Posted , 7 users are following.
I've been feeling low this week and was fed up with this feeling so yesterday I started drinking alcohol secretly (once in a blue moon I turn to alcohol when I'm really fed up!) had a really bad night sleep last night and now I've just got out of bed and my anxiety is so bad with bad heart palpitations I've poured myself a drink of sherry and lemonade to settle my nerves, I feel really low and so anxious ( I've had GAD for 10 years and I'm on citalopram and I know I'm not allowed to drink on them, I've been on them for 6 years) I feel so guilty feeling like this my 5 year old is with me playing with his toys (I never ever neglect my little boy and it put on a front that I'm happy as it was neglected and put in care) my husband is at work he is supportive with my anxiety and depression and my sister is coming round soon when it get like this she helps out cos she suffers the same! But drinking at the moment makes me feel normal and gets rid of some anxiety and makes me feel relaxed I know this isn't the answer! I'm normally active and eat super healthy but haven't been eating properly lately (had a banana yesterday and a dry cracker) can it just say this happens once in a blue moon when I get so fed up of being me (I've had depersonalisation for 11 years which is hate but I deal with it and cope with it!) I just need to get out of this rut the anxiety is unbearable!
0 likes, 15 replies
tess33005 pamela51740
Posted
I'm so sorry you're feeling so bad, Pamela.
Drinking alcohol will make things worse, especially when you're on citalopram.
Is your child at risk while you're drinking, love?
Good that your sister is coming round to help.
Lots of love. Tess xx
helen20833 tess33005
Posted
As you are a member of the medical profession, Tess, I was wondering what effect does alcohol have when people are on meds? I don't drink personally but I was curious.
xx
tess33005 helen20833
Posted
Simples.
And dangerous.
helen20833 tess33005
Posted
Ugh, scarey I'd hear about mixing alcohol with meds but never knew the effect they had
Thanks Tess !
tess33005 helen20833
Posted
helen20833 pamela51740
Posted
Aw sweetie I'm so sorry you are struggling.
You know the answer, right? You have to make an effort to get some nourishment into you. The body cannot work right without fuel. And I know, I know in desperation we turn to anything for relief, but we both know you have to stop drinking.
Hang in there, don't neglect yourself
Hugs
lee12629 pamela51740
Posted
lee12629
Posted
pamela51740
Posted
The alcohol makes me feel normal but a nightmare the morning after myself child is safe don't worry peeps I look after himself well, he's a mammys boy, it just feel less anxious when it have a drink, in not discover dancing around the room! My husband has just got home from work and my sister is here but I'm still secretly drinking! Just one more day of drinking then I will deal with the consequences tomorrow! My brother always says 'there's never a tomorrow only a today'
pamela51740
Posted
WoodWorker pamela51740
Posted
You are going to feel low at least 182 times a year, so why not strike a deal with your sister that you will share this syndrome together, agree with her that she can feel low on odd days only, and you can feel low on the even days, in between one hopes you will return to your normal self? Didn't you know that sherry and lemonde do nothing for the nerves and its your taste buds that were screamng out for attention, Taking a big guess (okay a little guess if you prefer) your bored, totally bored and are screaming out for some better company. For all I know your marriage is on the rocks, you need TWO job, and would suggest that working for 10 days on a chain gang would assist you to sleep better, and to eat better, Go out and buy 45 lb of meat (a full deer or sheep for the freezer) and get some real food inside you, otherwise you will start feeling downhearted on the odd days as well has the even days, when it's not your turn. Regular food, oxygen and water is healthy, banana and some crackers are unhealthy. You can mix the meat into canned vegetable soup if you wish, and do remember the Golden Rule, with meat consumption you must eat bread or the meat does you no good. Today is an odd-day, its your day off, so get to the butchers and change your diet, do try and run 10 miles per day, and buy a tent - sleep outside for a while so your body can feel at peace with nature.
kathy90177 pamela51740
Posted
phil76209 pamela51740
Posted
Hi Pamela,
I understand with the depersonalisation. I've had it 20 yrs. I know it sounds neg and I in now way want you to think the same but I think I will always have it.
But you never know stranger things happen at sea.
I'm not really religious but I pray anyway and try to be as compassionate as I can cos part of my problem which caused this was I was a negative thinker and critical of others.
Sounds like you deserve to have a drink every now and again if it makes you feel more relaxed.
You sound like a good mum and you have your child's interest at heart. You sound like a very compassionate person.
Have you ever had talking therapy about your childhood. Sounds like there's a link. But you prob know that already.
I'm in CFT at the moment. Compassion focus therapy. Week 4 of 12. It's helping.
helen20833 phil76209
Posted
I have never heard of that. Is it one to one or group therapy? It's good that it is helping you.
tess33005 phil76209
Posted
I've never heard of that, either. Must look it up.
Hopefully Pamela will get some information and help from it, too.
Join this discussion or start a new one?
New discussion Reply