Help! Worse anxiety ever!

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I've been feeling low this week and was fed up with this feeling so yesterday I started drinking alcohol secretly (once in a blue moon I turn to alcohol when I'm really fed up!) had a really bad night sleep last night and now I've just got out of bed and my anxiety is so bad with bad heart palpitations I've poured myself a drink of sherry and lemonade to settle my nerves, I feel really low and so anxious ( I've had GAD for 10 years and I'm on citalopram and I know I'm not allowed to drink on them, I've been on them for 6 years) I feel so guilty feeling like this my 5 year old is with me playing with his toys (I never ever neglect my little boy and it put on a front that I'm happy as it was neglected and put in care) my husband is at work he is supportive with my anxiety and depression and my sister is coming round soon when it get like this she helps out cos she suffers the same! But drinking at the moment makes me feel normal and gets rid of some anxiety and makes me feel relaxed I know this isn't the answer! I'm normally active and eat super healthy but haven't been eating properly lately (had a banana yesterday and a dry cracker) can it just say this happens once in a blue moon when I get so fed up of being me (I've had depersonalisation for 11 years which is hate but I deal with it and cope with it!) I just need to get out of this rut the anxiety is unbearable!

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  • Posted

    I'm so sorry you're feeling so bad, Pamela.

    Drinking alcohol will make things worse, especially when you're on citalopram.

    Is your child at risk while you're drinking, love?

    Good that your sister is coming round to help.

    Lots of love.  Tess xx

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  • Posted

    Aw sweetie I'm so sorry you are struggling.

    You know the answer, right? You have to make an effort to get some nourishment into you. The body cannot work right without fuel. And I know, I know in desperation we turn to anything for relief, but we both know you have to stop drinking.

    Hang in there, don't neglect yourself

    Hugs

     

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  • Posted

    Hi Pam, i can relate,a few drinks at times makes me feel halfway normal. Is your med a benzo? I take alprazolam,ive taken it since 2009,it never has given me a problem having a few drinks with it,but my dose isnt that high. Anyway thats not the issue. After i have drinks the next day,Im more on edge as drinking does affect the nervous system. I am sorry you are having such a hard time. Your sister and husband sound wonderfully supportive. Thats a huge plus. Dont be too hard on yourself,as long as your child is safe and your sister is going to help,just figure you needed a break. All of us know alcohol never really changes our problems,today is a new day. Tell your sister or your husband or both you had a few drinks. Worse to hide it. Then stop the drinking for the day and enjoy your sweet child. Xx
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    • Posted

      And please eat,Tess is right,best not to mix the meds and alcohol, just caus i havnt had a problem,doesnt mean someone wont. Especially not good with not eating . You have to eat.
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  • Posted

    The alcohol makes me feel normal but a nightmare the morning after myself child is safe don't worry peeps I look after himself well, he's a mammys boy, it just feel less anxious when it have a drink, in not discover dancing around the room! My husband has just got home from work and my sister is here but I'm still secretly drinking! Just one more day of drinking then I will deal with the consequences tomorrow! My brother always says 'there's never a tomorrow only a today'

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