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Health Anxiety is my life!!

Posted , 5 users are following.

emma93780
emma93780

Can't seem to get past the fear of something dreadful happening to my body, living in constant fear that I've got an incurable illness :-(

I have had so many tests and they have ruled out so many things however I am still convinced they have missed something as none of my symptoms have gone away, I have tried everything from online cbt to taking medication but I still feel I'm losing the plot, I've lost count the amount of times I've been to the doctors this year it's been ridiculous, please tell me I will get better :-(

0 likes, 10 replies

10 Replies

  • carolynne97143
    carolynne97143 emma93780

    Posted

    When I am anxious I do think that I will have an incurable disease and will not have to deal with the anxiety any more and I have hoped that I would be ill and not have to live very long!

    I have had a breast screening which was fine but feel the same as you do. I am already on Fluoxetine and Amitriptyline for anx and depression but feel that it is not working. I dont have anything else to worry about and cannot understand why i feel so anx and depressed - i should be really happy that my son is now going to school but feel that i cannot celebrate yet incase i curse it!

    • emma93780
      emma93780 carolynne97143

      Posted

      It's just a constant battle that started 4 years ago with bad headaches I then convinced myself I had a brain tumour so had a ct scan all was normal then for 2 years I was fine I had my son then it kicked back in again with headaches then I found a lump on my jaw which turned out to be a benign lymph node, i fell pregnant with my second son last year and for the hole pregnancy I was fine had nothing but a month after he was born bang that's it it's been constant, heart pulps, sweating, tremors, numb face, headaches, extreme dizziness which is effecting my balance the list is endless and it's got to the point where I don't want to go out, I had another ct scan in June which was normal, and scan on my neck and face for abnormalities, bloods galore, seen ent privately twice but I feel so poo I still believe there is something wrong, I have a dull ache in the left side of my face all day everyday and it's hard not to concentrate all the time on it, then I'm dizzy all the time which makes me even more miserable, I am taking propanranol and sertraline at the mo which I've no idea if they are working, doesn't feel like it, I'm starting cbt soon so I'm praying it will help as I feel desperate to get out of this rut xx
    • michelle_34992
      michelle_34992 emma93780

      Posted

      Emma i could have written your post. I have been going through this for a year now. In fact I'm at this moment sat in urgent care centre terrified I have sepsis as I had an operation 2 weeks ago and have a wound infection and ear infection and worries its spread. I have intense face/head pressure and pain it makes it hard to focus on anything else. I've had symptoms of so many things brain tumours, heart failure, pulmonary embolism, lung cancer and now sepsis. I have a husband and 3 young children and they deserve better than this. I handed in my notice fornmy job yesterday as I cant work feeling this way. I'm not living just existing. I've had 4 cbt sessions and these symptoms wont go away.

      How long have you been on the sertraline? I'm not on anything but am considering taking medication.

    • emma93780
      emma93780 michelle_34992

      Posted

      Hi Michelle,

      It's really crap isn't it feeling this way! No matter how many times you try to explain to your nearest abs dearest they just don't get it, it takes over your life! Today I tried taking my kids to the woods with my husband to forget about things but my mind always wondered back to what's going on, what if this happens, what if it's this that & the other, then it all starts again sheer worry & panic, I usually think once I'm home the worry will settle but it's not, I'm now paranoid that these lumps on my jaw are cancer and because I've got a really dull ache in the same side at the back of my head that it's spread! I honestly don't know where these thoughts are coming from I never used to be like this, it's just taking over my life😢

      I have been on the sertraline for 2 weeks now so it's still early days, I was in such a state that I needed help and if that means medication then so be it, I'm not proud I'd give anything to not wake up & feel this way every day!

      I'm sorry to hear your not well how did you get on is everything ok? Xx

    • michelle_34992
      michelle_34992 emma93780

      Posted

      Hi Emma,

      The Dr wasn't concerned as my observations were normal. Funny enough whilst sitting in waiting room I didn't have the chills or nausea.

      I just want to get better, I find it so hard to believe it ks anxiety as i have such varied physical symptoms pretty much everyday. Today I have very bad upper back pain near my lungs it switches sides I've had it a while now.

      I hope the sertraline starts working soon I've read that in the first few weeks it can make anxiety a bit worse before it gets better so hang on in there! What dose are you on? Also were you prescribed it just for anxiety or also depression?

      I hope you are well today?

      Have you been referred for therapy?

    • emma93780
      emma93780 michelle_34992

      Posted

      Bless you hun, it really is a rubbish time isn't it for all that have HA, I am on 50g of Setraline, I tried it once before used to take it at night and it made everything 10 times worse so I stopped it but this time round I take it in the morning when I can busy myself and yes I get dizzy, sick, etc but I know in my head that the tablets are making things worse of course it doesn't stop me worrying that it's not the tablets, I'm not sure if they have started working yet as they say they take about 4-6 weeks to kick in but to be honest I'll give angthing a go right now! I start CBT next Thursday and have been referred for 1-1 counselling so one of them have to work.

      Our mind is such a powerful place it's scary the things it does, no matter how we try to tell it different it always sucks us back in to it's way of thinking, just now I have a swollen pallet so of course I'm thinking there is something going on in my mouth which is causing this! I just don't get how we got to where we are?!

      Do you know when it first started as I can't put my finger on it?

      Hope things have settled for you x

  • angelo01cruz
    angelo01cruz emma93780

    Posted

    hi emma93780

    I can only imagine how hard it is to endure what you're going through. Anxiety is a powerful force that can break a person both physically and mentally. If you have done everything and have yourself checked so many times but the results are always the same and they clear you for any disease then I think it's now time to accept the fact that it's all in your head. Hypochondriasis I think is the term for this disorder. Try consulting a psychiatrist or a clinical psychologist. I do hope that you overcome your anxiety.

  • lisalisa67
    lisalisa67 emma93780

    Posted

    For decades people with ulders were told it was anxiety and it turned out it was h pylori. interestly a clean diet and lots of water and a probiotic would aid the healing somewhat. We are all trapped in this severe anxiety cycle and to some point its anxiety but i just believe there is a missing puzzle piece to all this. Whatever this is effects rationale thinking so just maybe a clean healthy diet can be of use so the immune system can figure it out  work on it. Just my own theory but it is more then negative thinking, it has to be.although a good mindset absolutely aids the body in healing.
  • katey64108
    katey64108 emma93780

    Posted

    Im same it all started four week ago with a pain in my left breast whicj i get now and again over years . I thought it was cancer been checked its ok. Then i thought i had and still have cervical cancer and cant fet a test. I also think my heart will stop at any moment and im constantly on edge. And thinkin of death all day long.its awful i was ok before i haf this pain in my breast.it just seemed to eculate from there. Im now on propranlol tablets and kalms . Its that bad ive boyght some gaelic tablets for my heart .. Katey xx
    • emma93780
      emma93780 katey64108

      Posted

      Bless you hun it really is a horrible feeling, there's no harm either in admitting we all need help whether it be from therapy or medication, I just feel so on edge all the time it's unreal I don't know why but I just can't get these thoughts that I'm going to die out of my head, every heart pulpertation I think it's going to stop, every dizzy spell I'm going to black out, every headache it's a tumor and my mind is just exhausted, I've got a constant upset tummy & losing weight and convinced myself that it must be the worst although it's probably sheer worry (try telling my head that)! I know they say don't go on google cos it's always worst case scenario but I can't help it which means I keep torturing myself all the time and my mind isn't going to get a break! I'm dealing with all this by myself despite having and husband and 2 small kids as they don't understand what it's like etc! I hope that the tablets work for you, the propanranol certainly calm your heart rate down, what dosage are you taking? Xx
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