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Have suffered from depression off and on throughout my life - after children and when my hormones were in a mess.  In 2013 two things happened - my husband started working away (after 23 years of being together) and my last child went away to University. Im ashamed to say that I didnt cope well - and even though it took the course of a year to establish - deep depression resulted. My husband didnt finish his secondment until end of July last year and even though my son was back by then - I was extremely depressed, suicidal even.  I lost my mum also back in 2010 and wasnt allowed to grieve having to look after my father, so it all came crashing down. 

Having terrible thoughts, I sought out some counselling and that was a turning point.  Also started taking citalpralm.  The counselling on its own probably wouldnt have been enough - but it did make a difference, made me realise that I wasnt alone and people did care and I did have a reason to carry on. 

8 months on and my life has completely turned around.  Have passed my driving test at the tender age of 48, and have a car as well.  I have made peace with the turbulent relationship I had with my deceased mother and still living father.

My husband was terrified of losing me and didnt realise how I low I had become. My children now realise that mum sometimes needs more love and reach out far more. 

Now dont get me wrong I still have my bad days - but I no longer think about walking into the sea for good or going to sleep never to wake, well not very often!  Sometimes I would like to just walk sideways and get away from the worries and hassles of life - but I just look into my husbands face and realise that this life is worth living. 

Just wanted to post here and tell people that depression doesnt last forever and if you are proactive in seeking help - albeit chemical or human - it does work and will bring you out the other side.  Dont suffer in silence - the pain will end if you get some help.

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6 Replies

  • Posted

    I'm 32 and after having 4 children to two terrible violent people and working 13 hour shifts as a single parent that's really helped me. I pray you get even better. Lots of love,

    Paulie xx

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    • Posted

      Thanks Clancy82 - its been a long road - but do feel like Im out the other side.  Looking at other people on this site it does make me feel a bit of a fraud however - even at my lowest I always thought that really I had nothing to be depressed about.  Hope you are okay now. biggrin
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  • Posted

    Hi, this sounds very similar to my ongoing worries etc. Just wanted to say it is really good to know that there is light at the end if the tunnel. You have done extremely well and should be very proud of yourself!! Hope it continues xx
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  • Posted

    Hi kathy

    Thanks for sharing your story

    It is always good to hear about people

    Who turn their life around after a series

    Of events . I too was in a dark place

    But now I'm slowly but surely getting there

    I wish you well

    Regards daz

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  • Posted

    Hi Kathy! your story really inspires me. Just always keep in your mind that everything happens for a reason. Knowing that this is only God's way to help us to become strong. Anyway, I'm hoping that you're ok right now smile
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    • Posted

      Hi chermacdowell

      Am so glad it has helped you in some way - just wanted to let people know that there is help if you seek it. The most understanding family in the world won't help deep depression unfortunately- that's my opinion anyway - best wishes to you x

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