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Today has not been a good day for me. I found out my friend was killed in a motorcycle accident. This is devistating. So right away I'm emotional and not well. Then comes the anxiety part. I tend to catastrauphasize things and I have OCD so I obsess over these horrible thoughts. My biggest trigger is world events. Today's big trigger: Ebola in the US. I'm freaking out. Panicked. Sick over it. I feel like I can't cope with this one. I don't want to live in fear but I do. I live in fear of everything that is outside my control. I want to avoid it, prepare for it, etc. But then my friend is killed by a semi. This is insane. I am terrified of life. I started cit 10 mg and sometimes feel great but seems like the bottom falls out every couple of weeks and I have a big breakdown. I am also seeing a therapist about my issues but today I'm having a bad day.
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