Help- what help should I invest in?

Posted , 4 users are following.

I’m not living at the moment. I spend most of my time in bed sleeping, cancel plans, don’t cook, clean, let me 88 year old Nan do everything. I live with her.

I have been under a private psychiatrist for 3 years and haven’t improved, if anything I’m worse. I’ve seen 2 counselling psychologists, a cbt therapist and briefly a clinical psychologist. 

I’m not working and although I can get jobs I’m struggling to maintain one and pass probation.

Any suggestions as to what help I should invest in I would be grateful. I have some savings and am worried to use them but I feel I’m at real risk of never getting better.

I’m desperate.

1 like, 5 replies

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5 Replies

  • Posted

    Hi there 

    Don’t make big plans or commitments 

    That way you will not feel you have failed if the don’t pay off 

    How about starting tomorrow it’s saying right I’m going to get up and change my bed , have a shower and a chat to your nan

    That’s a big ask in one day but you have all day to do it 

    I’ve never used a group called talking matters but here they are very good and available on nhs

    Is there a reason you go private ?

    Would you not consider NHS ?

    Chin up keep chatting in here 

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    • Posted

      Hi Jude,

      Thank you for replying I really appreciate it.

      I’ve gone private as I found the Nhs psychiatrists I saw very poor. I could try them again I suppose.

      I’ll look into the talking matters. 

      Best wishes

      Hayley 

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    • Posted

      Ok that’s great what a positive response 

      Don’t want to sound patronising but first small step 

      Like any other illness you are able to choose your care / unit/ hospital 

      We don’t always rub along with people we are all different I suggest you say you didn’t feel comfortable and want to try someone new 😊

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  • Posted

    Don't waste time being desperate, no worrying about your nan.  She likes to take care of you (as much as she also wants to see you independent)!

    Just try sitting down and seeing what your values are.  What do you enjoy?  Could you make a career out of it?  Studying is the easy part, believe me.  You can study and remember things easily with the help of relaxaiton and largo and gregorian chant music, before and during study, and you will remember it easily.

    Even if, after asking yourself what you really enjoy, you can't think of much, nor much that could become a career, just go for something!!  Nothing wrong with trying.

    Also, if you don't mind me saying, and i'm not judging (I don't give a sh*t), but you might want to reexamine your approach to work / duties.  I find duties like housecleaning, incredibly therapeutic and empowering.  Honeslty.  You get to feel good about giving, it makes you physically a bit stronger / more agile, and you get to see the good results of your work.  Maybe if nothing else what about a kitchen course and working as a kitchen hand / short order cook?  You can work part-time at first.   It will make you physically fit and you learn to cook good meals for yourself.

    Anyway, take one step a time.  Don't rush, but just do something every day.  and take up a hobby like meditation / chess / yoga!!!  do that every day too!! become a renaissance man!

    (you sound smart, so i believe you can do it)

    oh and i gave up sugar and processed foods biggrin

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  • Posted

    Hi the worst thing you can do is isolate yourself like this.  You need to still do a few things so start off by making the target getting out of bed.  When you are ok with this then do something else like washing up etc.  It is very important to do what you can and work up to bigger things slowly.  Small steps work.  x
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