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Started on Mirtazapine 15mg last night. Terrible day today done nothing but sleep and stare at the wall. Haven't cut myself but scratched myself with a key to make

Marks. Really want to disappear. I know they say give it time to work but how can you when you're in constant pain? 2-4 weeks is a long time. Been on sertraline 50mg and citalopram 10mg briefly previous to this. Both had side effects so doc advised to stop. Rang Samaritans earlier having been too scared to for days. Couldn't have been less helpful. I'm

So low and I despise myself. I want to die

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  • Posted

    Hang on in there. I get severe, suicidal depressions too (as part of bipolar). But mirtazipine is a miracle drug in my case, and i know loads of other people who have found the same thing. It works really well especially if your depression hasnt responded to other drugs. 

    I agree about Samaritans im afraid: i dont think theyre the best people to ring if your in mental health crisis. The 'point' of samaritans is just to listen. Nothing else. No advice, no support, no sympathy as such. Its really for people who just want to talk things out or vent or confess something they cant tell anyone else. But if youre badly depressed, that 'wall of silence' - the non-commital, non-involved response just feels like implied criticism or contempt or rejection. 

    I would use the MIND website - they are for mental health advice and support.

    Or you could ask your doctor to refer you to your local mental health team - they have crisis phone numbers answered by a psychiatric nurse so youd get someone who knows what theyre talking about and could do somthing to help if you really felt at risk of selfharm etc.

    Unfortunately all drugs take time to work ... 2-4 weeks for mirtazipine however is pretty fast - other antidepessants sometimes take up to 8 weeks, so Doctor has given the right pill to try next. it shows theyre taking you seriously. I know side-effects are a pain, but i would definitely stick at the mirtazipine for 4 full weeks then go back and discuss how its going with the doctor. 

    Hope this helps - I have been under GP, psychiatrists, mental health workers and nurses one or the other for 22 years!, so Ive been around this sad old block a fair few times. please ask if theres any advice you need. Take care

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    • Posted

      Thank you for your response. I didn't take my tablet last night which was stupid but things are looking a bit clearer today so I'll resume tonight and try to stick it out.

      Wish I'd known that about Samaritans before I called! The wall of silence as you put it was making me nervous. I will try Mind, if I find the mental health team for my area can I call the crisis number if I need to or will I need to be referred? I've been referred for CBT but been told not to hold my breath as its 6-12 month wait sad 

      Thanks for replying. It means a lot to know people care.

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    • Posted

      Yep I learnt the hard way that the pills dont work if you just put the packet on a shelf wink you have to remember to take them every night without fail!

      Dont worry if mirtzazipine makes you sleepy... thats kinda the point, especilly at first when your sleep has prob been disturbed for a while. Time to catch up on zzzz's and get some quiet, calm time as much as poss while yr brain gets the help it needs from the pills.

      Mental health team needs a referral from your GP really - ask yr GP next time you go (should be about 3-4 weeks time so doctor can see how yr getting on with the pills).  GPs can be a bit cagey about referring if they think anti-D's wil be enough on their own, but you should certainly ask for a referral if you feel you need the support. I would definitey explain about your self-harm in the past, and any suicidal thoughts - they may persuade yr doctor  a referral is a good idea.

      Otherwise, you could try your local library or City or County Council website for support groups, advice centres, etc - even my little rural town hs several different groups and a free counselling service. Waiting lists are long everywhere for psychotherapy/CBT, but there are lots of free services you can access straightaway while you wait.

      Plus, it will prob be better to do the CBT once the pills have started to work - you will be in a better frame of mind to concentrate, rememmber, and feel positive about the therapy. 

      Take care x


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  • Posted


    I sympathise as I suffer from severe depression that has affected me physically as well - which is a wake up call as to what a damaged mind can do to your body.

    On other posts I have commented on how poor the current ADs were. I've just been on Valdoxan for 3 weeks and can honestly say it has done nothing for me. A lot of hype - hope it helps some people.

    I took Mirtazapine for a while. I was in a very stressful job so gave it up as it was making me sleepy.and I thought I couldn't let that happen. I'm now in a situation where I'm redundant, depressed and stomach problems that, after tests, were put down to stress.

    Mirtazapine is one drug which scores highly on relieving depression. Unfortunately it makes you sleepy and you have to be careful not to put on weight. But the sleepiness does eventually lessen (I'm told), surprisingly even if your dose is increased.

    If I had the chance again I would have taken 6 weeks off work - taken the Mirtazapine - slept during the day if I wanted to and accept that it will be a few weeks before the side effects get a little better and the depression lifts. I would have set aside everything else and allowed my mind and body the healing time it needed.

    Please just block everything out and let the medication work - it's only when you start to feel a little better that you can address negative thoughts. Until that time nothing else matters - sleep, stare at the wall or watch Jeremy Kyle - with the knowledge that you need to accept this period before you can tackle the root cause of your stress and depression.

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