really hard time and don't need your partner to be making you feel any worse sad You are doing everything right by taking time to recover and it is your partner who needs a change of attitude, not you. 

    I'm not sure how you could get your partner to see sense here but maybe they need a bit of education regarding glandular fever and depression. And if you feel that depression is getting worse, you might need to visit your doctor to see what can be done!

    I wish I could help more but I'm sending virtual hugs!

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    • Posted

      Thanks so much for your reply joonebug!

      I was back at my doctors yesterday and they have upped my citalopram dosage and also given me multivitamins to boost my immune system and energy so hopefully i will feel a bit better soon smile

      sending virtual hugs back!!

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  • Posted

    My two cents is that you might be feeling sad and depressed because you're off your normal routine and probably aren't interacting with people as much as your normally would. If you're up to it - try to spend time with people that know and love you even if it's just a 1/2 hour at a time. 

    Don't let your partner guilt you into going back to work if you're not up to it yet. Only you know how you really feel and can decide what's right for you.

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    • Posted

      Thanks for your reply sonja3124!

      My mum and sister have spent a lot of time round my house as they understand me and know me well smile i am also trying to go for little walks for fresh air as that is what my doctor has advised!

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  • Posted

    Hi

    sorry tohearyou are not getting support from the main one in your life,but be assured the people i.e GP and Manager think you should be at home so providing you are certificated you won't be in trouble at work.Perhaps your O/H does not know how to handle you being sick and thinks if you are back at work everything is normal,but no point in going back and maybe making things worse and will then be off  longer.

    perhaps you could point this out to him,

    .

    wish you well we are all here for you if you want to have a rant.

    take care

    Joan

     

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    • Posted

      Thank you for your reply joan152!

      I also think he doesn't know how to handle me being sick, even if i have a cold he seems to go a bit strange on me... he has a really strong immune system so never seems to get sick, lucky him.

      yes i will point that out to him and hopefully he will understand a bit more smile

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    • Posted

      I'm a big believer in karma his time will come when he will want understanding from you.and people around him no one gets through this life unscathed don't care who they are.What goes around comes around,he'd do well to be reminded of that. I call it plain shellfish his behaviour.The lose of a baby is sad,don't ever get over that but you go forward.Now you came down with Glandular Fever that s a nasty virus to get leaves you with no energy etc friends son had it bad.You take your time go back to work when your ready and your know when.Keep mum and sister close like you said they know you best not the boyfriend.takecare xx
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    • Posted

      You just consider taking care of you,your the most important one who needs the TLC .Get in the sunshine gets your immune systems going.that's taken a knock through the glandular fever and lots of vitamin C and rest up when you need to.Im a older mum it's what I'd be telling my daughter to do Lau.Keep in touch with how you are, will be thinking of you xxx
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    • Posted

      Thank you smile I have been resting lots and do feel a bit better than i was before! i am going to see my doctor next tuesday to discuss a phased return back into work as i am aware that i have had quite a while off now and don't want to be off for much longer and risk loosing my job as i cant afford to do that!! xx
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    • Posted

      Hi you sound lot happier that's good sign. It's hard on you these days with jobs and being sick,so much pressure.My day fair few jobs about not like today keep doing what you've been doing your dr will let you back to work when he thinks your okay.Chin up and don't worry keep in touch with how you go on Lau xxx
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  • Posted

    I'm so glad I came across this thread. I found out I've got glandular fever yesterday. I've had 9 cases of tonsilitis in 10 months and am just waiting for a pre op appointment to have my tonsils out. I was just recovering from my last episode when this happened. Had a blood test last week that showed up that I'd had glandular fever recently but then yesterday I had the worst pain in my throat which is worse today and I have blisters down my throat. I'm weak, feel sick and I'm really teary. This is my 4th week off work and I can't see me being well enough next week either. That's my full time job, I am a freelance make up artist too and I had to cancel a trial for a bride tonight. I'm supposed to be doing her wedding party make up next Saturday! I never let my brides down. I also had a miscarriage 2 and a 1/2 years ago after 7 years of trying for a baby. I then got the courage to leave my unsupportive husband last April and have been pretty run down ever since along with about 2 years of insomnia. I do sleep now but I believe this has led to my ill health. Any advice any of you have is welcomed, I'm super fed up of feeling ill and I want my life back. 
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