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I'm originally from the Isle of Man but I live in England because I met my boyfriend and we had a child. He's from England and he didn't want to live in the Isle of Man so we live here. I've been here for 2 years and i have made no real relationships despite my effort. I have fibro myalgia so i'm in alot of pain all the time, along with chronic fatigue, i work nights then get up with my son in the morning, i am tired all the time and it takes its toll really badly. i never stop my boyfriend from going out when the opportunity comes up because he works hard and deserves it, he didn't come out for my birthday because his friend had a christmas party that night, i couldn't go to my best friends birthday that was in a city i went to uni in because he had a works due even though i had planned it months ago and he found out about his night out three days before hand, i couldn't go out for his mums hen party because his brother forgot to get a babysitter for his stepdads bachelor party. i rarely go out because i dont have any friends to go out with and when the opportunity arrises i usually cant go. i tell him its ok if he stays out late just to let me know thats what hes doing. For the first time ever, in three years we've been together i wanted him home early because i had a panic attack, i rang him to see if he knew when he was coming home because if it was soonish i wasn't going to ask him to come home i could have waited and he started shouting at me saying he deserves a night out because he works hard all week, and started accusing me of checking up on him and that he wasn't going to cheat. i have never accused him of cheating, or even thought that he might have. this is what i come back to. i go to the isle of man and though i may still have the odd panic attack and still tired i'm happy and i have loads of friends and im always busy so i stay out of my head but as soon as i return to england i'm lonely again, and im stuck in the house or at work with no social life. i don't know what to do because he is a good man and a good father but he has not long gotten his dream job here and doesn't want to move but i'm so depressed. i've seen three different councillors and been on anti-depressents since not long after my son was born and i dont know what to do. someone please help me.
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