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So I've being doing a lot better lately. It's why I haven't really been on here. But these last 4 or 5 days I feel like I'm getting worse again and I'm going crazy because I thought I was on the mend. First of all I shake basically all day long. Sometimes only internally like a vibrating but other times I can see it. It's worse when I haven't eaten. My arms still feel weak occasionally and so do my hands but it's been a lot better. My eyes are still weird. My doctor said it's probably just dry eye syndrome but idk. I have a hard time focusing, my vision gets blurry or cloudy randomly during the day and sometimes it feels like my vision is shaking but idk if it's just my head or neck shaking or what. I also feel this dread. It's not really anxiety or depression it's like a feeling of doom. Which I'm used to because of panic attacks but now the feeling sticks with me all day. Oh and now I can feel my pulse in my face. I'm just so tired. Sleep is basically impossible. I keep waking up shaking. I have so many thoughts that I'm going to die. I'm terrified it's something neurological. My dreams are terrifying too. I always dream I can't walk or move my arms or something else awful. I take ibuprofen pm or Benadryl but it doesn't work. My doctor gave me atenolol for my Supra ventricular tachycardia, but it made my hands and feet stiff and freezing cold so I couldn't keep taking it. I'm seeing her again tomorrow maybe she can give me a different beta blocker. I don't know what to do I'm afraid I have a brain tumor or MS or something even more rare and horrible I know how illogical I sound but I can't help it. My obsessive thoughts are out of control again.
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