good day bad day

Think you are pushing yourself a bit hard perhaps. Depression is a weeks/months (and sometimes years) condition built up over a long time. The doctor will continue to sign you off until you feel you want to go to work (not when you feel you ought to go to work).

If you go too soon you can come down to earth with a bump and think why did I go back, equally if you are off months and months it can also be tricky to get back - difficult one but for me I think you have to feel really well then go back staged with the tablets for support. I have been at home for 4 months now and improving rapidly now (hideous side effects were worth it everyone).

Have been to a neutral part of work for a couple of hours each week for the last 3 weeks and am due to go in next week to where my office is, just for a chat. The following week, I hope to do a day and some work hopefully!, the next week a few days and so on. This may seem slow but feels right for me. I am over the guilt thing as work caused this so my loyalty is now to myself and my family first, although I still want to do a good job.

My husband has been taking me in and I have felt very tearful, anxious and sick but it's getting less the more I've gone in. Counselling also starts next week to give me some management techniques to help me get over this last hurdle. Staying on tabs till I've been back and coping for a while.

Best of luck :hug:

Know what you mean Chalkie, I have that too, good days and bad. I thought the tablets would level that out and they did for a while, but now I am up and down like a yo yo!

Hi Peanut Girl,

Your comments are welcomed. You say i have to feel really well before considering work. At the moment i dont go have a part of the day when i dont feel awful, seems to come in hourly spurts. I feel that if i went back to work and had a bad moment i think i would break down. Will these feeling ever go ????? I am trying to do my best at home but i find it such hard work to keep up the brave face. My wife as been great but she is no doctor and i know it must be hard for her, which in turn makes it harder for me to cope, vicious circle.

Please keep posting your thoughts guys it really does help me and i'm sure others.

Thanks Again

Chalkie.

Hi Chalkie,

From what I remember you are only in the first few weeks of this? You are being so hard on yourself! I remember all those first feelings, the sadness, hopelessness, guilt, anxiety - all of that will gradually ease for you but I know you can't see that when you are in the situation.

I came on to this site when I was prescribed flu back in October and thought I couldn't ever see a way out of it, particularly as the side effects add to the depression in a way. I did start to feel better but after several weeks, i.e around 6/7, not the 2-4 weeks it says on the info.

The other problem is you don't know what to do with yourself do you, I didn't. I couldn't make decisions, wasn't interested in my hobbies, couldn't concentrate to read or watch tv - It's almost like your head is so stuffed with info, you can't retain anything else. I went through the motions of small jobs around the house, did some walking, bit of pampering, avoided listening to news or sad things, played music. Woke up one day with a much clearer head and gradually did a little more, then a little more. Avoided work altogether as I threw up just thinking about it so blocked it out in the end.

You will feel better in time but I know it's hard keeping positive. I found that anything to take the pressure off helped so hubby was superb doing lots of the children ferrying about so I didn't have to go out too much to begin with. Take care :wink:

Forgot to say, don't put on a brave face, let it out.

Show your wife this site so she knows you aren't going mad, you are ill and going to get better. :biggrin:

Thanks Peanut Girl,

You truly are a wonderful person. I think a lot of pepole (including myself up until the last week) are very mis-informed about depression almost to the point were they dissmiss it. I really dont know how i would have coped if i would'nt have found this site.

Thankyou all.

P.S. I went to the supermarket early and did a shop and did'nt feel intimadated spose this is a good sign ????

Dont like bumping in to friends at the moment.

Very good sign!!!

Avoiding everyone is usual, I didn't speak to a soul apart from hubby, children and sibling for a month. Told one friend, then another and so on........ Upt o groups of people socially now......

small steps, don't rush.

P.S I'm not wonderful but know where everyone here is coming from to some degree. I know how bad it feels and want to help.

well done for the supermarket!

You seem to have made so much progress already. going out to the supermarket etc is so good i still struggle now to go out.

Nicki B You must try to get out. I find that if i can go for a long walk it really helps.I also say hello to people i never seen before, this makes me feel good. I must admit i do avoid people i know i just can't be bothered to explain.

Try your best to get out Nicki B and all the best.

thank you for your encouragement im just like everyone else with good days and bad days. Im getting better just taking my time each day x